Page 19 of Love the Way You Lion (Rise of the Resistance #3)

The Artist Frets and Fawns

RAFE

I t’s killing me.

I know that she’s in pain, but she’s trying to hide it.

It’s bad enough that it’s seeping into me, so it’s no joke.

My primary is at Sari’s house, letting our mate—if you can even call her that anymore—fill her head with Christ knows what.

It’s almost as if they are trying to send her over the deep end.

Sari destroyed my primary the other day; now she’s back for more.

When will it be enough?

Deli let me know she was going because Sari said she ‘needed’ to clear the air. Neither of them invited me, which leaves me alone, pacing in my studio as I wait for the other shoe to drop.

Wilde losing his marbles before the accident was bad enough; now the sod’s fucking everything up from the grave. That’s become so fucking on-brand for him that I don’t even have to think about it to believe that this is all about the deceased blogger .

I sound awful—he was my mate. However, there’s so much water under that bridge, and most of it is bloody. It’s not surprising that I’m bitter or that my primary is swallowing her anger for the sake of old sentiment. She’s being loyal and killing herself doing it.

The minute we put the urn in the ground, I was finished with that ball and chain.

I knew I’d made the right decision, when the coyote announced her plan to resurrect him.

I mourned in the days after his death and I’m not about to rehash it.

Wilde passing meant I was not under any obligation to play their games.

Sari is mated to Deli and I; I can’t change that any more than I can the other ex-mates.

However, I can choose not to take part in the emotional gladiator games anymore.

And I am.

There are still secrets, but they can rest now.

If we told Taurus and Talia about the physical abuse, they might kill her.

My primary is terrified that they will never want to touch either of us again.

Fear and shame are life’s great motivators, and it’s keeping us silent about the goings-on at the Den, despite Wilde’s death.

We don’t want anyone to know what awful things we let happen to us because we got spun in the silken webs of loyalty, love, and fear.

I pad to the bar and grab a glass, pouring a couple of fingers of bourbon,and toss it back.

It feels like that kind of day.

“Hello, love,” Blade says, walking in with her blade, Precious, spinning in her palm.

Giving her a slight smile, I sigh. “There you are. The bird should know that the cat’s not at home. She’s prostrating, I assume.”

She blinks. “Prostrating?” The knife spins faster and her brow knits in concern .

“She got called to the Den to ‘work it through’. I can only assume they’re raking her over the coals.

She’s keeping me out, but enough is coming through for me to know it’s not good.

That bloody git’s torturing us from the grave, I fucking swear it.

” Her head turns slowly to look at me in surprise and I shrug,“I’m agitated today. ”

“I’ll say.” She stops talking to communicate with the bird mentally, and then she groans.

“Taurus says he can feel her. She’s upset, but she’s keeping the specifics locked down.

He only gets a general feeling of pain. It’s making him angry, and it’s pissing me off.

I feel like taking a swipe at the stunted little bitch myself.

If she thinks Taurus is bad—” The blade flies past my face and embeds in the door frame.

“Hex has to spackle the walls and shit every time you do that, woman. You’re becoming high maintenance.” I give her a reproachful look, then I sigh. “We have to stay calm and not let our anger feed hers. With Maeve, her emotions ride high, you know?”

“With every heart wrench, there’s an apology from that twat—then vice that versa. When do the checks not cover the balance, I wonder? Words cannot be unsaid, and she said some horrible things to Deli at the last visit.”

“I know. The cat will have to handle it, though, because she’s not accepting any help from us.”

Talia shakes her head. “Sari has some leeway because her mate died, but it only goes so far. Taurus will decimate her if she pushes too far with Deli.”

I’m definitely aware of that.

I open my arms, hoping to distract her. “Come here. For now, I’d just like a hug.

I need some contact; it keeps me grounded.

” Moving like wildfire, she’s in my arms and squeezing me before I finish the sentence.

I kick up a purr and she murmurs in happiness.

It’s such a little thing that makes people so happy.

“You flounced out this morning after saying something noteworthy, and I haven’t heard from you since. ”

“I never flounce; I stride. I do an occasional sexy strut or a serpentine sway, but I never flounce.”

“Uh-huh. Locomotion notwithstanding, the words were the big deal. It sounded like a profession.”

“Be a little more specific? What kind of profession—doctor, lawyer, accountant?” she grins, teasing me.

“Not a career, but the other profession. As in, where you say something important.”

“Ooh. I did that?” She bats her lashes at me and I chuckle.

“I think so.” She doesn’t answer and I frown. “Being difficult, I see. You don’t care to reiterate it, huh?”

Her look is scathing. “Do I look witless to you? It occurred to me while I was at work that I’ve been the one doing all the spouting of declarations. I’m making all the decisions and taking all the risks. I’m scared, okay? I don’t want to be out on that branch alone anymore.”

Tweaking her nose, I wink. “I was only trying to get you to say it so I could say it back. If the flo—striding hadn’t happened as you left, I would have earlier.”

“Oh.” She frowns and looks a little sheepish. “That was a whole stomach full of nerves all day for nothing.”

“It was all your own doing, pet. You didn’t give me a chance. It’s the truth, though. I do.”

Her smile is tender, happiness and relief showing in her dusky gray eyes. “How’d the melted ice cream issue go? You were sure we were in trouble for leaving it all night.”

“Ugh. Bitch, bitch, bitch—that’s what I got.”

“Sorry. We were doing well eating it until we got distracted.”

“It’s okay. Besides, I enjoy making Hex grumpy. It’s not a proper day if I don’t piss everyone in the house off once.”

Talia chuckles and tilts her head. “I think you should go first now.”

“You do, huh?”

“I do it because I'm so shy and retiring.” She makes an innocent face and I snort.

“Does anyone ever believe that rot?”

“No. It might be the pointies. What do you think?” Her blades spin on her palms and I grin.

“Your attitude might be a factor.”

“I have a fine attitude.”

“I like your attitude as well, or it’d be hard to love you so damned much.”

Her smile creeps over her face like the dawn breaking. Her eyes glow. Launching herself at me, she knocks me to the lounge with a throaty laugh. “Ha!”

“Got me, huh?”

“Thank god. It took two days!” Her grin is wicked,and I roll my eyes. “Talk about a long chase. I love you too, long hair.”

“Is that my nickname now?”

“I’m trying things as I go until I find one that fits. I like long hair, though. Taurus’ Sampson crack was more intelligent than normal for him.”

“I’m sure that he's more intelligent than that.”

Her laugh is low and full of humor as she shushes me. “Shh! Sweet hell, if he hears that it’s a whole puffy chested, swishy tail feather thing—and he’s already impossible to live with because of all the compliments your mate dishes out to him.”

“She has a problem with ego puffing. She can’t help it. When she loves, she loves like today is the last day ever. It’s how she’s made.”

“They’re good for each other. He and I—he’s a part of me, he always will be. But she completes him and he’s happy. I thank her for that.”

“I feel how happy he makes her. It’s been a while since I felt that.” I’m not lying to her; it’s true.

I haven’t seen her that happy since—well, since before the winter.

“You do not understand. Broody Taurus is never a good thing. Until her? Yeesh.”

“I know what a moody kitty’s like and trust me, the foundations rock.”

“I’m familiar with the ground shaking. What can I say? We’ve got us a pair.”

I scratch my chin. “Well, I do. If you do, I must have missed something.”

She blinks and then bursts out laughing. “Shit, I am tired—that slid right past me on the first lap.”

“I’m being a smartass.”

“That’s not the most intelligent area of your body. ”

Scowling, I growl. “I’m smart from toe-up, thank you very much. Sheesh, tell a bird you love her and she has a license to question your intelligence.”

“I can attest to the smart mouth, but, baby, you’re matching wits with a master now. You may as well toe up. As a consolation prize, though, I’ll tell you I love you again.”

“Ooh, I like that prize.” I pull her down for a kiss.

Lifting her head, she grins. “I love you, but I’m going to need a nap. Today’s taken the wind right out of me.”

“You can do me up all improper later, love. Rest now.”

“That sounds good, baby.” She yawns and wraps around me as I carry her to the couch. I might have to think about a bloody bed in here.

Who would have thought?