Page 45 of Legacy Wolf: Semester One (Legacy Wolf #1)

RAWLING

Why was love so complicated?

I’d used the L word when what I felt for Holden wasn’t love—not yet, anyway.

But I was allowing what had happened with Phelan to overshadow me and Holden.

Plus, there was all the weird shit with Mika and Sasha weighing on me.

Discovering shifters existed caused enough upheaval for a lifetime, so launching myself into a relationship probably wasn’t the smartest thing.

Holden and I hadn’t seen one another all week. He was busy, but I kept coming up with excuses as to why we couldn’t get together. I kept going over what Jack had said about the incident in the dining hall. And while I disagreed with her, I ran what had happened over and over in my head.

It was silly because it wasn’t Jack that Holden was involved with but me. What she thought shouldn’t matter, except she was my best friend and I did care about her opinion. Though we’d both disagreed with each other’s preferences for sex partners. And look how that turned out.

But I brushed my doubts aside because this afternoon, Holden and I were going out.

He’d suggested bowling which was cool. I’d peek at his butt when he bent over, and we could eat greasy, unhealthy food that tasted so damn good.

When Holden had taken a mouthful of pizza and was licking the grease off his lips, maybe we’d kiss.

He suggested meeting in the Sombertooth forecourt, but that place gave me the creeps because of Sasha’s death, so I met him at the front gate.

He greeted me with a huge smile, but no kiss.

I still had my fantasy of getting hot and sweaty at the bowling alley and putting my lips on his. Perhaps there’d be groping too.

“Hi. Ready for me to whip your ass?”

I froze. We hadn’t even kissed, not really, and he was telling me he was into BDSM? Where was this going to happen? In a bowling alley back room?

“Ummm, I thought we were going bowling.”

“We are. What did you think I meant?”

I studied his expression, waiting for him to piece it together. He closed one eye, tilted his head, and I imagined him rewinding what he’d said. Then it was his turn to freeze, the blood draining from his cheeks. “You thought I was going to—” He gulped, unable to continue.

“Mmmm.”

“Gods, no, that wasn’t what I was saying.” He took my arm and steered me out the gate after a nod at the senior who was on guard duty. My fingers brushed against his as we walked. It was nice, but I wanted more. I reached out to grab his hand, but he stopped and faced me.

“While there will be no whipping, I’m going to beat—” He screwed up his face. “Nope, backtrack. No beating, either. No harm will come to you, but when I win, I will lord it over you.”

Holden had booked ahead, as the weekends were busy at the bowling alley.

We rented our shoes, which I hated. Putting on shoes that other people had worn was gross.

Holden didn’t seem to have a problem with it, but I’d bought foot deodorizer, and I sprayed the fuck out of the shoes’ insoles.

Holden giggled at me and sneezed at the fumes.

The middle-aged guy at the rental counter rolled his eyes. He’d probably seen it all.

I shoulder-bumped Holden, and he grinned. My doubts disappeared as his smile curled around my heart and it fluttered instead of pounded. But my good mood evaporated as we strolled toward our lane. People stared and nudged one another. I could almost taste the tension in the air.

Holden put a hand on my back which I loved, and we sat down. While Jack and I had had a few stares and odd looks, people mostly ignored us. But we were latent. Shit, I’d done it again.

Not latent, as I’m human , I repeated in my head.

And while I could sense Holden’s tiger now that I’d been around shifters a while, I didn’t expect humans to.

I never had, and I’d been brought up by a shifter.

But perhaps having a college of shifters on their doorstep had honed the townspeople's senses and made them aware the students and faculty were different somehow.

As I avoided catching anyone’s eye, I thought of Mika and Sasha and wondered if the animosity from the people surrounding us had any relation to their deaths. Did bottled-up anger at what they didn’t understand spill over and they’d lashed out?

Since time began, humans had been fearful of change and anything new, so it wouldn’t be unheard of for blood to be shed. Illegal, horrendous, terrifying, but not uncommon, sadly.

“How about we order something yummy?” I suggested. “I’m starving.” I needed a diversion from the hostility that surrounded us, though if Holden was aware of it, he didn’t show it. “My treat.” He had rented the lane for an hour, so I was determined to buy the food.

We got mozzarella sticks and nachos to start with, and as we shared the food, people went back to eating, bowling, cheering, or commiserating.

“You’ve got to try this with the sauce.” He dipped a mozzarella stick in the marinara sauce and offered it to me. I took a bite and some sauce slid over my chin. He captured it, not with his lips or a finger but a napkin.

“Delicious.” My dick hardened, but as I was sitting and wearing dark pants, it wasn’t noticeable. At least I hoped it wasn’t. I refused to tear my gaze away from him and check. Instead, I put my hand over his, and he didn’t pull away. “Now your turn.”

Picking up a corn chip, oozing with melted cheese, guac, sour cream, and refried beans, I brought it to Holden’s lips. “Open wide.”

He swallowed but was left with a dollop of sour cream in the corner of his mouth. I tapped my lip, hoping he’d play along and pretend he needed my help in removing it. But he captured it with his tongue, and I sighed.

“Time to do what we came here to do?” Holden stood up, his crotch in my line of sight. I crossed my legs, begging my arousal to cool it.

Wishing he was talking about fucking, I wiped my mouth on a napkin and prepared to witness him “whipping my ass.”

Holden took his time choosing a ball. Gods, he was taking forever, and I yawned before he rolled the ball down the lane. A strike, of course. He was a shifter. His power, speed, and coordination were far better than any human.

“Well done. My turn.”

Unlike Holden, I grabbed the first ball I saw, didn’t follow any technique, and tossed the ball down the lane.

Oh shit! “A strike!” It was a complete fluke, just like my archery prowess.

I leaped into the air before running to Holden and throwing my arms around his neck and kissed him on the lips.

He tasted of cheese, spicy tomatoes, and olives, and I longed to shove my tongue down his throat.

But instead of returning my kiss, he removed my arms and placed them at my side. “Not here, Rawling,” he hissed.

“Why not? And if not here, then where?” What the heck was wrong with the guy? He acted as if he wanted me, but a chaste kiss—okay, I may have ground my crotch against his—and he freaked as if I had bad breath.

“We can’t. I’m a TA.”

Huh? “Not here you’re not.” I was pretty sure there were no Sombertooth people here which was a little weird. A bowling alley so close to a university should have been overrun with students. But maybe it wasn’t much of a challenge for shifters.

“I made a decision when I got the TA job that I wouldn’t get involved with any of my students.”

“What does it matter?” I spat out, ignoring the curious looks from the group next to us.

“It’s a line I’m not prepared to cross.”

“Am I not hot enough?” I cringed, wishing I could take that back.

He leaned over and whispered in my ear. “I want to stick my dick in you. Does that answer your question?”

But he hadn’t done it, and I was beginning to believe it’d never happen.

“Are you embarrassed to be seen with me?” That was a silly question because he was with me now in a very public place. And he called me on it, by extending his arms and gazing at the crowd.

“No.”

One word. No explanation or an attempt at understanding where I was coming from. This was giving me Phelan vibes, though Phelan never acknowledged me during the weeks we’d been fucking. But the “we can’t let people know this is happening” mood was the same.

I had a type apparently, one that had alphas keeping me arm’s length. I’d fallen into a trap once, and I’d done it again.

“Don’t be angry with me, Rawling.” He lifted my chin which was such an intimate gesture, I wanted to throw myself into his arms, before dragging him somewhere, anywhere, and fucking him senseless. “We just have to wait until next semester when I’m no longer your TA.”

Taking a deep breath, I nodded. I could wait a few months or give up on us. I didn’t want to give up because I’d convinced myself he was worth it.