Page 89 of Lethal Vengeance

The darkness surrounding me is never-ending. Is it a trap of my own making or the punishment Armando told me I deserved? His voice whispers to me constantly, full of truths and half-truths. I want so desperately to deny his words, but I can’t.

The loudest whisper is truth. She could have come home at any time.

Even thinking those words tears me up inside. Eleven months of sleepless nights, searching video footage, and questioning suspects. Eleven months spent tracking down every lead. Eleven months of imagining the worst. All I thought about was her.

I wish he’d never told me.

It doesn’t change what he did to her. Or what I did to him in return.

But it stirs up anger and guilt where there was none.

When she disappeared, I pulled every string I could reach. The Texas Rangers, my friends at my old precinct, the FBI, press contacts, you name it. I made it a huge deal. I thought the awareness would help us get leads, but if she’d been watching, the pressure would have been immense, making her terrified to come forward.

And she knew if Julio came to talk to me, I’d shoot first and ask questions later.

Inflexible. Driven by my own rigid sense of right and wrong. The law had been everything to me. It started off as something my dad and I shared, but after he died, it became my guide to life.

If she had told me about him, I would have forbidden her from seeing him. Or had him stopped at the border. My baby sister dating the cartel? Never.

Armando said they were in love, but there were indications of older bruises on her body. Did Julio abuse her? So many questions.

“Quinn, we’re stopping for gas and a restroom break,” Raider calls from the front seat.

The words filter through the fog in my brain, but it takes a minute for them to register.

“Okay,” I mumble.

Do I need to go to the restroom? It feels like we’ve been traveling for days. It’s probably a good idea.

Minutes later, I stand in the bathroom, staring at the mirror while I wash my hands. If the old me stood next to this one, they would barely resemble each other.

I’d just turned thirty when Sophia was abducted. The whole world was at my feet. After two years as a Texas Ranger, I’d found my groove. My superiors were giving me bigger cases. I was dating a couple of different men. Nothing serious, of course. My career was everything. And with Sophia in her sophomore year at university, life was good.

Three-and-a-half years later, I barely recognize the person in the mirror, and not just because of the bruising and stitches. My face is full of lines from the life I’ve lived since she disappeared. And the real irony? The law failed me. My moral compass now resembles the very people I used to loathe.

I thought I’d be free when I found out who killed Sophia and I did the same to them, but I’m still caught in a web of the unknown. I have answers, but also more questions. Where I had zero doubt, I’m now overflowing with it.

Where to start? Maybe if I saw them together, I could get some insight into their relationship. If they dated in Austin, there has to be footage of them. Sophia had her favorite haunts. I can start there.

I walk out and find them waiting for me.

Why is it so cold out here?

Raider steps forward and wraps his arms around me. The warmth radiating from his body draws me in closer.

His hand sweeps the hair back from my face. “We’ve been driving for about nine hours. It’s almost two a.m. None of us got much sleep last night. We’re going to get a hotel room for the rest of the night, okay?”

Exhaustion weighs me down, but every time I close my eyes, Armando’s voice gets louder. Maybe if they stay with me, it will help.

“One room for all of us.” I’m not sure whether I’m pleading or demanding it, but I can’t sleep alone.

He squints at Cruz and sighs. “At least he’s quiet.”

I meet Cruz’ stare with my own, but the intensity makes me uncomfortable. He sees too much. Things I want to keep hidden. And I turn away and get into the car.

Raider pulls out of the gas station and follows Cruz’ directions to a nearby hotel.

Cruz made the reservation and checked us in on the way so we can head straight to our room. When we get there, an app on his phone unlocks the door. I’m so thankful I didn’t have to see anyone, given the state of my face.