Page 26 of Midnight Bond (Wolves of Midnight #5)

JAGGER

The second she was in my arms, I knew it was over.

Scenting her heat for the past several minutes had been torture, but the agony of separating myself from her this past week had destroyed me.

Onyx had been inconsolable, and we’d both spiraled into a deep state of depression.

Even Mrs. Bailey’s daily updates on Brielle’s wellbeing hadn’t made me feel any better.

But now that she was in my arms, my reasons for staying away didn’t matter anymore.

Feeling her warmth. Hearing her breathe. Knowing that she was safe and secure. I couldn’t live without this. This was everything, and I wouldn’t let anyone separate us again.

Including myself.

She wasn’t unconscious for long, stirring awake with a groan as I carried her into the abandoned barn and secured the door. Her eyes opened, and when she realized where I’d taken her, panic fluttered through our bond.

“Jagger, no,” she moaned, weakly squirming in my arms. “You don’t want this.”

I firmed my grip on her, refusing to let go. “This was never about not wanting you, Brielle.”

“But you rejected me.”

“To protect you.”

“Then you should leave. I don’t want guilt sex.”

“Guilt sex?”

“Yeah, where you help me with my heat simply because you feel bad for making my life hell. But I’m not interested in a one-time thing with you, Jagger. If you want to protect me from yourself, then don’t have sex with me out of guilt. That will only make this ten times worse.”

“But you need me right now, more than you need my protection.”

She barked a laugh that sounded more like a sob. “I’ve needed you for the past couple of weeks. Hell, for the past year.”

At her confession, my legs almost gave out on me.

Struggling to keep it together, I continued searching for an acceptable spot to set her down.

“Your need stems from the soulmate bond. Its very purpose is to create a pull that encourages two souls to become one. But fate shouldn’t have chosen you for me.

Soulmates are supposed to complete each other, to be each other’s safe space, but I can’t be that for you. I’ll only ever hurt you.”

“Jagger, put me down.” I glanced down to find her emerald eyes flashing up at me in anger. “Now.”

Despite how thin and frail she felt, her voice was steady.

Strong. Every molecule in my body demanded I keep her close, but I forced myself to gently set her down anyway.

When her feet hit the dusty floor, she immediately hunched over, eliciting a pained groan.

Fresh pheromones wafted into the air, and I reached for her again, unable to help myself.

“No,” she said, shoving my hands away with surprising strength.

The action caused her to stagger sideways, but she caught herself on a wooden support beam.

Pausing a moment to catch her breath, she finally straightened and looked me dead in the eye before saying, “You think a predestined bond is controlling how I feel? Well, you’re wrong.

Sure, I initially felt a pull toward you, but since then, I’ve gotten to know you. To understand you.

“Family means everything to you. Your loyalty and devotion belong to them. You’ll give your life for them,” she continued, her words picking me apart piece by piece.

“You’re grateful to the Rivers family for accepting you when no one else would, but a part of you is terrified they’ll reject you like your old pack did.

Because of that fear, you won’t let anything jeopardize your place in Midnight Pack, including a soulmate bond.

You would rather give up your own dreams than risk losing the family that found you.

“That sacrifice is noble. Honorable even,” she went on, her voice impassioned.

“But I won’t accept it. I want a mate and family of my own, and although you swore never to pursue a female again, I know you want the same things.

You want me. It’s why you’ve been protecting me all this time, why you’ve been watching and following me.

So have me, Jagger. Stop punishing yourself and take what you want.

Stop protecting me from yourself. I don’t want or need to be protected.

I know you, and even with an untamable wolf inside you, I know you won’t hurt me. ”

My very soul felt exposed, mercilessly flayed open as she dug into the deepest darkest parts of me and dragged them out into the light.

Feeling raw and vulnerable, I took a step back, then another.

“You don’t know what you’re saying.” My voice came out gruff, scraping against my throat like sandpaper.

“I already have hurt you. I rejected you.”

“But did you really? Would we still be able to feel each other’s emotions through the bond if you had? It hurt like hell when I thought you’d never come for me again, yet here you are, prepared to help me with my heat. That means something, Jagger.”

“Yes, it means that I care about you,” I snapped.

“It means that I selfishly want you, even if it would destroy everything. I’ve dreamt of having a mate and family of my own for a decade, Brielle, but that dream died the moment I almost ruined a female.

It would kill me if I hurt you like that. I can’t hurt you like that.”

“You won’t.”

“You don’t know that!” I thundered, so loudly that I expected her to cringe back in fear. She didn’t.

“Yes, I do,” she said, a calm certainty filling her voice.

“When you realized I was your soulmate, you were willing to sacrifice your future in order to protect me. You suffered in silence for over a year while living under the same roof as me. I can’t think of any other male who would practice that kind of self-restraint. ”

I shook my head, unwilling to accept the version of me she saw. “I’m too unstable. Too dangerous.”

“So am I,” she tossed back. “You’re not the only one with an unpredictable wolf, you know. I’m not afraid of Onyx, and I’m most certainly not afraid of you.”

I began to tremble, the protective walls I’d built around my heart starting to crumble. “You shouldn’t want me, Brielle. I’m broken.”

At that, she let go of the beam and took a step toward me. “No, not broken,” she said, her voice gentling. “Just different.”

All the air left me in a rush. When she took another step, my heart started to hammer. Onyx reared up, sensing a change in the air. In me. His eagerness fueled my own, and blood rushed to my groin, hardening my cock within seconds.

“Come any closer, and I’ll take you,” I warned her, my voice both breathless and guttural.

“Good. I want you to. Even if you reject me again afterward.”

Shocked that she still wanted this, wanted me, even after everything I’d put her through, I decided to be honest right back. “I won’t. If we go through with this, I’ll never let you go, even if you want me to.”

“I won’t want you to,” she firmly said, and Onyx howled in glee.

I nearly joined him, my control slipping with each encouraging word she uttered.

The wildness inside me was emerging, no doubt flaring hotly through my eyes, but she didn’t seem to care.

“You’re my soulmate, Jagger. My family. I’m safe with you. ”

She took another step. A final step. Then lifted her hand and placed it over my thundering heart, nothing but trust brimming in her eyes.

The decisiveness. The willingness. The surrender pouring through our bond and into me was the last straw.

“Screw it,” I muttered and finally gave in. Finally surrendered to the desperate need to pursue my soulmate, to take her like I’d dreamt of doing from the very first moment I’d laid eyes on her.

Yanking her against me, I captured her mouth in a scorching kiss.