Page 16 of Mail-Order Brides Wishes (Montana Mail-Order Brides #7)

Chapter Nine

G uilt stung Bryn’s cheeks as she bolted to her feet. She’d neglected her responsibility to watch Susie. Again. Though in her defense she thought the grove of trees posed no danger to the child.

Flint was ahead of her as they rushed to where the sound had come.

Susie stood in dappled light, her hand outstretched, screaming like she’d been stung by a hornet.

Bryn caught her hand and examined it, but could see no swelling. “Susie, what happened?”

Susie blinked her eyes and choked back a sob. “I caughts a bug. I wants him for a pet but he flied away.” Another bitter cry.

Her heart breaking for the child’s sorrow, Bryn lifted Susie and held her tight. “Hush, now. It’s all right. Bugs don’t like to be pets.”

Susie shook with sobs that came from the very depths of her being.

Over the loud cries, Bryn spoke to Flint. “I think she’s overwhelmed. Like I said, there will be times things are simply too much to bear.”

Susie’s sobs grew quieter, and she squirmed to be put down. She went to Flint and held out her arms for him to pick her up.

He lifted her, his arms stiff. His mouth worked— whether of surprise or confusion Bryn couldn’t say.

Susie leaned her face to his shoulder and sighed as if she’d found a safe shelter.

Bryn’s eyes stung with tears as Flint awkwardly patted Susie and then slowly relaxed, cradling her tenderly. Sweetly.

The three of them stood for a bit and then Susie got down.

Flint rubbed his forehead. “Maybe we should go home.”

“No!” Susie’s face crumpled up, preparing for more tears. “I’s having fun.”

Flint looked to Bryn for her opinion. She shrugged. “As long as you don’t cry.”

Susie nodded and trotted off.

The warm sunshine and cool shade invited Bryn and Flint to wander along the edge of the trees. Suddenly, she stopped.

“I don’t hear Susie.” She studied the surroundings.

“Look.” Flint pointed toward the wagon.

It took a moment for Bryn to locate what he meant. Susie lay on the quilt.

“Think she’s sleepin’.”

They moved closer and as soon as Bryn was sure Susie was indeed sleeping, she huffed out her breath.

As if startled by her noisy release of air, Flint turned. “Somethin’ botherin’ ya?”

“I can’t help but worry about her. What if I let something bad happen to her? Fail her in some way?” It was the first time she’d admitted, even to herself, the concerns that nibbled at her thoughts.

Flint closed the distance between them but did not touch her and she coiled and uncoiled her fingers to stop herself from reaching out to him.

Drawing strength and comfort from him. She should be able to handle this on her own.

But frankly, she was tired of having to be responsible for everything.

Besides they were now married. She was half of a team. Shouldn’t that count for something?

“Seems to me.” Flint’s voice was soft, like a whisper that wasn’t a whisper. “We can only do our best. Then trust God for the rest.”

Her throat tightened. Her eyes burned. She nodded. “It’s all we can do.”

“Don’t be forgettin’ that ya aren’t alone now. I’m here ta help.”

Bryn kept her gaze lowered though he must have heard her swallow. “Thank you,” she managed.

“Do ya want ta wake her?”

“A sleep will do her good.” Her head came up. “Unless you are in a hurry to leave.” His eyes held the color of the washed-out sky and the warmth of the bright sun.

“Got no place to be ’cept right here. If’n we sit here we can see little Susie and not disturb her.” He nodded to the nearby trees.

“I’d like that.”

They sat side by side, each of them leaning against an accommodating tree trunk. Bryn curled her legs to one side and spread her skirt to protect her modesty. She tipped her head back, watching the wispy clouds hanging in the sky, and let peace and contentment flow through her.

The grass bent before Flint’s boots as he stretched out his legs. “Were ya lonely as a youngster?”

The question touched buried memories. She’d have to open the door to those memories in order to answer truthfully.

Not long ago, she would have dismissed the idea and kept the door locked fearing that her worries and concerns would be ignored.

But she’d already told him that her father rejected her because she was female.

Now other buried memories pressed forward.

“There were days I envied my friends going home from school to play with brothers and sisters.” Her voice dropped.

“I’d seen them greeted by their mothers.

” Her breath quivered in and out. “I went home where I was told to be quiet and go play in my room. So yes, I guess I was lonely. I used to daydream about my father taking me home where I could play with my little sister. She was eight years younger but the few times I saw her when she was little, I enjoyed being with her. She’d show me all her treasures and tell me stories about her toys. ”

“Were ya not allowed to visit?”

“Not at first, but by the time—” She’d almost said Rowena’s name. “My sister had grown to school age, our father no longer had anything to do with her, so I spent time with her.”

“That’s good.”

“It was. Then I left to attend college in Philadelphia, paid for by my grandparents, and saw very little of her until I came back three years ago to nurse my grandparents. Susie was born just after I returned.”

“Seems ya might have finally got the family ya wanted.”

His observation was so accurate she gave a little laugh.

“That’s exactly what I thought. But then—” Her throat closed off and she couldn’t continue.

Just when she thought she and Rowena could forge a solid friendship and become the family they both longed for, Rowena had gotten pneumonia and never recovered.

Flint’s hand closed over hers. Warm and reassuring. “Bryn, I’m sorry ya lost yer sister.”

She turned her hand to his and held on, a lifeline against the overwhelming swell of sorrow and sadness that often came her way. “Thank you. It gets easier.” Moving away from her past helped. Or did she mean, marrying a man like Flint did?

They sat in contented silence. He pointed to a hawk circling overhead.

Rustling came from behind them. Too loud to be solely the wind. And then it grew louder. Did she hear an animal snort?

Were they about to be attacked?

Flint heard the noise. Knew Bryn had too and was about to bolt. He tightened his grip on her hand making it impossible for her to get free without a struggle.

“Stay. Be still.” He pulled his legs up, prepared to spring into action if he needed to but otherwise, they were safest if they didn’t startle whatever was making that noise.

The sound came again, and he tensed. And then a big buck whitetail deer emerged into the opening to their right.

It stopped, his head high as he sniffed unfamiliar visitors.

He stared at the wagon and then slipped back into the trees, hardly stirring a leaf as he made his escape.

Flint’s muscles remained ready for action until he was certain there was no more danger. He eased back and relaxed his grip on Bryn’s hand though he didn’t release it. “He was pretty surprised someone's here.”

“We’re safe now?”

He edged closer so his shoulder pressed to hers.

Offering encouragement. “We’s safe.” He was pretty certain she leaned toward him.

It was a nice feeling. Thinking she trusted him.

Maybe even needed him. He’d had the same feeling last night.

Like the Bible said, the two becoming one. Nothing between them.

Her arm and shoulder softened as she relaxed.

Everything was good. Safe. Maybe she’d settle back and continue talking about her life back east. He liked hearing about her early years.

Strange she never mentioned her sister’s name but then it might hurt too much to do so.

Some day he’d ask but not now. No point in spoiling the contentment between them.

“Tell me more about your childhood,” she said.

“Ain’t much to tell. I worked as cook’s helper for a couple of years.

By then I had growed some and the trail boss told me to get on my horse and do some real work.

” Amusement brought a chuckle. “Ridin’ after cows was a whole lot easier than jumpin’ to try and please the cook.

When that outfit broke up, I got a job workin’ for another.

Went from job to job. Now I got my own place.

” Would she detect the catch in his throat?

“Thanks to you I now have my own home too.”

“Reminds me of a verse I heard a time or two. ‘The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He maketh me ta lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters.’ The preacher said it meant God gives us peace and safety. I kinda think that sometimes it means He gives us a home where we are—” He didn’t know what he meant to say though the word love had sprung to his mind.

“Valued?”

“That sounds about right.” Though in his head there was much more. Things he didn’t have words for. Didn’t want to give words to for fear he’d be disappointed if he admitted them. Safer to take what was and enjoy it.

“It’s part of the Twenty-Third Psalm.” She said the rest of it, the words like honey to his heart. Sweet, healing, soothing, and promising.

The words fell into silence, and he let them sit undisturbed for a few seconds. “I like that.” He squeezed her hand and pressed his shoulder a little closer. They were alone. Would she welcome a kiss in the middle of the day?

“Me too. Mrs. Blake said my mother found great comfort in those words. When I said I’d like to remember it for Ma, she helped me learn it by heart.”

The sun’s rays poked through the trees and almost blinded him with brightness. Made him realize how late it had become. If he was going to do what else he planned, he needed to get at it.

“Do ya think Susie is old ’nough for a pet?”

Her chuckle barely disturbed the birds in the leafy branches overhead. “Are you thinking of catching some bugs and taking them home for her?”