Page 14 of Love and Forgiveness (Rough & Ready Country #6)

Chapter Eight

IZZIE

Ihaven’t seen Wolfe all week, apart from drop-off and pick-up of the kids. And he’s worked hard to make those interactions terse and brief. I should be happy, right? After all, isn’t this what I want? Closure and the chance to move on with my life?

I guess “moving on” is still jumping the gun, considering I have yet to see signed divorce papers.

But with the detached way he’s treated me this week, I can’t imagine they’re too far off.

Why does the thought of our official divorce—finally getting what I’ve claimed to want for months—make me feel like I’m having a mix between a heart attack and a panic attack?

There has to be something wrong with me.

I must be losing my mind because all I can think about is what happened at Travis’s place and how much I wanted it and more.

When Travis and Faith caught us unexpectedly, embarrassment and shame slammed into me.

How could I be so reckless and out-of-control in my former brother-in-law’s home?

I took those feelings out on Wolfe, saying things for a second time over the past seven days that I regret.

Even in the midst of that heated exchange, my self-control hung by a thread.

When he pointed out the fact we could be making love at his place or mine, my first instinct was to ask, “Which one?” Instead, I reached for anger, buttressing myself against the ferocious want that’s devoured me all week.

I continue to ponder the confession he made about our marriage therapist, too.

I had no idea Paul made him feel that way.

It brings so much clarity to the situation, only so far after the fact I don’t know if it matters anymore.

Because of his intimidating appearance and cool confidence, it’s hard to imagine anything could make Wolfe feel insecure, but feeling that way and then seeing me via Zoom sitting in Paul’s office would have felt excruciating to him.

How many other misunderstandings linger between us?

Wolfe has also been infuriatingly quiet on the subject of the museum and security.

I know I have to trust him on the matter.

I brought him in, and I need to let him do it his way.

I know he won’t let me get stoned, but it’s hard to put blind trust in a man whose life remains constructed around so many deceptions.

At least he gave me the go-ahead to let the kids spend the weekend with my brother, Steve, and his family. He’s a hockey player, and he and his wife have rented a house at Tahoe for their oldest daughter, Maddy’s thirteenth birthday.

I just picked Matt and Stasia up from the after-school program, and I’ve got their overnight bags in the trunk of my car.

Steve, Stacey, and the kids will be by any moment to pick them up.

One of Stasia’s pigtails has come unbraided, and she complains bitterly to me as I make her hold still so that I can fix it.

“Ouch!” she screams dramatically. She has one of the most tender scalps of anyone I know.

“Hold still, sweetie. When you move, it makes me accidentally pull your hair.”

“Daddy never pulls my hair.”

The thought of that giant of a man patiently combing and braiding her hair makes my heart warm. It also makes me instantly smile, even as my heart aches. God, I miss him and what we once were together.

Between Wolfe’s six months in the UAE and three months since his return, nearly a year has passed since we lived together and six months since I served him the papers. The last time we attended marriage counseling was over Zoom, and he hung up, infuriated within the first fifteen minutes.

I would have waited to serve the papers.

It felt like a heartless thing to do, but he wouldn’t give me an end date on his contract.

Knowing how unexpected things always seemed to come up, I went ahead with them.

I wonder if the divorce papers made him come back early.

They certainly seemed to settle him down.

Just a little too late. But is it ever really too late when you’re married?

It’s a question that’s been on my mind all week and one I still have yet to answer.

Why does that thought make my stomach drop and my eyes tear up?

Although I’ve barely seen him all week, the three times I did, starting at Lucky’s, have turned my world upside down.

And they have me questioning everything.

But it’s got to be too late now. Right? Besides, he cheated on me.

How else was I supposed to interpret his surly reaction and immature refusal to discuss the matter?

Stasia wiggles away from me as soon as her pigtail is back in place, although I have to admit my repair work doesn’t look as good as Wolfe’s original version.

Who’d have thought an Army Ranger would specialize in little girl braids on the side?

Matt comes running in with a new Pez dispenser.

“Look what Richard gave me, Mom!” He exclaims, pulling another piece of candy out of the Spider-Man dispenser and popping it into his mouth.

“I hope you’re okay with Pez. He grabbed and claimed it before I could say a thing,” Richard says, following my son into the room.

The thirty-something professor has messy, curly mahogany hair and wears tortoise shell-rimmed glasses that give him a classic academic look.

I feel bad for enlisting Richard’s help at the museum.

I met him at Sac State, and after I got the director position, he kept asking if volunteers were needed.

He already worked at a couple other museums in the region.

So, I invited him to volunteer as a docent because of his exceptional knowledge of Native American artifacts.

But I’m so embarrassed by what I’ve found since starting.

I’m also nervous about what he’ll tell my advisor and those in the Anthropology Department once this all comes to a head.

“Pez is fine. Thank you, Richard. I’m sorry my kids are running around like this. I don’t mean to make you their babysitter.”

“It’s fine, Iz. You know how much I love your kids,” he says with a big smile.

I sometimes feel like he wants more from me than a professional relationship.

Something I can’t wrap my head around. After all, what man could ever compare to Wolfe?

Richard’s intense gaze makes me feel uncomfortable, like an insect under a magnifying glass in the sun.

“No, it’s not fair. I should keep them closer.” Besides not bothering Richard, who’s been working meticulously on the Native American basket collection, I also want to keep them far away from whoever’s involved in the potential artifact laundering that’s going on.

I hear one of the docents in the echoing front hallway. “Are you Steve Webb? The goalie? Oh, my goodness. I thought I recognized you!”

I rush out to the entrance to save my brother and sister-in-law from interrogation by Roger.

He’s a volunteer who helps out with the historic photography collection.

A retired professor, he’ll talk your ear off.

I know how busy Steve and Stacey are with birthday party planning, so I don’t want to leave them at Roger’s mercy any longer than necessary.

“Hi, you two!” I exclaim, running out to hug them both. My brother wraps me in a big bear hug.

“You’re dressed up,” Stacey notes, her eyebrows raising. “Do you have a hot date tonight?”

“That’s funny,” I say with a sarcastic laugh. Matt and Stasia have followed me out into the hallway and so has Richard.

The professor’s ears perk up at the mention of me going on a date. He steps forward, saying, “Well, the whole crew’s about to stage a mutiny and force Izzie to go out for happy hour. If you want to call that a hot date.”

“Hardly,” I say with a laugh. Richard pushes himself forward next to me, offering his hand to Steve and Stacey and introducing himself. His pushy impatience annoys me, especially since I was mere moments from politely introducing him.

“And how do you know Izzie?” Stacey asks, her eyebrows in her hairline. Confusion is written all over her face as her head bobbles between the professor and me.

Steve is having none of this, though. Like my other brothers, he thinks I made a huge mistake by leaving Wolfe. He stares at Richard now, sizing him up with a sour scowl.

“You’re pretty young to be a docent,” Steve remarks drily. “But I guess it takes all kinds to be an incel.”

I cover my mouth, trying to suppress the shocked laughter his comment produces. Leave it to Steve.

Richard stares at him in earnest, and I realize he has no clue what an incel is. I’m not about to explain it, either. Fortunately, his ego gets the better of him, and he says, “Actually, I’m an associate professor in the Anthropology Department at Sac State. I’ll be up for tenure soon.”

“Okay, cool,” Steve dismisses, turning to me. “Sorry to cut this short, but we’ve still got a ninety-minute drive.”

“Thank you for coming and getting the kids. They’re so excited about this weekend.”

Stacey grabs each of my children’s hands, and we all head out, leaving Roger and Richard talking to each other. At my Toyota, Steve says, “No offense, but that Richard guy’s a weirdo. That’s probably your thief right there.”

“Shhh,” I say, frantically looking at the kids. “How do you even know about that?”

He shrugs. “Kurt.”

“Okay, well, can we keep that between us for the moment?”

“I don’t get it. What thief?” Matt asks, glomming on with child-like precision to the one word in the sentence I didn’t want him to hear.

I shake my head, frowning. “Thanks, bro,” I mouth silently.

I retrieve the kids’ overnight bags from the back of my car. Steve grabs them, throwing one over each shoulder. “I think that’s everything. Can you think of anything else you need?”

“Did we remember to pack my pajamas and slippers, Mama?” Stasia asks gravely. She’s always been my little worrier.

“I don’t know. Daddy was the one who helped you this morning.

Do you want to check your bag?” Soon, I’m rifling through her bag.

But everything’s packed with military precision, and extra clothes abound.

I kneel in front of her. “You and Daddy did a great job. You have everything you need. You’re going to have so much fun with Maddy and Aunt Stacey! ”

“That’s right, sweetie, we’re having the ultimate slumber party—princess movies, popcorn, hair curlers, fingernail polish, you name it.”

“Oh, great!” Matt howls dramatically. “Can I just stay with Daddy and go fishing instead?” He looks up at me with Wolfe’s pleading, hazel eyes, and it takes everything in me to shake my head.

I ruffle his earth-colored locks. “You’re going to have a great time. Besides, how will your cousin Mitch survive the girl party without you?” Hearing about Mitch doesn’t make him feel any better.

“He’s two years younger than me and doesn’t even like Legos or Pokemon,” Matt replies ruefully.

I turn towards him, kneeling. “You two will have a blast. You always do. Do you have Mr. E with you?”

Matt nods emphatically. “Yep, I made sure to pack him this morning.”

Matt has a habit of unpacking and repacking multiple times, so I never know what he’s left with. And if Mr. E doesn’t make it to Tahoe, I’ll be driving the ninety minutes up there this evening. He can’t sleep without the worn-out stuffed animal.

Thankfully, Stacey unzips the bag hanging from my brother’s shoulder, retrieving the threadbare, pale yellow teddy. She hands him to Matt, and I sigh with relief.

Still kneeling, I grab onto both of my kids.

“Alright, you two. Give me plenty of hugs and kisses. You know, moms live on their babies’ hugs and kisses.

So, I’ll need an extra supply with you two gone all weekend.

” I’m already missing them and unsure of what to do with myself.

They clobber me at the same time, nearly knocking me backward.

“I love you two. And I’m going to miss the heck out of you both.

Have a blast with Uncle Steve and Aunt Stacey. ”

“We will!” they holler as Stacey takes their hands again, leading them towards my brother’s minivan.

It’s insane to think about what a family man he’s become.

Minivan and all. Of course, it’s handy for holding hockey goalie gear and skates, too.

I see Maddy and Mitch sitting inside and rush over to say hello to them.

Maddy’s a bit older than Matt and already in full preteen mode.

She barely looks up from her phone to greet me, and Mitch is in the middle of a video game on his Nintendo Switch.

In other words, he only has slightly more attention to offer me.

I hug Steve and Stacey again once the kids are inside and wish them a lovely weekend.

“The offer still stands if you want to come out. We’ve got an extra room, and our views are insane,” Stacey says.

“And we’re doing avocado facials with cucumber eye covers,” Maddy exclaims, finally looking up from her phone. “I found it on Pinterest.”

“Nice!” I’m unsure of what the weekend holds.

Especially until I better understand how Wolfe plans to handle the museum situation.

I may spend the whole weekend at the museum, researching and compiling more evidence, depending on his next move.

“I probably need to stay here. But I’ll text you.

” Leaning forward, I whisper in Stacey’s ear, “There are gifts for Maddy in Matt’s bag. ”

Stacey winks and gives me a thumbs-up before I head back into the museum.