Page 24 of Legacy Wolf: Semester One (Legacy Wolf #1)
RAWLING
Our vampires were done for the season, and based on the finale, possibly done for good.
I wasn’t usually one to get all in on television shows, but that had been a nice bonding time with Jack and a good way to wind down.
And frankly, I was bummed about it. It was silly, but whatever. It was what it was.
“Tonight’s dinner is delicious, why do you look so grumpy about it?” Bardoul asked, and it took me a bit too long to realize he was talking to me.
“It is good.” The kitchen had made lasagne and garlic bread with salad, and it was delicious. “I’m just in my head about something stupid.”
“It’s not stupid.” Jack gave me a side hug, and I looked at her, trying to figure out what exactly she was referring to. “You can’t help how you feel.”
“Anyone else confused?” Channon asked, and Bardoul’s hand shot up. I raised mine also.
“What? Okay, maybe I’m the one confused.” Jack forced a chuckle.
“I was talking about no more vampires.”
Her mouth formed a perfect O. “That was sort of our go-to Friday night.”
“I’m going to be the odd man out and admit that I saw one episode and snoozer.” Bardoul faked a yawn for emphasis.
“You can go ahead and be wrong.” Jack bit off a chunk of her garlic bread.
“Fine. I’ll play. What show is better?” Channon sat back in his chair and crossed his arms.
“Did any of you see the new witch show where she was raised by humans and then, boom, at eighteen, suddenly she’s a powerful witch and has to learn how to balance that while keeping up her grades so she can still follow her dreams of being a lawyer?
” Bardoul smirked as if he had just hit check mate.
None of us had.
“Maybe we could binge tonight? Season one has dropped. I only saw the first episode and it was good—good enough to watch again.” Bardoul looked at each of us. “What do you think?”
We all agreed that it was worth a shot given we had no other plans, and an hour later, we were in my room setting up.
Channon had a projector that we could connect to the laptop and we were able to project it on the wall.
It wasn’t the best of quality, but it was easier than all four of us squinting to watch the same laptop.
Bardoul was right, the show was fun, if not cheesy. We found ourselves watching one episode after the other, bantering back and forth about the over-the-top predicaments the witch found herself in, all while eating tons of junk food. It was the best. Until it wasn’t.
“What a dumbass.” Channon threw a piece of popcorn at the wall. “If he won’t admit you are a thing in public, he ain’t worth your time.”
Ray, the witch in question, was having a fling with a co-worker of hers from the bookstore, and he treated her like dirt in front of other people. Of course in her situation it would all work out via magical intervention by the time the episode was over, just like all of her other woes.
It hit a bit too close to home, though. And true, Phelan didn’t treat me like shit, but he pretended we weren’t anything other than across-the-hall neighbors and teammates when anyone else was around.
And it was starting to wear on me, especially after having my eyes open to how Jack was treated by Atticus.
He might not have been swoony in love with her around everyone, but she wasn’t a secret from anyone.
Whereas, as far as I knew, Phelan had told zero people about me.
“Maybe he has reasons we don’t know about.” I spoke without thinking, and suddenly all eyes were on me.
“No. If he isn’t telling his roommate, then there aren’t ‘reasons’ other than you deserve better,” Jack said.
“You? Not her?” Channon listened too carefully.
“I meant her.” Jack turned to face the screen. “I liked her hair better last episode.”
“It was the same,” Bardoul corrected. “And let’s get back to who you were talking about—for real... don’t even pretend it wasn’t Rawling. I saw his face drop.”
“And besides, this isn’t the first time you said something that had me thinking Rawling had an alpha,” Channon said pointedly to Jack.
“Please, let’s just watch the movie,” Jack begged.
I felt bad for her. She was being pushed in a corner about almost revealing information that wasn’t even about herself.
And it was Jack, she wasn’t trying to share anything.
She was a good friend and would never break my confidence intentionally.
And really, she didn’t share it now, more like she opened the door a crack for speculation.
“Fine,” Bardoul grumbled. “It’s fine if you don’t. Some things aren’t meant to be shared with everyone.”
He wasn’t even trying to guilt me, and yet the guilt came, and the next thing I knew, I blurted out, “I’m sleeping with an alpha and he sort of pretends I don’t exist.”
“That sucks,” Channon gave my shoulder a squeeze. “You deserve better than a piece of shit like that.”
“He isn’t a piece of shit.” I pointed to the screen. “But Ray is about to face her jerk of a beau, so maybe we should watch that.” The more I spoke, the worse I seemed to make the situation. It was best just to watch the show. Where were the vampires when I needed them?
We watched the show, and as Ray the witch managed to worm her way out of her predicament, the reality of mine set in.
And not the one with Phelan. We were fine the way we were.
Not good, but fine. It was more the way I was feeling about basically lying to Bardoul and Channon by omitting Phelan’s name.
We were just starting to build up our friendship, and I didn’t like the way I felt keeping it from them.
And as the credits began to roll, I couldn’t hold it in any longer.
“It’s Phelan.” That was all I said and even that was difficult to get out.
“Damn. He’s hot.” Channon whistled. “Well done.”
“Don’t encourage him.” Jack turned off the projector and got up to turn on the overhead light. “He won’t even tell his roommate the two of them are boinking—like Rawling isn’t good enough, and we both know my roomie is a catch. Most handsome guy on campus.”
I doubted that was the case, but I appreciated her saying so even if it was paired with another reminder that she thought I should shut Phelan off.
“I don’t think anyone is hot enough if they don’t want everyone to know how much you mean to them.” Bardoul turned to face me. “I don’t want you to get hurt. You deserve better.”
“It’s fine. I’m not the first or the last person fucking someone that isn’t their only and forever while in college.”
“If that was directed at me, you can just stop. Atticus and I are both on the same page. We both want the same thing—sex—and give it to each other—often.”
Bardoul groaned, and Channon looked down. Neither of them wanted to hear about Atticus and Jack getting it on.
“With you and Phelan it’s different, and don’t say I’m wrong. I’ve seen the way you look at him—you want more.” Jack looked at me as if daring me to argue. “Atticus and I know where we each stand is all I’m saying, and we agree to those terms. You don’t have that.”
Logically what she said made sense, but who dealt with relationships logically.
“Just because you know where you stand, that doesn’t mean you won’t get hurt. Sex is never just sex,” Channon said. “There are always some emotions tied up into it, especially if it is not a one-and-done. It can’t be helped.”
“I have to agree with Channon,” Bardoul said. “You’re both on a road to Hurtsville.”
“It’s our journey to take,” Jack said. “And I promise if I want your advice, I will ask.”
We all agreed to be done with the conversation.
It wasn’t getting any of us anywhere. I was relieved I no longer had to keep a secret from my friends, and knowing they cared enough to try and protect both Jack and me from ourselves meant a lot.
But beyond that, there was no reason to keep hashing things out.
“So what did we decide? Is this show a decent enough replacement for the vampires?” Bardoul asked. “Or did they ruin it by being too close to reality?”
“I’d hardly call conjuring up cheese sticks when you are hungry and in bed realistic.” Jack had a point.
“But how amazing would it be if it was,” I mused.
“If I had my pick of magical skills, cheese creating would be up there,” Channon said.
“Cheese magic sounds delightful.” Jack rubbed her belly.
“Ohhh, and what if the power included fondue?” Bardoul’s eyes lit up.
At least we were all in agreement on cheese.