Page 71 of Love and History
Holden straightened his long legs in front of him and pointed up at the heavens. “We used to have star parties in our yard. We’d dress up as celebrities or historical figures and put on shows using flashlights as spotlights.”
“Oh, that sounds cool.”
“It was. We could choose to be whoever we wanted, but the object was to stay in character, perform a song or a comedy act, then…name a star, a constellation, or planet and recite a fact.”
I furrowed my brow. “You lost me. Give an example.”
He shook his head. “No way.”
“C’mon,” I coaxed, slipping my cell into my pocket. “My childhood summers were boring compared to yours. I ate popsicles, rode my bike all over hell and gone, and played a fuckton of baseball. Don’t get me wrong, it was nice, but yours sounds…fun. In a different way.”
“It was.”
“That’s it? You’re not gonna share. Okay, fine. I’m gonna guess this was how it went down. You were George Washington and you sang ‘Yankee Doodle Dandy,’ pointed at the sky, and said… ‘The moon is a space rock, but once upon a time, it was made of cheese.’” I smiled affectionately when he laughed like a loon.
“No…well, yes to the Washington part, including the song choice. However, the space trivia had to be factual, and repeats were not allowed. It went something like this…” Holden hopped from his chair, fussed with the collar of an imaginary coat, and did an impromptu tap dance. And he wasn’t half bad. He tippity-tapped around me with his arms spread like wings, then came to a stop and zapped me with a megawatt grin that melted me from the inside out and blurted, “Footprints left on the moon will never disappear because there is no wind in space.”
“Is that true?”
“Yes.”
I narrowed my eyes. “Give me another one.”
He broke into another dance—a little more animated than the last one. “Pluto is smaller than the United States. And a single day on Pluto is one hundred and fifty-three point six hours long.”
Okay, my smile was actually starting to hurt my face. “Yeah?”
I’d thought I was comfortable in my skin, but I was nothing like him. Holden had been taught to use his imagination and given fuel to ignite his interest in science while I’d been taught to be cunning and savvy—and when necessary, to be a human bulldozer.
I licked my lips, willing the rush of heat and desire to fade. I felt hot and cold and weak in the knees, grappling with feelings I’d buried for years. Warm goopy feelings I’d thought I wasn’t allowed to feel about a guy, but probably always had to some degree.
“Honest-to-gosh truth. When I was about ten, my brother came up with this one…” Holden perched on the firepit ledge and glance up at the sky. “Only five percent of the universe is visible from Earth. That’s also true. And it was the beginning of my obsession with space and physics. I threw microbiology in when I considered going into medicine, but the concept of boundless, unchartered territory is thrilling and frightening. But mostly thrilling.”
I leaned forward and stroked the inside of his thigh affectionately. “I like the way you talk. And the way you think. You’re so…passionate.”
“So are you.”
“But do I burn for something? You said that the other day and…it kind of struck me. I have interests, like baseball and lacrosse, and I’m pretty good at both. But I’m not passionate the way I was when I was a kid. Life gets in the way, and the things I used to build my time around don’t give me the same thrill, you know?”
“Passions change. Maybe the law is your new passion?”
“No, it’s my quest. Something I feel like I have to do,” I replied.
“Why? Your parents weren’t lawyers.”
We’d learned basics about each other’s families over the past few months. For instance, he knew my father passed away and that I rarely saw my mom now. And I knew that his folks were hippies who owned a Christmas tree farm in Pennsylvania, but we hadn’t gone beyond surface details. Now I knew about Sarah and pineapple cookies and his love of space. It made me hungry for anything he was willing to share.
But I hadn’t reciprocated. Not the big stuff. Not the hard stuff.
“No, my mom was the CEO of a big finance firm until she met Gill and retired. Dad worked a part-time gig at the bank for a while and played chauffeur to my brothers and me after school,” I said matter-of-factly. “Dean went into computers, but Ryan is a finance guy like our mom. Not a lawyer in the group.”
“What made you go into law?”
“I don’t like injustice,” I replied, continuing in a gravelly tone. “This is the only way I think I can do something to honor my dad and make the assholes accountable, so it doesn’t feel like he died for nothing.”
Holden furrowed his brow. “I don’t understand. I thought he had a heart attack.”
“He did. The prescription pain pills he took for a bum knee weakened his heart. He was addicted to them. The truth is, he died of a drug overdose.”