Page 39 of Magpie

I don’t know how long I remain in the hallway, a motionless body on the floor. The ashes in the air, Sean’s ashes, have long since settled, and still, I don’t move.

I can’t.

If I move then I have to accept it, accept that he is gone.

Accept that I will be forever locked away in this house, in this prison.

I can’t get Sean’s voice out of my head, telling me to run, to get as far away as I can.

I close my eyes tightly, pressing down the tears that threaten, pressing through the tightening in my throat.

I could stay here forever, a living statue embedded in the floorboards, but as the sorrow ebbs to a dull ache, I’m beginning to listen to that voice, the one that whispers about a life before.

The voice that whispers about Maggie . As I listen, the first inkling of understanding about what has been taken from me takes root and starts to grow.

Then, I begin to do something I haven’t truly done since waking in this house.

I begin to feel .

And I feel fucking furious.

A white-hot fire is consuming me, and I shake with it. Clenching my hands into tight fists, I find the strength to sit up, find the strength to do something . Hatred sizzles off me like heat from the sun, and I am surprised I haven’t lit the floor on fire with the power of my rage.

I hear movement above me, bangs and crashes as Alister tears through his bedroom like a thunderstorm. His anger is palpable, but mine is a wildfire that will not be controlled.

I will not be controlled.

Standing slowly, I turn and make my way to the stairs.

I’m an inferno as I climb them steadily, continuing until I stand outside the door to Alister’s bedroom, not even flinching as he throws something against it.

His tantrums don’t scare me, not anymore.

Without pausing another moment, I twist the handle and push the door open.

His back is to me. He’s removed his jacket, and I see it tossed in a heap on the floor. His hair is a wiry mess, and I know he’s run his hands through it in frustration. He stills but doesn’t turn as I walk into the room.

“I know tonight was difficult for you.”

I let out a sharp bark of laughter. His words are like a slap in the face, and they only fuel that hot anger inside of me.

His shoulders slump as he lets out a deep sigh, like I am being the unreasonable one.

He turns to me with that same possessive expression he wears when he tells me everything he does is for my own good.

A facade of kindness crosses his eyes as he walks toward me.

“In time, you will understand that I did it all to protect you. You were too attached to him; he was drawing you away from your true calling.”

He reaches out to touch my cheek, and I slap his hand away, glaring at him. His eye twitches, a flash of anger breaking through the fake concern.

I want to rip that expression off his face and shred it.

“I hate you,” I spit, my voice ringing out in the quiet of the room. I watch him fighting against himself, trying to cling to the mask of gentle comfort, the mask of the protector. The mask of a fucking liar .

“You are just confused,” he croons, his voice soft and caring. He attempts to take my hands in his.

I spin out of his grip, hurry away from him, hugging myself tightly as I all but shout, “I am clear-headed for the first time in a very long time.” I begin to shake as my rage courses through me.

“You stole him from me.” My voice is barely above a whisper now.

Alister opens his mouth to speak, a placating look in his eyes, but I cut him off by screaming, “You stole everything from me!”

He doesn’t so much as flinch. In fact, he scoffs, the false kindness falling from his face and at last revealing a hateful sneer.

“I gave you the world, you ungrateful little bitch ,” he snaps, taking three quick strides and closing the gap between us.

I hold my ground just like I’m holding his gaze, undaunted by the presence of him.

The sight of my defiance only makes his grimace deepen, his beautiful features contorting into a revolting expression.

He grabs my face, his fingers digging into my cheeks as he yanks me forward until his forehead is touching mine.

His eyes are feverish and wild as he snarls, “I saved you from the miserable existence you were wasting away in. Your life was unremarkable. Your life was nothing .”

“But it was my life,” I shout, pushing him away from me, even as his nails dig deep grooves into my cheeks, leaving a searing pain in their wake. I stumble away from him, but he is faster, grabbing my wrist and yanking me back before I can get far.

“Your life was always destined to be mine,” he growls, his voice dark and smoky, trying to wrap around me and confuse my senses.

Shaking my head, I push against him and stumble away.

I turn my back to him and hug myself as I say, “I’m leaving.

I don’t care what I promised. I don’t care what you think I owe you.

I’m done giving myself to you—you certainly already took more than enough.

I’m done with this, Alister. I’m done with you. ”

There is a deafening silence in the wake of my speech. Then Alister lets out a sarcastic laugh, the sound sharp and grating. He walks up behind me and places his hands on my shoulders, pressing down.

“You’re not going anywhere ,” he hisses in my ear, gripping my neck tightly, holding me fast to him with his other arm as it pins my back against his chest.

“You cannot keep me locked up here forever.”

He laughs again, the sound vibrating through me as he nuzzles his head into my neck. I squirm against him, and he grips my throat tighter, making it nearly impossible to breathe.

“I can do anything I want with you. Do you know why, Magpie?” When I don’t answer, he turns my neck, moving me like a puppet to shake my head.

“No? Well, let me tell you, pretty bird .” I stifle the urge to scream when he calls me that name.

I will not give him the satisfaction of a reaction.

“It’s because I own you, Magpie. Your life is not yours , not after you so willingly gave it to me. ”

“You tricked me,” I shout, unable to hold my tongue any longer as I yank myself out of his grip, spinning around and glaring at him. “There is no way you told me this is the life I was signing up for. I would never have agreed to that.”

“Can you be so sure? Do you even remember a single thing about yourself? Do you even remember what you look like?” Alister’s smile is a cruel mockery as I open my mouth, then quickly snap it shut.

“No? Let me help,” he sneers. He grabs my shoulder and yanks me to the full-length mirror in his bedroom, shoving me in front of it. “Tell me what you see, Magpie.”

“Stop it,” I hiss, unable to hold the shifting, swirling gaze of my reflection. It’s unsteadying to look so plainly at something and not be able to drink any of it in.

“You can’t tell me, because you do not exist, Magpie. You gave that existence to me,” he shouts, slamming his hand against his chest.

I whirl around to face him, unable to stomach the look of my reflection. “I intend to get it back,” I hiss, turning and storming out of the room. He doesn’t attempt to stop me; I assume because he thinks I’m too weak to try to leave him.

I can’t help but wonder if he’s right.

It never occurred to me before to leave the House, to leave Alister.

If I’m being honest with myself, I didn’t want to.

I hate my lessons, yes, and I’ve grown detached from Alister, but never once has the idea to run sprouted in my mind.

There is comfort in the numbness, a familiarity in it.

But now that the idea of leaving has taken root, I find there is no digging it out.

Storming into my room, I rush over to my dresser and grab a bag, throwing it onto my bed as I decide what I want to take with me.

Pausing, I look around the room. Books, baubles, and trinkets line the shelves, and a pile of black dresses is strewn about the floor.

None of it calls to me. Nothing except the book tossed haphazardly on my side table.

A small journal, filled with scrawled notes from Sean.

Any time Alister was using me for a lesson, Sean would spend the time writing in it.

Reading his words, which I now know to be the evidence of his love for me, was the light that led me out of the darkness.

I realize all at once there isn’t a single thing in this house that I want to take with me besides this book.

Then it dawns on me.

My key .

My mind fills with the image of the two halves of Sean’s key, snapped in half by Alister. He severed Sean’s connection to him, and to the eternal youth that connection brought.

I am such a fool.

Of course no one leaves the House. They can’t. Because Alister holds everyone’s key in a place none of us can reach, and as long as he has your key, he owns you.

My eyes fall on my desk, resting on the various items strewn across it. Including a serrated dagger. I step slowly forward. My hand traces the blade, the edge deadly sharp.

I slowly curl my fingers around the cold steel handle.

It’s long into the night before I hear him walking down the hallway that leads to my room.

I’m in bed, my back to the door, but I haven’t slept a wink.

The door opens with a soft creak, and he steps slowly toward me.

I’m staring straight ahead at the wall, my entire body taut.

The bed shifts as he sits on it, his hands running gently through my hair. I stiffen against his touch.

Noticing it, he whispers, “I am sorry for hurting you, Magpie, but I know one day you will see that I did it to keep you safe. To keep us safe.”

It takes everything in me not to shake, but I grip the handle of the knife tighter.

“It is a pity to lose Sean.” I nearly shout at him for daring to speak his name.

“He was a great asset to me, but ultimately he tried to take you away from your true purpose, and I couldn’t allow that.

” Alister’s voice is soft and caring, like he is giving condolences at a funeral.

I want to rage, to scream, to do anything to block out the sound of it, the feel of his fingers trailing through my hair.

He disgusts me. How I ever felt peace in his arms is something I will never understand.

“You stole him from me,” I breathe, my voice breaking. I am surprisingly calm as all my senses zero in on this moment.

“Magpie,” Alister sighs.

I speak over him, my voice strong. “You stole everything from me, Alister. My life, my family, my past. You stole it all. You devoured it, until nothing of me remained.”

He has the decency to not deny it, but his hand has stopped stroking my hair.

I can feel the anger and frustration at my continued defiance beginning to radiate off him.

He expects me to crawl into his arms, to let him coddle me, to let him use me.

What a blind woman I once was to find comfort in the lies of his embrace.

“Yes,” he says, shocking me by speaking at last. “Yes, I took the things you no longer wanted. The things you were only too happy to throw away for a life with me. I didn’t steal anything, Magpie. You gave it to me.”

I close my eyes, breathing in deeply. I cannot remember Maggie, cannot pull the memories of her to my mind. But I will never believe that she agreed to be used to endlessly feed the insatiable hunger of his soul.

“She may have given you her life, Alister,” I say, slowly sitting up in bed, “but I’m taking it back.”

In a flash, I spin, raising my hand high above my head and plunging the knife into his chest with the strength of my rage. And that strength is vast .

He lets out a wet, startled gasp, tumbling back off the bed with the force of my attack.

I fall with him, landing on top of him as I press the knife even deeper into his chest. He tries to dislodge me, but he is coughing, choking on his own blood.

I waste no time and saw a jagged gash across his chest. Tossing the knife aside, I press my hands on either side of the gash and peel them apart.

Alister lets out a gurgled scream as I open a gaping wound in his chest, staring down at the void where his heart should be.

“M-Magpie,” he stutters, coughing around the blood that spurts from his lips.

I hold his eyes for one moment, forcing the fire of my hatred into my gaze as I say, “My name is Maggie.”

Putting my hand deep in the wound, I begin to search.

It’s storming, covering the streets in cold sheets of rain.

Wind gusts through the city, sending the rain pelting into my face as I run down the road.

I am soaked to the bone, the black dress clinging to me.

My bare feet scrape on the hard concrete as I sprint down an endless series of sidewalks and streets.

I don’t know how long I run for, or even where I’m going, taking twists and turns at random.

My mind is racing alongside my feet as I try to put as much distance as possible between me and the House.

I’m about to give out from exhaustion, my body numb from the rain, my mind numb from the events of the night.

I’m staggering at a slow pace, swaying on my feet.

The rain has stopped, but I am still dripping a trail behind me as I trudge on.

More and more people are taking to the streets, and for the first time that I can remember, they notice me .

People stare wide-eyed at the shoeless woman in a short black silk dress, soaking wet and looking like she’s about to pass out.

Deciding I’m too weary to interact with anyone, I slow and turn into an alley, hiding behind a dumpster.

I slide to the ground, my legs finally giving out underneath me.

Closing my eyes, I lean my head against the brick wall behind me, feeling the first rays of the sun touching my face as it rises fully in the sky.

I open my eyes and look up, squinting against the blinding sun. I feel like I’m seeing it for the first time.

Peeling my tired gaze away from the bright sky, I look down at my hands. They are clasped tightly in front of me, Alister’s blood rinsed off them long ago, yet I can’t shake the feeling that they will always be tainted.

I open my hands, staring at the black key. The one with the bird in flight on the handle.