Page 52 of Knot Your Basic B*tch
“Love makes everyone stupid.” I shrugged. “Maybe because love itself is stupid. But as long as you are happy, and you get there eventually, who gives a shit?”
CHAPTER 30
CHLOE
“Come on.Pick up. Please, please please.” I had the phone jammed up against my ear as tight as it could go. Honestly, all of this might just be part of the test. Maybe this really was an accurate measure of my abilities as an omega. Maybe I should just hope for the best.
No. Fuck that shit. I had studied my ass off for the entire term. It wasn’t fair that everything that I’d worked hard on for months was about to go straight into the trashcan over something as ridiculous and stressful as this tiny machine that could fit in the palm of my hands. Someone on the Omega Curriculum Development board must have been on some kind of acid-trip when they came up with this idea for our final exam.
After a mini-eternity, as the phone rang eight times, she picked up my call.
“Momma Rain! Do you know anything about keeping Tamagotchis alive?”
I could hear Momma Rain make an undignified sound, like she was covering up a snort. “Honestly, not at all. I baked a cake celebrating when Zane’s tamagotchi battery finally died. Why would you want to keep one alive?”
“It’s for my final. They gave me four of them. Four! They said it’s supposed to mimic taking care of a pack.”
“Oh wow. My final was totally different. I heard they changed things after the tragedy in two thousand thirteen.”
“What tragedy? Wait, isn’t that when the omega dorms got renovated?”
“Yeah, from the electrical fire caused by too many vibrators charging at the same time. They changed the final after that.” Momma Rain’s voice got muffled as she placed the phone down. I could barely make out what she was saying to one of my siblings. It was something about the ketchup being behind the pickle jar or something like that. “Sorry, so what was this about tamagotchis? They’re supposed to mimic taking care of a pack? What do little robots have to do with a pack?”
That was exactly what I was wondering. No matter how hard I tried with them, nothing ever seemed to be good enough. I was about to pull out my hair. The final was fifty percent of my entire grade. After all of the reading I had to do on testicles and multiple orgasms and every single topic they made me read about, how was it fair that my grade came down to this?
I was supposed to watch these little robotic terrors all night. If a single one of them died, I would fail my final. That would have been bad enough under normal circumstances, but the tamagotchis that they had acquired for the omega final? They were something else. They must have gone into the code and altered them somehow, because there was no way that anyone would ever buy one of these things recreationally if they were as demanding as these four had been.
“All of them are hungry, and there are electronic poops everywhere.” I was barely able to keep the hysteria out of my voice.
“Oh sweetie, I’m so sorry. That sounds awful. Did you try calling Rebel?”
“I think she’s having a heat or something. She’s not picking up. Everyone’s number in her pack is going straight to voicemail.” I was pacing now, with the phone jammed against my ear. I frantically pressed the buttons on the screen to give the little guy a bathagain.But as soon as I finished it, two other screens lit up demanding more food.
How was this supposed to teach me anything? I was lucky that I had met actual alphas before this. If I hadn’t… if I thought an actual pack of alphas was anything like this, all this test was teaching me was that I should seriously consider remaining single for the rest of my life.
“Do you have anyone who could help you out? In real life there is nothing wrong with getting support with your pack.” Momma Rain’s voice was empathetic, even as I heard the faint sound of something crashing in the kitchen and the screams of two of my siblings—was that Gunnar and Rowan?
“Yeah, actually…” That gave me an idea… a completely academically unethical idea, but I was desperate enough to take desperate measures. “I know who could help me out. Thanks Momma.”
Once I got myself to the Fanny Pack house, the guys were all in shock when they saw me. It was obvious that I had been crying. My eyes felt itchy and splotchy. I knew from experience that they must be red-rimmed along with tear streaks that would not go away, no matter how many times I tried to brush them off my face. I thought that they might have been relieved to find out that I had working, functional tear ducts, and was capable of being vulnerable with them, but the mood in the house went somber fast.
Brutus held my face gently, rage burning in his dark gaze.
“Who did this to you?” Brutus’ words promised vengeance and retribution. Someone or something hadharmed his scent match and nothing would stop him until that harm had been paid out in blood.
Silently, I held up the four shitty little gadgets that had been plaguing me for hours.
All three of the guys leaned in closer, frowning.
“Are those tamagotchis? I didn’t even know that they still made those. Why do you have them?” Kain’s eyes narrowed as if I was holding a fistful of grenades.
“Wait, are these things the reason you’re upset?” Sabien poked one of them warily, as if he was afraid that the little demon egg would give him an electric shock. “Why not just throw them all in the trash?” he muttered.
My lips trembled as I tried to hold back fresh tears. In a small voice, I managed to say, “They’re for my final. I can’t throw them away.”
My scent matches blinked, staring at one another in confusion. Brutus’ gaze flicked from my face to the egg-shaped gadgets in my hand, like he was having trouble making the connection why colorful bits of tech and plastic had the power to make me cry.
“These are for your final?” Kain asked, gently getting me to explain what the hell was going on.