Page 39 of Kindred Spirits at Harling Hall (Ghosts of Rowan Vale #1)

39

Brodie jumped out of the van and slammed the door shut. The sound of it made me wince. It seemed so final. A full stop on the story of us.

Except it couldn’t be, could it? Right now, there wasn’t really an us at all, and I so wanted there to be. If only I could be brave enough.

He turned round and saw me standing on the front steps. He immediately adopted an impassive look, blocking any chance I might have had of judging how he was really feeling. It was almost enough to make me give up before I’d started. That and the fear churning inside me.

What if, no matter what I said, it made no difference?

What if, even after I’d poured my heart out, he said he was leaving?

What if he’d been toying with me, just like Immi’s dad?

What if he didn’t care about me at all, just like my own?

I stared at him, stricken with terror. My throat felt so tight that I wasn’t sure I could say anything, let alone tell him how I felt.

My expression clearly alarmed him, because the impassive look vanished to be replaced by genuine concern.

‘Callie? What is it? What’s happened?’ He hurried towards me, his hand reaching for mine.

I forced down the terror and somehow, my voice managed to squeeze its way past the lump in my throat.

‘Do you care?’

He stopped, looking confused. ‘What sort of question’s that? Of course I care.’

‘But do you, though?’ I persisted. ‘Do you really?’

His eyes narrowed and he put both hands on my shoulders. ‘I’m not entirely sure what you’re asking me here, but you look bloody terrified, so I’ll ask you again, what’s happened?’

‘What’s happened?’ I gave a half-laugh. ‘ What’s happened ? What do you think’s happened? You’re leaving me! That’s what’s happened!’

He stepped back and tilted my face so I was forced to meet his gaze. ‘You’ve got to have more faith in yourself,’ he said roughly. ‘I’ve told you, Mr Eldridge will help you. He’s got some good candidates lined up and?—’

‘Brodie,’ I said brokenly, tears welling in my eyes, ‘you’re not listening to me. I didn’t say you’re leaving the estate. I said you’re leaving me !’

For a moment, there was silence as my words finally penetrated his brain. Then there was a weird sound, which I think came from him, and he took my face between his hands, the look in his eyes almost making me crumble with longing.

‘Callie… you mean it?’

‘Of course I bloody mean it! How could you… how could you even think…’

‘But you offered me a job! You said you needed me to be your estate manager.’

‘Well of course I did. I do. But how could you not know what I really meant? How could you not understand the code?’

‘What bloody code?’ he asked, baffled.

‘The code that meant, “Here’s an offer of a job but really what I’m asking is if you care enough about me to stay with me because I think I’m falling in love with you!”’

‘How was I supposed to know that?’

‘Well, I don’t know,’ I said, pulling far enough away from him to give him a light thump on the arm. ‘But you should have done, okay? Instead, all I got was you banging on about your new house in Devon and your sodding job interviews.’

His eyes were wet with tears, but he was smiling. ‘Well, how could you not know what I really meant? Didn’t you understand the code? I was really saying, “I can’t stay around here if all you want me for is to work on the estate, because it will kill me to be here and not be with you. Because I think I’m falling in love with you too.”’

I gazed up at him. ‘You do?’

‘Oh, Callie,’ he said with a sigh. ‘Didn’t you get all the hints I’ve been dropping like bricks for the last few weeks?’

‘I’m a very insecure person,’ I admitted. ‘I couldn’t quite believe it all meant what I hoped it meant. I so wanted you to stay with me, but I thought – I thought, if I wrapped up the question in a job offer and a pay rise, it might be enough to convince you to stay.’

‘I didn’t need a job offer. I don’t need a fancy title or a pay rise. Hell, I’d rather walk away from this estate and even from Grandpa than stay here knowing you didn’t see any future for us. All you had to do was tell me, but you kept pushing me away.’

‘But you didn’t make it clear enough,’ I said. ‘I can’t read signals unless they’re loud, flashing, red ones. I never believe I’m good enough so how was I supposed to know you thought I was?’

He mulled that over for a moment. ‘You’re right,’ he said at last. ‘I should have realised.’ He stroked my hair and sighed. ‘Well, will you please start believing in yourself now? You are good enough. You’re more than good enough. You’re bloody incredible, and I really want to get to know you so much better and give us a real chance.’

‘Well,’ I said, ‘that’s lovely, but you will still take the estate manager’s position, won’t you?’

He laughed. ‘If you insist. But you’re right. We’ll have to hire another accountant because I don’t intend to work every evening. I’m going to have far better things to do with my time.’

The thought of what those things might be made me go all tingly inside. Even so, there was one thing I had to make clear.

‘Brodie,’ I said hesitantly, ‘there’s not just you and me in this relationship. Immi. She’s never had a father figure in her life because you know what her real father did to her. He abandoned her before she was even born. I can’t… I can’t risk that again.’

He kissed the top of my head. ‘I promise you, Callie, I will never hurt you or Immi. You know I think she’s a great kid, and we get on so well already. Hopefully, she’ll be okay with all this, but of course we’ll tell her together. Or you can tell her. Whatever you think best.’

‘We must tell her first. About us, I mean. We’ll have to tell everyone that you’ve changed your mind about going to Devon, but we can’t say anything about us until Immi knows. Deal?’

‘Of course. I’ll follow your lead. All I want is for us to be happy. Believe me?’

The look in those blue eyes was intense and genuine.

I smiled. ‘I believe you.’

‘Good.’

He glanced round at the van and sighed. ‘I guess that means I’d better unpack all my stuff again.’

‘I guess it does.’

‘Honestly, the amount of time I’ve wasted this week, packing my stuff, packing Grandpa’s stuff…’

‘I can imagine.’

‘Then unpacking Grandpa’s stuff. Then loading up the van.’

‘Hours and hours.’

‘And now I’ve got to unload it all again and rearrange the drop-off and let Dad know we won’t be moving to Devon, and cancel the interviews and phone Mr Eldridge?—’

‘Brodie?’

‘Yes, Callie?’

‘Will you just shut up and kiss me?’

There was a sudden intake of breath, then he moved closer.

‘Yes, Callie.’

He put his arms around me, and the softness of his mouth on mine melted away the last of my doubts and fears, leaving only joy, and the excitement of a future filled with new possibilities.

You can never really be sure of anything in this life, but sometimes, you have to be brave if you want something badly enough. My heart was telling me that all I wanted right now was the chance to start a whole new journey with Brodie and see where it took us.

With obvious reluctance, he finally pulled away from me. ‘Should we go and tell everyone the good news?’

‘In a minute,’ I said, wondering if he could hear my heart as it thudded in my chest. ‘But not just yet. Do you think – if it’s not too much trouble – that you could possibly kiss me again?’

His eyes sparkled as he cradled my face in his hands.

‘It would be my pleasure,’ he assured me. ‘In fact, I can’t think of anything I’d like more.’

And so he did.

* * *

Immi gently closed the upstairs window and turned to her friend, who was eyeing her knowingly.

‘Told you, Imms,’ Florrie said. ‘I knew we’d get the best view from up ’ere, and that we’d ’ear it all.’

‘We shouldn’t really have eavesdropped,’ Immi admitted. ‘Mum’s warned me about that before.’

‘Oh,’ Florrie said airily, ‘I get told that all the time. I take no notice. ’Ow else are we supposed to know what’s going on around ’ere? No one tells us kids anything.’

‘That’s true.’ Immi stroked Brian as she leaned against the wall, deep in thought.

‘So, it looks like your mum’s got ’erself a boyfriend then,’ Florrie said cautiously.

‘Hmm.’

‘Are you okay with that?’

Immi thought about it. ‘It’s going to be a bit weird. It’s always been just me and Mum till now.’

‘Aw, you can’t go wrong with Brodes,’ Florrie told her. ‘’E’s one of the good ones, ain’t ’e? You don’t ’ave to worry about your mum cos ’e’ll look after ’er.’

‘I know,’ Immi said, smiling. ‘I like Brodie, and I’ve known for ages that Mum likes him too. I don’t know why they took so long to tell each other. I mean, look at that! His van’s packed. Talk about cutting it fine.’

‘That’s grown-ups for you,’ Florrie said with a sigh. ‘Proper daft they are sometimes. Although,’ she added warmly, ‘they’re all right really. I s’ppose we’re lucky. We’ve both got family what loves us. Can’t complain.’

Immi grinned. ‘Tell you what, do you fancy going to the shops down Churchside to see that poster of your sister?’

Florrie’s eyes lit up. ‘Our Janet? Ooh, yeah! That’d be great.’

‘We’ll have to sneak out,’ Immi said, ‘or Mum and Brodie might collar me to give me the big news, and I don’t think I’m ready to act all surprised just yet.’ She giggled. ‘I’ll have to practice. You can help me.’

They crept quietly down the stairs, Florrie taking as much care as Immi not to be seen or heard. They both knew Agnes had ears like radar sets when it came to her daughter.

Luckily, no one was in the hallway, though judging from the loud cry of delight from Lawrie that came from the sitting room as Immi carefully pulled open the front door, they were all far too busy celebrating the fact that Brodie had changed his mind about leaving.

They fairly ran down the drive, laughing in delight as they made it out of the gates and onto the pavement outside.

‘Did I ever tell you,’ Florrie asked as they headed in the direction of Churchside, ‘about the murder we ’ad in this village?’

Immi gaped at her. ‘Are you joking?’

‘Ooh, no! You ain’t ’eard? Well, a proper to-do it was, and it caused such a kerfuffle. Mother nearly ’ad a stroke and Poppa had to calm ’er down by promising to make Sir Edward keep the doors locked at all times. Like that would make a difference! What was she scared of anyway? Not like they could’ve killed ’er an’ all, is it?’

‘But who was murdered?’ Immi asked, her eyes like saucers.

Florrie grinned. ‘Let me tell you all about it.’

They headed along the pavement, chatting animatedly as they went. And if anyone saw Immi deep in conversation with an invisible companion, no one thought anything about it. It was that sort of village, after all.

They were just two little girls. A bit cheeky, prone to eavesdropping, far keener to discuss the grisly details of a murder than they should have been.

And very much loved.