Page 70 of My Vampire Plus-One

Hoping against hope that she was home and would pick up, I called her.

To my relief, she answered on the first ring. “Sooooo,” she crooned. “How’s it going up there, all alone and snowed in with your fake boyfriend? Have you kissed him yet?”

I groaned at the reminder. God, I’d let him put his tongue in my mouth. The same mouth he used to drink people’s blood! If he hadn’t asked if he couldtaste meand turned everything upside down, I might have slept with him, too.

Leave it to me to not even be able tofakedate somebody without catastrophe.

I closed my eyes and shook my head. “I did kiss him,” I admitted. “And then things immediately got weird.”

“Weird?” Sophie said. “I love weird. Say more.”

In the background, I could hear music I vaguely recognized as the theme song toPAW Patrol. Suddenly, I felt bad about taking up Sophie’s time while her kids were still awake. “Are you sure you have time for this?” I asked.

“Marcus is handling bedtime,” she said. “Hearing about your weekend will be the best thing to happen to me this month. Now spill.”

“Reggie is a vampire.”

I told her every sordid detail. Afterwards, I had a fleeting moment of guilt because it was obvious Reggie didn’t share information about himself with everyone. But I needed Sophie’s help. Badly.

“Oh my god,” she said, when I was finished. “Reggie the hot man is actually Reggie the hot vampire. But not like those people on TikTok who think they’re vampires but are really just weirdos addicted to the online attention. Arealvampire.” She started laughing. “I can’t believe this.”

I closed my eyes. “Tell me about it.”

“When you called, I’d hoped it was to let me know you’d gotten some badly needed sex.” She laughed again. “I’m both disappointed that that’snotwhy you’re calling but also more delighted than I’ve ever been in my life.”

I sighed, then flopped down on my bed and threw an arm over my eyes. “You’re handling the news that vampires are actually real very well.”

“There are a lot of strange people out there,” she said. “And Reggie seems stranger than most. I guess you could say I’m shocked but not surprised.”

“Fair enough,” I said. “Okay, so, what do I do?”

Sophie was quiet a moment. “I think it depends. Was he a good kisser? Do youwantto get laid?”

Unbelievable. “That is not the point.”

“Sure it is.”

“Sophie,” I said, exasperated. “I am trapped in a housewith a vampire. Until an hour ago, I thought vampires were imaginary and hadn’t thought seriously about them since all my high school friends were going through theirTwilightphase. I am at a loss for what to do.Help me.”

“It is definitely unexpected,” Sophie admitted. “And I know you struggle a lot when unexpected things happen. But he’s been so nice to you.”

I bit my lip, thinking of all the little kind and thoughtful things he’d done for me since I’d met him. The way he’d been outraged on my behalf over the lack of food options at Aunt Sue’s party. How he’d agreed to come along on this family Wisconsin trip in the first place, even though he didn’t have to. The way he’d gone out into a literal blizzard just to make sure I’d have enough to eat while we were trapped.

“He has been very nice,” I admitted.

“Before you found out he was a vampire, had he ever done something that made you frightened for your safety?”

That was easy. “Never.”

Sophie hummed. “Yeah, I really don’t think he wants to hurt you.”

It was a relief to hear that. “You don’t?”

“No,” Sophie said. “He’s had tons of opportunities to kill you or drink your blood in the past few days. But instead of doing either of those things now that you’re trapped in Wisconsin, he chose to play tonsil hockey with you instead.”

I snorted. “Tonsil hockey? Really?”

“But seriously,” she continued, ignoring my protest, “if avampire you were trapped with wanted to hurt you, I’d have to think you’d already be dead.”