Page 33 of London Holiday (Sweet Escapes Collection #2)
Chapter thirty-three
“ L izzy, dear, I am so glad you are home!” Jane Bennet was the only family member to greet the travellers at the door, but her sincere pleasure at receiving her sisters and her aunt made up for whatever might have been lacking from their parents and other sister.
Elizabeth kissed her elder sister on the cheek and offered a wan smile. “Jane, have you been keeping well? Has it been very trying here? I am so sorry you could not have come with us!”
Jane gave a dismissive little wave of her hand, but her tone was not nearly so light as it might have been. “Mama has been keeping to her room, and Papa only emerges from the library to remind Mary that her governess is to arrive soon. Mary has not ceased crying in a fortnight.”
At this, Kitty emitted a loud groan and began to pout. “And I suppose I shall have to be under her authority as well! It is not as if I have done anything wrong. I shall have to spend my days playing the pianoforte with Mary and never attending another ball for two more years!”
Mrs Gardiner turned to speak some low words of remonstrance to her younger niece, but they went unheeded. Kitty gave her coat and bonnet into Mr Hill’s hands, then lumbered off with a petulant sigh to her own room.
Elizabeth was quickly divesting herself of her own outerwear and leading Jane aside to the sitting room for a private interview. “And Lydia? Have you had word of her? ”
“Only once. I understand she is not permitted to write often, but the last letter sounded as if that place is perfectly horrid.”
Elizabeth sighed and shook her head. “I wish she did not have to go there! Perhaps… well, I hope someday she might come home again.”
“Do you mean after one or two of us are securely married? Perhaps then Papa will suffer her to come back?”
Elizabeth tried to smile, but it looked more like a grimace. “Perhaps, yes, that is what I mean.”
“Mama was simply determined that you would come home engaged, or at least with one or two fine prospects. Did you meet any gentlemen while you were out with Aunt? I hear that uncle has a number of acquaintances—a few promising young clerks and solicitors, he says. They are not gentlemen, of course,” Jane patted her sister’s shoulder, “but must a man be a gentleman to be agreeable?”
Elizabeth felt her aunt’s eyes on her, and she shook her head. “No. I did not meet anyone, gentleman or otherwise.”
“Oh, well,” Jane dismissed her fears, with perhaps more philosophy than confidence. “Our new neighbour, Mr Bingley, is settled in now. I am sure you must have heard all about it. Mama is quite dispirited though, for Papa simply refuses to visit him, but I am in hopes that it is not too late to meet him one day. There is an Assembly next week, and anyone can be introduced in a ballroom. And surely a young single gentleman might have some friends, so we are not without hope.”
“Jane,” chided Elizabeth, “I cannot abide such talk! Is the seeking of a husband to be the only conversation worth having? Are we to speak of nothing else now but single men and assemblies? Are we to forget entirely that we are rational creatures, capable of thinking and feeling and forming attachments that have nothing to do with fortunes or connections? ”
Jane cast a doubtful look to Mrs Gardiner, who shook her head very subtly. If Elizabeth noticed this gesture, she chose to ignore it.
“I am sick to death of the whole business, Jane,” she continued. “It is all a sham, and happiness is not for those who desire it, nor even deserve it, but for those who can afford to extort it from others. And who is to know what lies beneath the appearance of goodness? Nay, it is too much, Jane, and I cannot bear speaking of it just now.”
“Dearest,” Jane ventured hesitantly, “you sound very tired. Perhaps you want to lie down and rest.”
“No, Jane, I am not tired. I am weary.”
Jane bit her lip, her porcelain brow wrinkling very slightly. “Are they not one and the same?”
“I am afraid not, for one can be cured by slumber, and the other only by some magical ambrosia.” Elizabeth turned and accidentally met her aunt’s eye. Conviction cast her gaze to the floor, and she spared them each one more forced smile before asking of Jane, “Is Papa in his study?”
“Yes, just as he always is.”
“Thank you, Jane. I believe I must speak with him.” Elizabeth began to walk away, her eyes still low, but turned back in a moment to fondly touch her sister’s cheek. “Dearest Jane, what a relief it is to see you! I wish I had some measure of your goodness. Then, perhaps, I might deserve the happiness I wish for you.” She turned away again before Jane could respond, her shoulders stooped in apparent sorrow, and disappeared in the direction of their father’s study.
Jane was left to watch after her with an astonished gasp. “What was that all about? Has Lizzy been suffering low spirits all this time over Lydia and Mary?”
Mrs Gardiner sighed and shook her head. “Elizabeth had a rather… unique holiday in London. Perhaps I might say that her experience in Town is one that she is likely to recall with equal measures of sentiment and regret for many years. ”
“Oh, dear!” Jane cried. “That sounds serious. I hope she has done nothing too shocking.”
“That,” Mrs Gardiner raised a brow, “would be a mild description.”
“What do you mean, Lizzy? I cannot understand these words you are saying to me. I think rather they are Lydia’s words, but they are coming from your mouth. You do not mean to tell me that you have shocked half the ton . Indeed, would that I could have seen it! And this great lady Collins admires to the point of folly, did you truly prove such a frustration to her designs? My dearest girl, I cannot think whether I should congratulate you or confine you to your bedroom until you turn eighty. Had this gentleman any notion of the hornet’s nest into which he had stepped? Did he presume you would cause him no trouble if he sported with you for the day?”
“Papa it was nothing like that. Well, at least it did not begin like that.”
“Elizabeth Marie Bennet, I had thought better of you! At the least, you could have made your mother happy by being seen embracing the man in public. That is how it is done, or so I am told. Think of the jewels and pin money! By the by, is the air balloon ride worth the full shilling?”
“Papa, please do not tease me! The matter is far too grave. I know I have done wrong—I have dashed my chances at respectability when my position was already fragile. Do not, I pray, cast more guilt upon me with these jests!”
“Then I shall perform the requisite rites of fatherhood and demand an accounting of your actions. Will that suit? And, indeed, I am curious. How is it that my one intelligent daughter, the one who is capable of discerning what the others cannot and more determined than any to never fall for empty charm; how is it you are as easily smitten by a bicorn hat and a set of shiny brass buttons as my most foolish child?”
Elizabeth bit her lower lip. “He was not wearing a bicorn hat. It was a rather humble sort, in fact.”
Her father rolled his eyes. “Would you care to explain to me how you think you could have escaped such a caper unscathed? And your virtue! Shall I be doubting that?”
“Papa!”
“Well, the question had to be asked. Tell me the plain truth, Lizzy. How many will be speaking of this, and is there some detail that must be covered up, so that the Bennet name does not become a byword for loose females?”
“Only my aunt and uncle are familiar with the details. Kitty does not even know the full tale. Mr Collins is far too ashamed of his own behaviour to breathe a word—and the… the gentleman threatened him, on pain of divestiture, should he in any way betray his knowledge of the affair.”
“You are lucky, then. Elizabeth, I never thought I would have to say something like this to you, but I am afraid I must insist you marry almost immediately. You are too old for Mary and Kitty’s schoolroom, and I cannot afford to send another daughter off to join Lydia, even if I wished it. But you must wed, and straightaway. If word if this should spread—”
“I know, Papa. Please do not remind me! I shall do my duty and marry the first man to approach me, if any such man should exist.”
“I fear it shall be a come down in the world for you to secure someone quickly… at least you are spared Collins, but I do not know who can be brought up to scratch. The one we find might well be more insufferable than he! I will speak to your Uncle Philips, perhaps he knows of a shopkeeper in need of a clever wife. Good heavens, Lizzy, it pains me to do this, but you leave me no option!”
“I know it is all my own doing, and I freely accept the consequences. Make whatever arrangements you wish, and I will abide by your choice. Pray, seek the most respectable match you can. It is not for myself, but I would not see Jane suffer, nor Kitty and Mary.”
Her father snorted. “Mary shall be facing a similar choice to yourself, most likely.”
“You know that nonsense with Lydia was not her fault, Papa. Is there not some redemption for her?”
He frowned. “Mary is only seventeen. I have yet a little time before I must decide what is to be done with her, and perhaps by that time you and Jane will have secured respectable matches, and some of it will be forgotten.”
Elizabeth stared at the floor. “I understand, Papa. May I go to my room now?”
“Aye, and do not show your face again for a month.”
“Yes, Papa,” she muttered in dejection, moving slowly toward the door.
“But you must come out again to sit with your mother in the drawing room every morning, in case any should call on us. And be certain that you are ready for next Thursday’s assembly! Your mother will not tolerate your absence from that occasion.”
Elizabeth groaned.