Page 26 of Mischief and Manors (Change of Heart #1)

CHAPTER 26

I awoke to the smell of rosemary and a pair of icy blue eyes.

It took several seconds and dozens of blinks to wholly absorb my surroundings. I was laying on my bed, and the window was open. The sky was dark—the only light coming from a nearby candle. The new sense of warmth from my blankets dispelled the prick of cold on my arms, and I noticed a dainty hand holding a jar of potent rosemary smelling salts beneath my nose.

The dainty hand and the icy blue eyes belonged to Miss Lyons.

“She’s awake!” The exclamation brought the sound of hurried steps to my ears. Mrs. Kellaway, Alice, the Everards, and two men I didn’t immediately recognize came into view. Then Charles’s dimpled grin and Peter’s twinkling eyes appeared above me like two precious gifts.

“You fell down.”

“And then you slept for a very long, long, long time.”

“And then your eyes just opened.”

I knew it was my brothers talking, so I laughed, even though I could hardly decipher their words. Slowly inching my arms to each side of me, I pressed myself into a sitting position, wincing from the unexpected pain in my ribs. My head throbbed, filling my ears with the sound of my heartbeat with every movement.

“How are you feeling?” This came from Mrs. Kellaway.

I found her face among the many peering down at me. I mustered a smile. “I have felt better.” I was struck with a wave of embarrassment at the amount of attention that was focused on me, especially in my current state. “But I will be all right. Thank you,” I added in a hurried voice.

Mrs. Kellaway put a gentle hand on my arm.

The older of the two men, I recognized as Mrs. Kellaway’s husband. I had only seen Mr. Kellaway once, ten years before, but his kind face was difficult to forget.

The younger man must have been their eldest son, Edmund. His eyes were striking, much like Owen’s. Much like Alice’s. His hair was darker than Owen’s, but he smiled just as easily as he observed my brothers. I hadn’t known the men were returning today as well, but it made sense. Almost the entire family was together again, which would be a suitable way to mark the ending of my time at Kellaway Manor. It was now very clear to me that I needed to leave. I had already drawn far too much attention to myself.

My quiet observations were halted by Mrs. Kellaway’s voice. “Annette, meet my husband and eldest son, Edmund. They arrived shortly after you fainted. They are eager to make your acquaintance, knowing you will soon be part of our family.” She patted my arm. “But of course, further introduction can wait until you are feeling well again.”

I wanted to faint again. I wanted to scream. Mrs. Everard needed to tell them the truth at once . I shot her a begging look, but she greeted it with a sly wink.

I had no idea how to react to that. My head hurt too much.

“Please rest, my dear.” Mrs. Kellaway patted my arm. “There is a tray of food on your desk. We will see you tomorrow.”

My eyelids were growing heavy again.“Will you keep Peter and Charles safe?” My voice was faint, but urgent.

She brushed the hair off my forehead, and my heart reeled at her motherly touch. “Of course.”

I relaxed, too numb to even feel the embarrassment I should be experiencing. Everyone left the room, and the last words I heard were from Peter.

“I love you, Annette.”

My heavy sheet of slumber didn’t split for even a moment until the bright sunlight of morning shone through my eyelids, bringing my mind to attention. How many hours had I slept? It seemed to be late morning.

After calling Lizzie, I dressed quickly and raced downstairs. I found my brothers with Mrs. Kellaway and Mrs. Everard in the library. Edmund sat nearby, watching me with a curious look. Surely he was wondering why Owen would have chosen me.

Catching a moment alone with Mrs. Kellaway would be more difficult than I thought, especially under Mrs. Everard’s watchful gaze. Where were Alice and Miss Lyons? Had they left? Had the plan worked already? If so, the ruse could end.

Peter and Charles ran to me, relief flooding their expressions. I needed to prove to them that I was feeling well again, and that they were the most important people in the world to me. I leaned toward them with a smile. “What would you like to do today, Mr. Atrocious and Mr. Mischievous?”

Charles seemed to respond more quickly than if I had called him by name, turning sharply and flashing me a grin. “Which one am I?”

“Hmm,” I mused, feigning deep thought. “You are certainly Mr. Atrocious.”

He smiled broadly, as if I had just flattered him beyond words.

“So I am Mr. Mischievous?” Peter asked with a grin.

“Well, of course you are, Mr. Mischievous.” I ruffled his hair. “And I would like to spend the entirety of this day with my two favorite little gentlemen.”

They laughed, and I almost sighed. It was just what I needed. I needed everything to be the way it used to be. I needed to spend all day with my little brothers and them alone. No wicked grandmothers, or haughty young ladies, or too-handsome gentlemen. My life was in control before I came here to Kellaway Manor. I knew who I was and what my sole purpose was—to care for my brothers. My heart had understood its duties and obeyed me. It had been strong.

But now, it was becoming frail and yielding. I needed to change that. I needed to make it understand what it must contain and what it could and could not feel. I needed to continue preparations for the future that Mr. Frampton had offered me. It was the only thing I could truly depend on.

So today, I was to start by reminding my heart of what was important. And that was Peter and Charles, because they occupied the only two seats in my heart and they always would. My attention had been too scattered; I had been neglecting them.

When I took them outside, my hopes were dashed immediately. Miss Lyons and Alice were in the orangery when I opened the door. A tea table had been set up in front of the bench.

Their conversation halted as soon as they saw me standing in the doorway.

“Miss Downing!” Alice smiled in greeting, casting a quick look in Miss Lyons’s direction. “Are you feeling well again?”

I suddenly wished I had taken longer with my appearance. Alice wore a pretty blue gown and lace gloves, with her auburn hair arranged flawlessly. Charlotte also wore blue, as if the two friends had coordinated their efforts.

“Yes, I am much improved.” I gave a polite smile. “I came to show my brothers the conservatory, but we will come another time.” I turned to leave, but Alice stopped me.

“No, you must join us!” She used her teacup and saucer to point at the empty space on the bench beside Miss Lyons. “You must try one of the lemon cakes. They have been a favorite of mine since my nursery days.”

I hesitated. It would be rude to decline, and Alice had given me no reason to be wary of her. I allowed my brothers to wander and look at the trees as I moved toward the bench.

“I have heard so much about you but have not spoken to you hardly at all,” Miss Lyons said, turning to me as I sat down. “You were the main subject at dinner last night. I must own that I am glad to finally have the opportunity to see what all the rage is about.” Her smile never reached her eyes.

I crossed my ankles with a laugh. I tried to keep my posture as straight as hers. “Oh, no. I don’t usually enjoy being the subject of any conversation.”

Miss Lyons reached for the cream pot on the tea table. She added three slow drops to her cup and took a miniscule sip. “You must be so very lonely in Silton. It would seem that you don’t have many friends, given your hapless situation.” She lowered her voice. “I heard a tale or two about your aunt. She sounds positively wicked! You poor, poor thing.”

Something about the tone of her voice settled uncomfortably in my ears. I cleared my throat to speak, but she continued.

“And you have not even been to Town! To be deprived of such an experience would render me utterly heartbroken. I cannot comprehend the longing you must have for a Season.”

I pressed my lips together until she finished speaking. “I don’t long for it. I find this part of the country rousing enough.”

Her eyes rounded and she looked at me in the way a teacher might look at a pupil. “Town is full of more wonders than you can possibly imagine. But I don’t expect you to understand its superiority over the countryside given your inexperience.”

My cheeks tingled with a hint of shame.

“When I am married, I hope my husband takes me straight to the shops on Bond Street,” Miss Lyons continued excitedly. “They are far superior to any others I have seen. Brighton is tolerable, but the selection is not nearly as impressive. I will buy parasols, fans, shawls, and all the lace and gowns I can afford. What do you think, Alice? Do you think my husband will allow me all these pretty things?”

Alice tapped her finger on her lap. “Perhaps.” They shared a smile. I stared at them with a furrowed brow. What were they plotting now? Had Charlotte set her sights back on Edmund? If that was the case, then Mrs. Everard’s plan wouldn’t work…Miss Lyon’s wouldn’t be leaving any time soon.

Alice’s expression turned inquisitive in my direction. “I’m curious about how your engagement to my brother came to be.”

My stomach flipped. “Oh?”

“Was it love at first sight? I do adore anything romantic.”

My eyes shifted to Miss Lyons who was listening intently. Heat spread on my cheeks. An opportunity to reveal Mrs. Everard’s scheme was hovering over me. Heart pounding, I tried to plan my confession in my mind. It would devour every last bit of my pride to tell Alice and Miss Lyons before Mrs. Kellaway, but I couldn’t invent a story just to continue the sham.

“Alice! You’ve made the poor thing blush!” Miss Lyons appeared to be barely concealing a catlike grin that could rival even her mother’s. “He undoubtedly stole your heart with endless flirtation and compliments. That is his way. Everyone knows it.”

I looked down, my heart sinking. Being called “poor thing” twice in one conversation was enough to cool my cheeks. “That is not what stole my heart.”

Alice’s face lit up with curiosity. “What was it then?”

There were too many things to add up, too many reasons. I couldn’t name just one thing, nor could I make a list that encompassed it all. The reason I loved him was the same reason Owen loved what he loved, and the same reason I felt so hopeless now. I had fallen in love with him because I couldn’t help it.

“Everything else,” I said finally.

Miss Lyons was very near glaring at me when I glanced her way again. Quickly, she cast me a smile. But I had seen the daggers.

“I wonder,” she said in a quiet voice, trailing off. She cleared her throat and arched an eyebrow as she stared at her cup. “I was just thinking . . . what have you to trade for the living Owen is providing you with at Willowbourne? I don’t wish to cause offense, but your family is practically unheard of. Remarkable, is it not, Alice?” Her eyes darted in my direction. “That he should choose to marry her for lack of all that?”

My cheeks tingled with heat once again. Alice shifted uncomfortably.

“It is astonishing that he should overlook so much for the sake of his heart.” Miss Lyons shook her head in false awe. She was very skilled at making one aware of one’s flaws. But I did not need assistance to recognize how inept I was. I no longer wanted to tell her about the fake engagement. I wanted her to think that I, even lacking so much, had still managed to win.

She took a bite of a lemon cake, pausing to chew. Her gaze settled on Peter and Charles. “You really should have left those boys with the maid. She has been employed to the task for a reason, and it is only a matter of time before they run you positively ragged.”

I stood, keeping my gaze fixed on her. “I would sooner be run ragged by your criticism, Miss Lyons. I have had enough for one day, thank you.”

Her eyes widened with unmasked shock. My skin buzzed in the aftermath of my retort. My ability to hold my tongue had been decreasing ever since my insult to Mr. Coburn. Perhaps it was time that I accepted that I was not fit to be a vicar’s wife.

Alice acknowledged me with a nod. I thought I saw an unspoken apology in her eyes. Stepping away from the bench, I took two lemon cakes from the tray to save for Peter and Charles.

There was one cake remaining, and Miss Lyons was staring quite possessively at it. So, in a sudden impulse, I swiped it off the tray from under her longing eyes. I was certain that she hated me even more now, but I wasn’t particularly fond of her either.

I released a tense sigh as I led my brothers out of the orangery. Anxious didn’t even begin to describe how I felt. The thought of Miss Lyons discovering the truth about the counterfeit engagement was enough to make my stomach heave. I could already imagine her laughing, leaning over to Alice and saying how she knew it was fake all along.

I found a large tree with plenty of shade, and played a game of charades with Peter and Charles. My mind wandered, though I tried my hardest to focus. I chased them across the grass, knowing full well Miss Lyons and Alice might see me on their way back from the orangery and call me improper. I didn’t care. Not anymore. We found three large sticks in the woods and used them as swords for fake duels, and for a moment, my worries faded. I laughed again, and by the end of the game, the weight on my shoulders felt much lighter.

After the game ended, we returned to the house for a drink of water. In the entry hall, a footman stopped me with two letters. My surprise blossomed into concern as I read the name on the first letter.

Mr. Martin Frampton

I held it against me, a tightness clutching my chest.

I hadn’t told Mr. Frampton my location. He would have no way of knowing that I was at Kellaway Manor, unless…

I swallowed hard, checking the name on the second letter.

Mrs. Ruth Filbee

My heart hammered in my chest as I opened Mr. Frampton’s letter first. The words leaped off the page, making my head spin.

Dear Miss Downing,

I hope you have been well during your time in Hampshire. Your aunt has informed me that you have made the decision to accept my proposal, and that you will be returning by the end of the month. I wanted to write to you for confirmation before I begin reading the banns in church and making wedding preparations in earnest. As your guardian, I assume her word is as good as yours, but please do correct me if that is not the case. I look forward to your return, and to our many wonderful years together.

With affection,

Mr. Frampton

My hands shook as I scrambled for Aunt Ruth’s letter. I tore the seal in one swift motion.

Annette,

How dare you not tell me that Mr. Frampton proposed? How dare you leave him awaiting your answer? He is the most eligible and respectable man in Silton, and you are fortunate indeed that he has not changed his course during your absence. You have caused him great distress, and I will not stand for it. You have disgraced me long enough. Therefore, I have accepted his proposal on your behalf.

Make arrangements with the Kellaways to return to Silton by the end of July, or I will come fetch you myself. Do not expect that you will ever receive another offer, and do not expect me to be accommodating if you choose to refuse him. The proposal has become the gossip of Silton. I cannot bear the scrutiny, and Mr. Frampton does not deserve such mockery. My guardianship over your brothers remains, and if you do not come back and marry Mr. Frampton, I will be sure to keep Peter and Charles apart from you in the future by any means necessary.

Do not rely on the Mrs. Kellaway to prevent this. I have the legal power to send your brothers wherever I please. If I hear that you have confided in the Kellaways, or if you resist in any way, I shall not hesitate to separate the three of you for as long as my guardianship prevails.

I braced myself against the wall. My entire body was weak, drained, and empty. A pain so acute threaded through my chest until I couldn’t draw a single breath. How had Aunt Ruth found out? I had asked Mr. Frampton not to tell her. Had it been Edith? Had the maid overheard the proposal or somehow seen the contents of my letter to him?

I gritted my teeth against the sudden emotion in my throat. This decision was supposed to be mine . Yes, I had been determined to do the sensible thing, but now I no longer had a choice. My eyes burned with tears.

Peter stared up at me. “What does the letter say?”

“Nothing.” I quickly folded both, holding them tight enough to cause them to crumple in my grip. I blinked fast to dispel the moisture in my eyes. My heart ached under the weight of what was now required of me.

Aunt Ruth’s chilling implications flooded me with terror.

Her threats were not empty. They were real.

If I did not marry Mr. Frampton, she would surely send my brothers to the London orphanage. If I married someone else, she would surely do the same, or keep them with her at Oak Cottage.

I couldn’t place any hope on Mrs. Everard’s belief that Owen cared for me. No matter who I married, my snub of Mr. Frampton would cause Aunt Ruth to take her revenge on my brothers. There was nothing I could do to stop her.

The end of July was less than a week away. I only had days remaining at Kellaway Manor.

A pang of grief made my eyes sting again. I took a deep breath, but it did nothing to dispel the pain inside me. There was no reason to wait until the end of July. If I could make my escape tomorrow, I might be able to avoid being caught in the fake engagement.

I might never have to see Owen again.

My heart protested the thought, but I shushed it. Marrying Mr. Frampton had been the plan all along. The only reason I was so distraught was because of Owen. He had complicated my perfect plan, and made me resent something that could have made me happy. I rubbed my nose hard, fighting the tears that threatened to break loose. It was better this way. Owen had distracted me from my brothers enough already, so there could be no place in my heart for him.

I looked down at the letters in my hands. They served an important purpose. They reminded me of my place, dragging me out of my romantic reveries and dreams. They were a harsh snap of a whip against my back, and Aunt Ruth held the reins.

I stood frozen for a long moment, debating what to do. If I was leaving the next day, there would be no need to write back. I would have to ask the Kellaways for a carriage and coachman, and they would likely try hard to encourage me to stay. I would have to be firm.

My mind refused to calm itself, but I had to pretend that nothing was amiss for my brothers’ sake. After a footman brought us a pitcher of water, I walked my brothers up the staircase.

“When is Dr. Kellaway coming back?” Charles asked, taking a gulp from his cup.

“Probably soon.” My stomach gave a rather hard plunge at the thought.

“How soon? Will it be very soon?” Peter asked from a few paces ahead.

“I don’t know.”

They stared down at the floor with looks of disappointment.

“Did you enjoy spending time with him?” I asked.

Charles nodded up at me. A thoughtful look broke over his features. “It’s like having a papa, I think.”

My heart fell. I felt suddenly adrift and broken. I had been thinking selfishly again. My brothers were going to have to leave without saying goodbye to Owen. I didn’t want to imagine how that would fragment their tiny hearts. They had grown too close to him. My heart thumped loudly as I remembered that I had too.