Page 36 of Magpie

I t started as a seldom occurrence, my training with Alister.

The effort of whatever spell I did to fuel him was too great, too taxing.

It left me withered and hollow in its wake.

Sometimes it would take weeks, or even months, for me to fully recover.

After my lessons, Alister would leave me alone to tend to myself, and I spent more and more time in Sean’s room.

He would hold me through the nightmares that woke me, shaking and sobbing, with no memory of why I felt so viscerally wrong .

Sean would whisper in my ear when I needed to be talked to and hold me, silent but steady, when I couldn’t stomach words.

Sean is always there for me when I need him, and Alister is always there the moment he needs me.

My lessons might have started few and far between, but Alister is insatiable and impatient, and the very second he believed I was ready for another, he would seek me out.

I began to learn to distrust him and his whispered words that I wasn’t doing anything wicked, that I was merely a witness on this journey.

Even as the memories of those journeys dripped from my mind, consumed in Alister’s flame, the feeling of unease remained, growing bigger and louder with each lesson.

Alister told me I would grow stronger, that I would get used to the foreboding sensation that held me in its talons.

He was wrong that I would become accustomed to it, but he was right that I would grow stronger.

Which only made him push me harder.

Soon he was training me every month, then every other week, then weekly.

Now it’s twice a week, an effort that is proving to be my biggest challenge.

I find it nearly impossible to stand for long periods of time, becoming winded from the slightest task.

More often than not, Sean finds me a crumpled mess on the ground after I’ve collapsed in a heap during my restless wanderings of the House.

He is almost always by my side, sick with worry, trying to tend to me and to help chase away the gripping dread that is my constant companion.

Outside of our lessons, I barely see Alister anymore.

When he first started ignoring me, I thought I would hate it, that I’d crave the warmth his touch provided.

But I’ve found that over the years, my desperate pull toward Alister has drifted away.

I no longer yearn for him, pulled like a moth to his flame.

That feeling has been replaced with a sullen resolve to obey, no matter how viciously I don’t want to.

My once addicted fascination with him has faded to apathetic resignation.

Alister doesn’t seem to notice the change in me, or more likely simply doesn’t care.

That’s fine by me. The less he notices me, the better.

Besides, all my time away from him is spent in Sean’s embrace.

“I don’t like how much he’s pushing you,” Sean says, pulling me close to him.

We’re tucked into his bed, where he brought me after finding me curled up in a corner, sobbing quietly after my most recent lesson.

He silently scooped me into his arms and walked me to his room.

I kept weeping, consumed by the sensation that there was blood on my hands, that I desperately needed to scrub them clean.

He held me as I sobbed and begged to rinse the blood away, holding me tight as he walked me into his shower and gently set me, fully clothed, under the stream of water.

He peeled my wet clothes off me, dropping them on the ground and beginning to scrub me entirely.

He soaped up every inch of my body, the act tender and gentle.

There was nothing sexual about it. He was only focused on cleansing me.

I wept through it all.

When the last of the suds were rinsed down the drain, he wrapped me in a towel before scooping me up and walking to his bed.

I watched him step out of his own soaked clothes, dropping them unceremoniously on the ground, completely unbothered by the wet pile.

He only had eyes for me, only cared about me.

My tears finally stopped, but the aching cold in my chest left me shivering and raw.

Sean crawled into bed next to me, pulling me on top of his chest and sitting in the grief-stricken silence with me.

I rest my head on his bare chest now, listening to the soft, rhythmic sound of his heartbeat.

I close my eyes, breathing in the scent of him as I try to let some of his peace fill me.

I don’t respond to his words, letting them die in the air between us.

What could I even say? I don’t like how Alister is pushing me either, but we both know there is no denying him. No stopping him.

“It’s killing you,” Sean says, not letting me hide from this. I have seen this conversation coming for weeks now, could read it like a book in his eyes every time he found me consumed by sorrow after my lessons.

I turn my face to his, forcing a smile to my lips. “You know as well as I do that nothing can kill me.” I say it like a joke, meant to defuse the situation, to get him to change the subject, but the look in his eyes has the fake smile sliding off my face.

“Magpie, I think you need to leave,” he says.

My heart drops as I let out a strangled sob. “You want me gone?” I whisper, and he quickly shakes his head, cupping my cheek and pressing his lips to mine. The kiss is deep, and full of so much bitter longing I nearly drown in it.

He pulls back. “I never want to be apart from you. I cannot imagine the rest of this endless life without you, but I cannot continue to watch you waste away in front of me. Alister is going to use you up until there is nothing left, and I’m not going to let him.

” He holds my face fiercely, his eyes intent on mine.

“I love you, pretty bird, but it’s time to set you free. ”

I barely have time to register his proclamation, much less react to it, before he is pulling us off his bed. I have a drawer of things in his room, and he pulls out one of my many simple black shift dresses, handing it to me before he moves to dress himself. I’m staring at him, transfixed.

I love you, pretty bird.

“I love you, too,” I whisper, standing naked before him, holding the dress tightly in my hands.

He’s buttoning a white dress shirt, but his fingers still at my words. He slowly turns. He gives me that crooked smile that I love so much, then walks over to me and tilts my chin up, snaring me in his ruby gaze.

“I know, pretty bird. Which is exactly why I need to get you out of here.”

I swallow hard, but nod, because he’s right. This house, my lessons with Alister—they are killing me. Not the final kind of death that puts you in a grave, but the damning kind. The death of living endlessly in a hopeless loop, numb and empty, severed from the joy of life.

I tug the dress over my head, pulling it into place as Sean holds a hand out to me. I rest my hand in his, and his fingers wrap around mine, giving them one gentle squeeze before he leads me from his room.

My heart is in my throat, making it difficult to breathe as we walk down the short hallway leading to the front door. I do not remember existing outside of this house, and I’m not sure how I’m going to make it, but I grip Sean’s hand tightly, knowing he will be with me to keep me safe.

The stained-glass window lets moonlight in, dusting the floor in dark colors and shifting patterns.

We step underneath the light, the different hues illuminating our faces as we stand looking at each other.

He finally pulls his hand from mine, opening the front door to reveal a long driveway winding down a sloping hill.

City lights glitter in the distance, like twinkling stars scattered across the ground.

“I know who you are,” Sean whispers. I turn to him, confused. The look in his eyes is so sad I nearly reach out to comfort him, but he stills me by saying, “You’re Maggie.”

Maggie, Maggie, Maggie.

The name is called to me, shouted to me, screamed at me, the voices sounding like those of friends trying to bring me back from a dark pit, and I have no idea why.

“What did you say?” I whisper, my eyes growing wide.

“I only heard it once, spoken to you by someone I think cared a lot for you. Someone who will have missed you, if he was allowed to remember you at all. Someone from a life that was stolen from you.”

“I don’t understand,” I say, shaking my head.

Sean pulls his hand from mine. He pushes on my back, steering me gently forward as he says, “Goodbye, Maggie.”

I whip my head to him, pinning him with a panicked stare. “Wait, you’re not coming with me?”

Sean gives me a sad smile, shaking his head, his eyes hurt but resolute. “Someone has to take care of Alister, but I have to get you out of harm’s way first.”

I open my mouth to respond, to tell him I can’t possibly make it on my own, that I can’t survive without him—

“Care to tell me how exactly you plan to ‘take care’ of me?” Alister asks.

Sean spins around, stepping aside and giving me a full view of the wide-open front door. Alister is leaning against the doorframe, his hands in his pockets, his posture completely at ease.

But he has death in his eyes.

“Alister…” I whisper. When he holds a hand up to silence me, I am ashamed to instantly obey.

Snapping my mouth closed, I tremble under his rage-filled gaze.

He buries me under the weight of it until I can no longer breathe, before he slowly turns his eyes to Sean, and I am filled with a whole different fear.

“Come here, Magpie,” Alister demands, still holding Sean’s steady gaze as he emphasizes every word.

Sean does not move, meeting Alister’s glare with a hatred I have never seen on his face before. He takes one small step, placing himself in front of me, blocking me from Alister. I hear the growl reverberating through Alister’s chest, and I’m terrified for that anger to be unleashed on Sean.