Page 50 of Love and History

“Sure.”

“Do you have a new lover?”

A sudden inferno consumed me. My cheeks were blazing hot.

“Well, I…uh…”

Marlon sighed. “I see. It must be serious.”

“No, it’s…no. I mean…” Some days I wished I was a good liar. I wasn’t, though. I was terrible at the art of strategic subterfuge. “It’s…um, no. I don’t know.”

He grinned, leaning in to peck my cheek. “Then there’s still hope for me. Good evening, Holden.”

And just like that, he was gone.

I stared at the streetlamp’s shadow on the pavement and furrowed my brow. Marlon’s tenacity made him a compelling educator but an exasperating ex-lover.

I didn’t appreciate being interrogated about my love life. It was amazing, thank you very much. But it was private. No one knew about Ezra. Not even Tommy.

That felt rather…claustrophobic. LikeIwas the one in the closet. Not so long ago, the idea alone would have given me a good old-fashioned panic attack. The kind that required sedatives and breathing lessons.

I’d been here before, and I knew myself well. I wouldn’t be able to keep this up for long.

I would never out him, but I should probably warn Ezra that I was a secret basket case with a finite fuse, I mused as I sat behind the wheel. I pulled a water bottle from my bag and took a sip, then reached into the back seat and grabbed the firstchapeauI found…a bowler hat, circa the turn of the last century.

This was a good time to transport myself into a different world where I could be someone else for a while. A super-genius mathematician, physicist, biologist who’d lived and died and didn’t have to deal with human limitations and frailties.

Being a regular guy with regular worries kind of sucked.

* * *

Needless to say,my mind was a jumbled mess when I pulled into the parking lot. It only made sense that I was late to rehearsal.

I set the hat on the passenger seat and slipped my computer bag strap over my shoulder before gathering my binder and—

“Yo, there he is. How’s it hangin’, Shakespeare?”

I shut the car door with a start and pivoted toward Ezra, who was leaning against his black SUV.

“What are you doing here? I thought you had a study group.” I adjusted my glasses, knocking my strap off my shoulder.

“I couldn’t stay away.” He lowered his sunglasses and flashed a winning smile. It was like being hit with a bolt of lightning out of the blue. And when he stepped into my space and set my strap over my shoulder again, I thought I might faint.

“Why are you really here?” I choked out.

He rubbed his nape and let out a strained half laugh. “The traffic from LA was light and I’m studied out, so I thought I’d see what the geek squad was up to.”

“LA?” As if that were somehow important.

Oh my gosh, where is my mind today?If this was what a bagel did to me, I was in big trouble.

“Yeah, I met Cole in Santa Monica to sign the paperwork for the new place.”

Oh.

He hadn’t said much about the house they’d looked at yesterday. Or maybe he had, and I’d been too mesmerized by his large penis and talented tongue to compute.

“Well, congratulations.”