Page 165 of My Monster’s Keeper

Again, I force my eyes to the ocean to stop from breaking into undignified giggles.

“This is our holiday. We earned it. Diablos says we can enjoy ourselves, get some sun, surf, relax.” I try to say it without laughing, but I can’t do it.

Frost nods his head along with my words. “I understand all of that, but this sand is awful. It’s getting in everything. I’d question the logic of trying to fuck in this.”

I snort a laugh that officially ends whatever facade I was trying to hold.

To be honest, I’m not enjoying it much myself. But it’s nice to know that I’m officially not a beach person. Looks like they were right when they said fish wasn’t for me.

“Why does this dog not have legs?”

I whip my head to the left, finding Puppy circling a poor, confused seal.

“It’s not a dog, Puppy, leave it alone.” Is that my frantic voice? Suddenly, nothing is funny.

The seal honks at him.

“Sounds like a dog.” Puppy dances around it.

Song warbles at the sea lion, the sea lion warbles back. I put my fingers to my forehead and wonder how stuff like this keeps happening.

“He says his name is Music, and he’s coming home with us,” Puppy shouts out.

“NO, he’s not!” The four of ussay back instantly.

Puppy laughs that evil laugh that normally means he’s getting his way.

“I knew the beach was a bad idea,” Wilder mutters.

“At least he’s holding the human form,” I say quietly.

“For now,” Frost growls. “Oh, look, I spoke too soon.”

I watch in resignation as Puppy, the giant and terrifying Grim, Song the equally disastrous Pitbull, and our soon to be new pet, the sea lion, dance and play with each other on the sand.

Diablos appears in front of us. Stix, Frost, and Wilder surge forward, blocking him from looking at me. I love that they appreciate a bikini.

“We’re on holiday,” I say cheerfully.

“Yes, you are, but there’s an interest- is that a sea lion? Does he know that it’s a wild animal? Puppy, cease playing with that sea lion this instant.”

I bite the inside of my cheek.

“Daddy Diablos, I’m waiting.”

What the ever loving fuck was that horror? I peer wide-eyed over my shoulder and find a blindfolded and bound Hartley with earmuffs over his ears. Naked Hartley. Ewww! In Shibari? Oh, lord, I do not need these images!

I snap my head back to stare at the spot between Stix’s shoulder blades. If I don’t look, it doesn’t exist, right?

Right.

“Leave the sea lion alone, Puppy!” Diablos thunders. “You can’t have it. It’s a wild creature.”

“Music loves me,” Puppy grumbles.

Oh, no, I don’t like that tone.

“Puppy, we’re going to go home and order in,” I say with divine inspiration. Like light shines down on me and choirs sing.