Page 9 of Monster’s Redemption (Monsters in the Mountains #9)
Blythe
D ays melted into each other until I wasn’t sure how long it had been since the start of my first heat. The evenings were still chilly, but not the bone aching cold it had been the first few days of my new life. The burning between my thighs eased, the bruises faded, and the mark on my neck healed.
Fin’hir thought I didn’t know what he’d done, but it wasn’t hard to figure out.
A mating mark tended by an alpha was usually healed by the time the omega’s heat ended. There was something in their saliva that repaired the tissue and prevented infection. Any other time, a wound like that would take a moon or more to seal and stop looking angry, and while mine lasted a few more days than was average for an omega’s heat, there was no way it would have been faded to a silvery scar if he hadn’t tended it.
I also knew how he kept me warm at night. I’d woken from nightmares to find his massive body pressed to my back, a thick arm pinning me in place. With the dark dreams I’d been having it should have terrified me to wake up to an alpha so close while I was vulnerable, but one breath of his honeysuckle and spice scent and I’d drift back off to nothingness.
And in the morning, he’d be gone.
I didn’t mention it. He clearly didn’t want me to know since he waited until I fell asleep to come lie with me, maintaining his little bed across the cave and the charade that he slept there.
I appreciated it more than I could show. I’d tried to thank him for it once, but his intense stare and the way his shoulders tensed and his fur rose had the words crumbling in my mouth. He wanted to be the big, bad monster, so I let his soft center be his secret.
Despite everything else healing, the ache in my chest remained. The nagging, ragged edges of the bond I’d never wanted reminding me of the moment I wanted to forget.
Fin’hir and I fell into a routine over time.
I would wake to an empty cave, stir up the fire and get dressed, and then Fin’hir would arrive with something for breakfast. Sometimes it was only the greens and berries he watched me collecting when he took me out into the forest, but usually there was some form of meat. He needed a lot of food to maintain himself, and he truly seemed to detest anything that grew from the earth. He helped show me there was little in the forest to fear if I paid attention to my surroundings, and I was determined to convince him that at least some greenery could be good.
“Is there any way to get more supplies? Could we trade with someone?”
I fingered the feathers of the bird he was cleaning. They would have been a good trade item back in my village, but I didn’t know if his kind found them valuable. I still didn’t want to return home, and I wasn’t certain I wanted him to take me to a different village either. A woman, especially an omega, showing up alone would raise suspicions.
Plus, it would put me back at the mercy of other alphas like Dicean.
“What do you need?”
He was trying to hide it, but I still caught the curiosity in his tone. I’d made do with nothing more than what I could make with what I found in the forest, but there were a few things I wanted to make life easier if it were possible to get them.
“A pot would help a lot. I could keep water in it here in the cave and use it for cooking. You wouldn’t have to hunt for me so much if I could make a stew.”
His head tilted, his horns catching the firelight and making him seem demonic. I had never been one to hold with the tales of witches and demons, but I also hadn’t believed in monsters, and one was staring into my eyes.
“An extra dress would be great too. And salt! A needle and thread… or even wool for me to make it from. That’s what I did back in my village.”
I knew he was curious about my home and life before he’d found me, but it was a subject he never brought up, and I appreciated it. The memories were tainted since most of them featured Ricarie or Dicean. I didn’t want to think about those times and the dreams I’d had before my life was changed.
“There might be a way.”
He said the words slowly, as if he was reluctant to consider the idea. I knew just as little about his past as he did mine, and I didn’t want him to do something he was uncomfortable with.
“It’s not that important. I’ve done just fine with what we have, so don’t worry about it.”
Fin’hir huffed as he turned his attention back to the bird.
“I may not know much about humans, but I’ve been around females enough to know better than to believe that. You wouldn’t have brought it up if it wasn’t important.”
My jaw dropped for a moment before I tried to deny his words.
“No, really. Yes, the stuff would be nice to have, but I can get by without it. If it’s trouble, then it’s not worth it.”
He huffed again before shoving a branch through the bird and putting it on the stand I’d made over the fire.
“We’ll go in the morning. I’ve been thinking about it anyway, and tomorrow will be as good as ever. The snows have melted enough to make the trip easy.”
Unsure what to say, I bit my lip and nodded. If he said it was possible and not too much trouble, I wasn’t going to argue with him.
“Should I save these feathers?”
I twirled one between my fingers, admiring the subtle pattern on it. The bird wasn’t uncommon, but I’d seen lovely things made from their feathers.
“For what?”
His brow was scrunched, the end of his nose wrinkled as if my question was strange. With how he was so efficient about not wasting any part of an animal, I didn’t know how he couldn’t think of a use for feathers.
“To trade with? Maybe someone would want them for a cloak, or the down for a pillow?”
He looked as if I’d suddenly started speaking a different language
“They can just go get the feathers from the bird themselves. And have a meal too.”
“Yes, but…” I paused then let out a sigh. It wasn’t worth arguing over. If he didn’t think we needed them, then I’d trust him as I did with everything else.
“Never mind. I’ll take them out.”
I would have been tempted to keep them myself, but I had no way to store them. I wasn’t going to be making a fancy cloak anytime soon, and I’d look foolish if I wove them into my hair the way I’d seen other girls do. Squirrels and other birds would make better use of them in their nests.
Thinking about the animals keeping their babies warm with the feathers had my hand dropping to my belly. I may have lost track of time, but I’d been with Fin’hir long enough to have my courses and know Dicean hadn’t bred me, and my emotions were a confused jumble over it. I didn’t want a baby by him, but sometimes, in the lonely moments when Fin’hir was out hunting and I was all alone, the thought of having a baby to care for made me ache. I still wasn’t sure I’d ever want another alpha, but I had always wanted children.
I sighed as I scattered the feathers in the waning light beneath the trees. I never wandered far from our cave without Fin’hir accompanying me, but I’d explored the area around the cave opening enough to know the best places to leave them for the animals to find.
Task complete, I lingered, listening to the breeze rustling the leaves overhead. It was quiet enough I could hear the scamper of small animals and the twittering of birds in the canopy as they prepared for nightfall. It was a difference to the village that never seemed to have a quiet moment, and it was one I’d come to appreciate.
Claws scuffed stone behind me, and I couldn’t stop the smile that lifted my lips. Fin’hir was always watching out for me, doing his best to make sure I felt safe.
“Come, little human, before the bird burns. You know what will happen if you leave me to tend it.”
The one time he’d tried to cook my meat before I’d awoken, he managed to char one side while leaving the other raw. He’d learned the meat had to be turned to cook it evenly, but it had become something of a joke between us.
My chest throbbed, the pain stealing my smile. There were times I could ignore the broken bond inside me, but it seemed like every time I managed to find a moment of happiness, it reminded me it was there.
Would I ever feel whole again?
Fin’hir’s eyes were filled with concern he would never admit to when he spotted me clutching my chest, and I forced my hands down to my sides. He’d done his best for me, saving me from a miserable life tied to a cruel alpha, and then taking me in when I refused to return home, so I didn’t want him to feel guilty for not getting to me sooner to save me from this pain as well.
Everything else from that day had faded with time, I could only hope the pain would too.