Page 59 of Nacho Boyfriend

“Step out of the vehicle, sir.”

Ignacio gives me a look I can’t place and unlocks his seatbelt. He slides out of the car with his hands up.

The officer gives Ignacio a once over. “Where are you coming from?”

Ignacio swipes his hand again. “We’re but lowly farmers from Tawl.”

“Uhh, huh.” The officer peeks his head in to look at me. “You guys headed to a convention, or what?”

“Mapuzo,” replies Ignacio. “We have family there.”

Shut up, Nacho. You’re going to get us arrested.

“Mapuzo?” the officer repeats incredulously.

Ignacio nods. “In the Mid Rim Territories.”

The officer leans in close to Ignacio, who, by the way, is still wearing that silly hat.

“Have you been drinking, sir?”

Please don’t crack a joke about the dark side.

“No, I have not.”

“It’s the hat,” I cry out. “He swerved because of the hat.”

The officer raises a brow at Ignacio and studies him for a long moment. Then something in him relaxes and he shakes his head fighting a laugh.

“The hat?”

“It got caught on the safety belt,” I say, leaning across the front seat.

The officer looks to Ignacio to confirm this and Ignacio nods coolly.

“Okay, I’ll let you off with a warning, but take off the hat while driving.”

“Will do.”

The officer nods at me, then tips his chin at Ignacio. “Drive safe and… may the force be with you.”

I wait until the officer walks back to his motorcycle before I yell at Ignacio.

“I’m going to slap you with my space buns. What were you thinking?”

He laughs as if he just cheated death. “I don’t know. I hardly recognize myself anymore. It’s pretty obvious the guy was a sci-fi fan—just the way he carried himself, you know? We’re just lucky he’s not a Trekkie.”

“You’re meshuggeneh, you know that? It means you’re a crazy fool.”

He grins at me and starts the engine. “Keep up the sweet talk, my dear. I’ll be here all night.”

We arrive at Aaron’s house without further incident. Costumed guests pack the small house, spilling out onto the front and rear patios. We don’t see Aaron right away, but I recognize a few people from the marketing firm. They greet me stiffly with forced politeness. Lord knows what they were told about why I no longer work with them.

Ignacio grumbles as we walk in.

“We must be cautious. You will never find a more wretched hive of scum or villainy.”

“Are you going to quote space movies all night?”