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Chapter Four

Hannah

By Sunday evening, I was feeling much better…and frankly, a little tired of hiding out in my—in Joshua’s bedroom. I suppose, as it had been almost a year since I’d kicked out Travis, I really should start sleeping in the master again, but…

I’d napped most of Saturday and had woken to the smell of homemade pizza. I’d managed to pull myself together to join the kids at the kitchen table, and to my surprise, Benny had proudly served the pizza.

When I’d glanced at Aswan in question, he’d smiled slightly. “Ben made it himself.”

Ben , huh?

“Aswan helped,” my oldest was quick to point out, and the two of them shared a look that told me not only was I right to hire this strange savior of an orc, but right to accept his help on a Saturday too.

I only managed to eat one piece, but: “Holy moly, Benny, this is really good!”

“Peeza! Peeza!” Joshua had chanted as Aswan cut his into small pieces, and even Tova had beamed at her big brother. “You can make pizza any time, Benny!”

My oldest wore a smile I hadn’t seen in a long time: pride, pleasure, and a bit of camaraderie. Like the time his soccer team won the regionals.

And I had another bowl of the soup, which made me sweat. Or maybe that was Aswan.

He’d shaken my hand again after he made us popcorn and settled the kids in front of the television for an evening movie. And I’d stood at the door and watched him walk to his car…pining like a nincompoop.

Tonight was a full day later, Sunday evening. I’d put the kids to bed—or at least, Joshua was asleep, Tova was getting there, and Benny was reading beneath his covers with the assumption I didn’t know about his flashlight stash. And I’d asked Aswan to stop by now that we could finally talk.

“Hi,” I greeted him shyly. “Thanks for sitting down with me so we could discuss the job before you officially take over.”

“Of course,” he rumbled in that delicious dark voice as he followed me to the dining room. “You’re feeling better?”

“Yeah, thanks in part to your soup.” I smiled over my shoulder. “I don’t know where you learned to cook like that, but it was much appreciated. You haven’t caught Joshua’s cold?”

He surprised me by following me to my chair and holding it out for me. “I told you, I don’t get sniffles.”

Oh yes, he had told me that, hadn’t he? I was too flustered to answer though, because when was the last time a male had held a chair like that for me? Aswan was a real gentleman, wasn’t he?

“I owned a restaurant,” he announced as he moved to the opposite side of the dining table.

It sounded so out of the blue that I frowned in confusion, and he merely grinned when he saw that. “In Colorado. We were living in a little town called Bramblewood Bluff when Sakkara tracked us down. I had a little restaurant there but decided to sell it.”

I gaped. “You sold your restaurant?” I couldn’t imagine how hard he’d had to work to build up a business like that, and he’d just abandoned it? “To become a nanny ?”

It was his turn to flush—at least I think that’s why his skin darkened and he looked away. “I sold it to follow my brother, Abydos, to Eastshore. I… He needs looking after.”

I studied him, dropping my gaze to the folio of papers between us, then back up to him. Aswan liked taking care of others, that much was obvious but… “You’ve never worked as a nanny, have you?” I asked quietly.

Suddenly his serious dark gaze swung back to mine. He placed his hands on the table in front of him and laced his fingers together. Then, taking a deep breath, he admitted, “No. But Sakkara thought I’d be good for you. For your family. ”

And I had to trust Sakkara. He was the father of Tova’s best friend, the husband—no, Mate to her teacher, and our town’s mayor. If he trusted Aswan…

You trust him too. You left your babies alone with him .

I did.

I guess I already trusted Aswan.

“You’re…” I lifted my gaze and made my decision. “You’re really good with them. You made the right calls with Joshy being sick. And Benny— Ben seems to like you. And Tova already loves you.”

His smile looked a little lopsided, a little relieved. “I like her too. I like them all. I think Ben just needs—” He clamped down on whatever words he’d been about to say and just repeated himself. “I like them all. But since I’ve never worked directly with kids before, I’m happy to take whatever certification—CPR, whatever—and background checks you need.”

That was a relief. “Yeah, I think that would be good, if you’re okay with it.” I opened the folio and began to sort through the files. “That was one of my questions. I was going to ask for copies.” I started sorting through papers, then passed him a pile. “Here, I’ll need you to fill these out so I can get you paid. And these”—I passed him the rest of the papers, tucked into the folder—“are your basic duties, outlined. Why don’t we—” A yawn interrupted me. “Oops, sorry.”

Aswan grinned as he sorted through them. “I think we’re probably beyond that, Hannah.”

The knowing look he shot me told me he remembered the tissues-in-the-nostrils incident, and I groaned and slumped against the back of my chair.

“I was hoping we could pretend you didn’t see me in my jammies and sick as a dog.”

“Hey, you needed my help, and I was glad I could be here.” His words were simple, but their meaning … I’ve never heard a guy say something like that. “And that’s what friends do for each other, right? Help out?”

Except…now that I was feeling better, I found myself thinking about Aswan in a way other than friendly . In a way other than the nanny I just hired .

And I didn’t think that was smart. “Okay, how about I give you a tour, and a quick rundown of stuff.” I pushed away from the table. “Then tonight you can go over the schedule and whatnot and be ready to start tomorrow.” My boss had made it clear my sick leave was over. “Summer schedules are more relaxed, but both older kids are taking classes at the rec center.”

Aswan also stood, although his attention was on the schedule I’d printed up. “Gymnastics and taekwondo. Useful skills, and Ben will benefit from the self-discipline.” One claw tapped against the page. “And swimming is vital for Joshua to learn—whichever timeslot you choose, I’ll make it work. What?”

When he lifted his gaze, I was likely gaping at him again.

“I’m sorry.” I shook my head and turned toward the living room. “I’m just not used to…um…having someone besides my parents. Have opinions about the kids and their future, I mean.”

“Your Mate must have had opinions. ”

I stopped suddenly enough that I must have surprised him, because when I turned back to frown up at him, Aswan was right there . And he didn’t back up, merely raised a brow, almost challenging me to answer.

Mate ? Travis had never been a Mate, a partner .

“My ex-husband isn’t part of our lives anymore.” There. That seemed sufficient. Except my mouth opened and more came out. “He left at the end of last summer. We’d been split, but he still lived with us.”

Aswan nodded solemnly. “Ben says he wasn’t the best role model.”

Benny had already spoken about his father? I snorted and turned back to the living room. “That’s an understatement. I have a no-food rule in here, but I’m not strict. Mainly it exists so I can give grief to whichever kid spilled whichever snack, so they clean it up immediately.” I’ve spent too many nights cleaning up spilled popcorn. “The T.V.’s smarter than me, but Tova and Ben can show you how to use it if you need help. Um…board games, books, Joshy’s toys…” I pointed to various cabinets, then turned toward the kitchen. “I guess you know your way around there pretty well already.”

What followed was the quietest—and speediest—house tour. I tried to focus on what he would need, so the upstairs tour was mainly of the medical supplies in the master bathroom, and I pointed out the kids’ spaces, figuring they’d show him their rooms when they were ready.

Back downstairs, we talked about the yard toys, what to expect, and what the kids had permission to do outside— basically anything, as long as they made good decisions and wore their helmets.

“Tova will likely spend most of the days with Emmy, either here or at Sakkara’s house. I think Nikki was going to take Emmy to school with her next week though, since she had in-service days.”

Without looking up from the notes he was taking, Aswan shook his head. “I can watch them both over here, if that’ll help Nikki. I’ll text Sakkara about it. Does Ben have local friends?”

“There are two boys across the street—nine and eleven. And a few in the cul-de-sac down the way, they all play basketball together. I think he was asking about going to the beach this week with a few of them.”

“And Joshua?” Aswan looked up and grinned. “Any playdates for him?”

With a sigh, I rubbed my forehead. “Honestly, am I a bad parent if I say no? He has friends at the daycare, but mostly he just hangs out with me as I run errands, and?—”

A large warm hand caught mine as the panicked guilt began to build, and my lips snapped closed. When I met his eyes, Aswan’s were concerned.

“You’re a great mom, Hannah. You’ve just had a lot to handle. And I’m here to help now, okay? I’ll get Joshua out and about, we’ll make friends, and I won’t let him grow up to become emotionally stunted or whatever. And he’ll be potty-trained before college.”

It was a silly vow, but I grinned in relief. “Promise? ”

He squeezed my hand. “Promise,” he whispered. He didn’t release me, but I felt him pressing the pad of his thumb into my palm. It felt so good, I almost moaned. Instead, I allowed the muscles in my fingers to go slack, and he continued to rub, even as he glanced down at his notes.

“This week, once you’re home, I’m going to try to set up some tours of rentable homes in the area. As long as you’re okay with that? I think I’d feel better if I had a place in the neighborhood, to be close by if you need me.”

Why did that make me go all warm and gooey inside? Maybe it was his touch.

“Uh…yeah. Wh-where are you living now?”

His grin was rueful as he shrugged, his fingers still making me melt. “The four of us who moved to Eastshore last month got an apartment together, because that’s all that was available. Ahkmin moved in with his Mate recently. My brother shares a room with me when he deigns to visit the island, with Tarkhan in the spare.”

Three orcs in one tiny apartment? “I can see why you’d want to move out.”

Aswan hummed. “I just hope I can find a new place to rent.” He glanced around my home. “Surely there are smaller houses than this?”

“Oh yeah,” I assured him, inching closer, hoping he’d continue the little palm massage. “Most of Eastshore’s houses were built at the same time, in the same design. Living space across the front, two bedrooms and two baths across the back. Some have additions.” I tipped my chin to point toward the stairs. “A second floor is rare, so when this one came on the market when the kids were little, I jumped on it. I wanted them to all have their own space, without having to worry about building an addition.”

He was studying me. “Your ex wasn’t particularly handy?”

“No,” I said flatly, glancing away. “He wasn’t.”

“Well, one of the smaller houses would be more than enough. I just need a bedroom and a kitchen to be happy, really, although a huge bed would be a plus.” I peeked at him to see him wink. “The double beds we’re in now aren’t long enough.”

Oh . Orc males were much bigger—in all directions—than humans. I found myself flushing again as I wondered how much bigger he was in other places.

Maybe he guessed the direction of my thoughts, because Aswan abruptly dropped my hand and stepped back, clearing his throat. “So, I’ll start looking?—”

I don’t know why I said it. I don’t know what I was thinking of. Maybe I was imagining him trying to sleep in a double bed, or thinking of that empty king-sized bed upstairs. Maybe I just didn’t want him to leave yet. Either way, before I could stop myself, I’d blurted it out.

“You can stay here.”

He blinked, and I hurried to explain. “We have an empty room upstairs. It’ll fit you—I mean, it’s nice and roomy. You’d be like…the live-in nanny.”

Aswan was still staring at me, his expression carefully neutral, and I plowed ahead, talking with my hands the way I did when I grew uncomfortable. “Only if you were okay with it, I mean. I’d have to look at the contract again because I guess it would mean your hours could be longer— although obviously we’d arrange your time off logically—but with room and board included?—”

“You mean it?” he finally rasped, his voice sounding almost painful.

I snapped my lips together and met his eyes. His dark eyes were…I swear I saw a desperate sort of hope there.

“Yeah,” I whispered. Then I licked my lips and tried again, louder. “Yes, if it’s suitable for you. We could take it on a monthly basis and reevaluate often. Once school starts, if you want to find a new place or a new job, I’ll understand?—”

I bit off my words again when Aswan thrust out his hand. “Thank you, Hannah. I would be grateful for the chance to be your live-in nanny.”

Moving automatically, I placed my hand in his, his large fingers enveloping mine once more. As if they belonged there. As if I belonged there.

“Good,” I whispered, staring down at our hands, and trying not to think of what those hands would feel like on my skin.

Shit. Maybe I did have a fever.

“I’d be happy to handle the grocery shopping,” he was offering, but I couldn’t focus. “I’ll order a car seat for my SUV, and a booster for Tova. We can go to the mainland for the better deals on the days they don’t have classes at the rec center. I’ll make up some menus—including healthy breakfasts—and we can work through them together.”

Vaguely, I had some realization that he was saying my kids’ cereal addiction wasn’t healthy, but I was too dazed to really care.

Aswan had just…stepped up. Stepped in , and not taken over, not really, but stepped up beside me. He was offering suggestions and thoughts and help . He was offering help when I needed it most.

I wondered if I was getting teary-eyed.

“Hannah?”

“Yep.” I squeezed his hand, then forced myself to drop it before I could melt under his touch any more. “That all sounds amazing. So…tomorrow at nine? I don’t have to be at work ‘til nine-thirty, so that should give us time…”

“I’ll be here at eight forty-five.” His smile looked…eager. Excited.

Excited to spend time with my kids. With me .

I pressed my fingertips to my cheek. Yeah, I think I was feverish. Or totally overwhelmed by this gorgeous male doing everything I’d ever dreamed of my prince charming doing.

Just wait ‘til he has to start on the potty training.

True.

Still…I couldn’t believe how lucky I’d gotten with Aswan.

And I couldn’t afford to do anything to screw it up.