Page 15 of No Strings

Go back to sleep Morgan. Do not think about Rhys or his dick. It’s Rhys!

I do my best to push thoughts of him out of my mind. Soon enough the house is quiet, and I try to go back to sleep.

I managed to stop thinking about Rhys and hisapparently amazing cock, according to the random girl, but unfortunately, I am haunted by Ethan. After tossing and turning, I look at the clock to see it's 4am and decidefuck it, now is a good enough time to get up.

Tip toeing out of my room, I can see Shane has a girl draped over him. I can’t help but roll my eyes. All he has to do is bat his eyelashes and girls fall at his feet; he has the silent mystery guy act down pat.

Once I find the light switch, I flick it on, followed by the kettle. While that is boiling, I grab my sketchpad and pencils.

Soon enough, I’m sitting at the table drinking my coffee and staring at a blank page. I pick up the pencil and let it twirl in my fingers, then I put the lead to the page and hope for the best.

It isn’t until I hear Rhys’s alarm going off that I realise how much time has passed. Snapping out of my hyperfocus I take in what is on my page. It’s an actual drawing. No hateful words, I really drew something.

In the centre of the page is a Magnolia with dripping leaves and a snake weaved in between the leaves and petals.

I hear one of the floorboards squeak with added pressure. My gaze flicks from the page to the girl currently sneaking into the kitchen. She looks at me stunned. She opens her mouth but closes it when I ask if she wants coffee.

“Um, no. No thank you.”

I shrug and go back to shading one of the leaves. The door opens and closes. Not long after she leaves, girl number two makes her departure as well. She keeps her head down, not making eye contact. I bite back a laugh, is this what living here is going to be like?

Soon enough, Rhys and Shane walk in talking in hushed tones.

“Oh shit, hey Mo.”

I have an amused grin on my face as I ask, “Have fun boys?”

“I know I did.” Rhys elbows my brother as he walks past him headed straight for the kettle.

I roll my eyes. “Why didn’t I see one of those women wearing your hat?”

“What?” Rhys turns from making his coffee, eyebrows furrowed.

“Ride the cowboy, wear his hat?”

Shane snorts as he takes a seat next to me. My eyes are trained on Rhys. “A bed warmer does not get my hat.”

“Oh my god.”

“What?” Rhys approaches the table with his coffee in hand. “That’s all she was.”

He sits down on the other side of me. The table isn’t small. And neither is the kitchen. But with a combination of their large frames and where I am sitting, with my back towards a corner, it was so I could see both doors which now feel like my downfall, I start to feel closed in.

“When I give my hat to a woman, she’ll be mine, it’ll be…” His voice starts to fade as I close my eyes and drop my head so they can’t see me.

I try to breathe; I can’t keep having these panic attacks. Rhys is still talking, I think I catch love and something about the future, but it all sounds muffled. Like my head is underwater. I focus on breathing. Taking a deep breath in and trying to think of anything.

Exhale, think of something. Inhale, what makes me happy? Exhale, coffee. In, drawing. Out,his voice pierces my bubble, “You can’t draw, you’re pathetic, only good for a root.”

Ethan’s voice is menacing. Mean. And that throws me further into a panic.

“Mo, it’s fine, it’s just us.” I nod, but when Shane places his hand on my forearm I flinch.

“Good to see you’re drawing again.” That’s Rhys. “This is pretty. A magnolia. Your favourite flower.” I didn’t know he knew that. “Did you know a snake can represent shedding of your old skin?”

This time I look up at him.

“I know right? How did I, of all people, know that?” Then he pulls his collar to the side to show off a snake slithering along his collar bone. It’s so lifelike. I don’t think, my hand moves on its own, tracing along the curves and scales. “We are not determined by how others see or treat us. We are determined by what we are here.” he points at my chest.