Page 35 of Keeping Her Under (Deranged Highway, #1)

Thirty-Five

“My boss wants to thank you for all your help,” Ash murmurs to Ryan as they enter the warehouse.

I’m hiding in the shadows, but the light on my phone is enough to show my face – though I doubt my coworker notices me at all. While I’m watching the teddy cam footage (Asher left the bear in the car with Summer), Ryan is watching his mom.

My girl is sedated.

His is dressed up like a doll.

Lifting my eyes, I clock the hunger on his face.

My cousin shifts behind him. He leans down to whisper in his ear. “She’s blindfolded and so well trained. She’ll take your hard cock like you always wanted.”

Ryan trembles but doesn’t deny it.

“She can suck you off like you used to suck on her tits.” He reaches around Ryan’s waist and undoes his pants as he talks. The guy is so focused on his mom, he doesn’t even seem to notice. “She can ride you like a cowgirl, gripping your ‘horse’ hard with her pussy lips.”

Grabbing said cock, he tugs it free of the cloth. He strokes it as he nibbles on the nurse’s ear. “You deserve a reward for all the things you’ve done to save her. She owes you her life. Owes you from saving her from all the other rapes that would’ve happened.”

He pumps Ryan’s cock faster. The man sags on a little moan. Pre-cum leaks from his length.

“So go take what you’re owed.” He shoves Ryan forward. “She will never know you’re not me.”

As the nurse stumbles towards his mom – first tentatively, then so desperately, Asher turns to face me. The heat in his eyes is a mirror of mine. Seeing Summer on the teddy cam again makes me want to bury my cock in her pussy and show her how much I love her.

Part of me even wants to bring her in here and watch the two of them fuck. I know she can chase away my demons, and I want them gone. I don’t want to be broken anymore. I don’t want to be triggered by the thought of sex with someone who’s awake. By the mere sight of it. The sound of it.

But I’ve used her enough.

My needs are no longer a priority.

“Go ahead and go,” Asher says with a grin. “I’ve got it from here.”

Nodding, I turn to leave right as Ryan reaches the mattress. I take a few steps, then look over my shoulder. He’s naked now, and he’s suckling on her pushed-up tits as he guides one of her hands into his hair. The other he places at her pussy. Then he joins her fingers with his own.

My cock stiffening, I face forward again.

But the disgust that flares inside of me at seeing someone engage in sex is killed by the guilt on my shoulders. What if Summer hates me?

What if she can never forgive me for what I’ve done?

Then who will take care of her when I’m gone?

She looks so peaceful while she’s sleeping, with her head propped against the car window, that I almost don’t want to wake her.

Entering the backseat on the other side, I lean across and stroke her face.

For a few moments, I do nothing but bask in the feel of her skin.

Her warmth bleeds into my chest, filling it with contrasting lightness – equal parts fear and reverence.

Exhaling slowly, I tuck her hair behind her ear. As I lift her chin, I think about kissing her awake. I know her soul will sing to mine, that she won’t be disgusted with my lips on hers as my tongue feasts inside. But I don’t.

Because even when you love somebody, you can still be upset with them. You can still not want them to touch you. So until I know what she wants, I will not touch her sexually.

Resting my hand on her shoulder, I gently shake her awake. “Hey, beautiful,” I murmur as her eyes open. “How are you feeling?”

Grogginess washes over her face, followed by confusion. “Where am I?”

“In my cousin’s car. But you’re safe here. We’re not driving. We’re not going to crash.”

Her eyes widen as pain and panic hits. My soul aching for her, I grab her hand.

“It’s okay, baby. I’m here. Feel how the car isn’t moving.”

She breathes raggedly as she looks around. But even that small movement tires her.

“You’ve been in a coma for thirteen days. You’ll need to rebuild your strength.”

“I was in the hospital…” she says slowly, as if she isn’t quite sure.

“Yes,” I say.

“After I crashed my car…” Her eyes go distant.

I squeeze her hand. “Yes. Do you remember the accident?”

She shakes her head, her lips starting to wobble.

“That’s okay. Do you remember your time at the hospital?” I hold my breath, dreading the upcoming conversation where I’ll have to explain what I’ve done.

But how the fuck do you explain raping someone because you ‘didn’t know it was rape?’ What kind of bullshit is that?

Even if it’s true, it’s pathetic.

She looks at me, terrified.

My heart shatters in my chest. She doesn’t need to say the words for me to know her answer. I’m so fucking ashamed and disgusted by what I’ve done. I try to tell her I’m sorry, but she cuts in before I can get anything out.

“No…” she says. Don’t talk to me.

“No.” I don’t want to hear your fucking excuses.

I wet my lips as I start to shake. All of the words I thought of on the drive over slip away from me. I don’t know the first thing to say.

Her eyes latch on to me, wild and full of terror. “Why can’t I remember?”

I blink. My brow pinches together as I’m thrown off-guard. “You don’t remember?” I ask slowly.

“No… No.” Summer’s face twists with fear. “I don’t remember anything.”

Relief floods through me. Her accusation at the hospital was nothing more than the foggy thoughts of a coma patient. I’ve been stressing over nothing. She loves me.

“It’s okay,” I say as I squeeze her hand. “Amnesia is common after coming out of a coma. Your brain is fine. You’ve been discharged with a clean bill of health.” I smile wide as I remember the notes in her chart. “Even your spinal graft went well.”

“What does that mean?”

I nudge her foot with my own. “Feel that?”

“Yes.”

“It’s going to be a hard recovery, but you’ll be fine. I’ll be with you every step of the way.”

Exhaustion crawls across her face. As she blinks slowly, I’m tempted to end the conversation here. If she doesn’t even remember what I did to her, was she really raped? Rape requires the victim to be traumatized.

Doesn’t it?

Her eyes widen. “But I remember you”

I tense, my whole world freezing outside of the pounding of my heart. “What do you remember about me?” I rasp.

Her eyes flutter. She’s falling back asleep.

“Summer? Try to stay awake, please. This is important.”

“I’m so tired.”

“I know, baby. And I’m going to let you sleep soon, but I need you to answer a few questions so I can give you the best care.”

She huffs out a breath.

“What do you remember about me?” I ask, my stomach in my throat.

“You’re the monster under my bed…”

I flinch.

“Who saved me from the devil who was holding my heart.”

My breath catches –

Crashes.

Lurching forward, I cover her mouth with my own. Her eyes pop open. I cup both her breasts and squeeze.

“I need to make love to you right now,” I say. “Will you let me, baby? Will you let me show you how much I love you?”

She breathes into my mouth, not saying a word.

I massage her big, beautiful tits in my hands. Pinching her nipples through her hospital gown, I slide my tongue past her lips. She moans as her eyes drift shut.

“Okay…” she breathes.

I kiss her hard, my need rushing through me and driving me wild. I worship her breasts as my cock grows hard in my pants. It pushes painfully against the fabric, but I can’t bring myself to release her long enough to release me. Squeezing her flesh in my hands, I kiss my way down her neck.

She sighs in her sleep.

I rip the hospital gown off her, then lean down to suckle on her breasts.

I shove my face in between the two of them.

Turning my head left and right, I kiss and nibble and lick.

As I latch my lips over her left nipple, I groan.

Grabbing her right tit, I push it into my mouth too.

I swirl my tongue around both her erect buds.

My balls draw tight.

And without even touching myself, I come so fucking hard.

I sag against her, breathing heavily. I don’t stop sucking on her breasts. Trailing my hands down her body, I slip under the folds of her fat and search for her pussy. Scooping the cum out of my boxers, I push it into her.

“I love you,” I rasp against her skin. Sucking on her nipples harder, I push my seed inside her. “I love you. I’ve killed for you already, baby. And I’ll die for you, I swear. I’ll be whatever monster you need.”

I wish we weren’t in a car. I want to lie her down and fuck her slowly. I want to bury my tongue in between her spread thighs.

She doesn’t remember anything I did to her, and she called me a monster out of love.

I hate how I ever doubted her understanding of me.

Of course she loves me unconditionally.

Of course I could never rape her.

She’s mine.

We belong together.

Letting her nipples pop out of my mouth, I lean up to kiss her lips. Summer sighs into me, her very breath filling my lungs.

“I love you,” I murmur between each kiss. A dozen marks on her flesh. “I love you.”

Pulling away from her, I scoot out of the car and cross to her door. I open it, that action resonating in my chest. Opening up my heart to her. Feeling her love embrace me. How could I have ever doubted?

That must’ve been my own self-sabotage talking. The demons trying to force me from my angel. It wasn’t the truth; it was just hateful words. The truth is the beauty in front of me.

My goddess.

My future wife.

“You’re the monster who saved me. I love you, Rath.”

Shoving my pants down to my knees, I rub my thumb over the S on my skin. Then I cup her head with my other hand and pull her face down to the head of my cock.

I groan as I watch it disappear into her mouth.

I push deeper into her throat. My balls grow tight as I imagine licking her pussy.

Then falling asleep in her arms. Waking up to her smile.

Traveling the world with her by my side so I can show her off on every continent.

In every fucking city. Shout it from every rooftop in the world.

“Fuck you feel so good, baby… So right… I love you so fucking much.” I slam in balls deep with a rasp. She moans with a full mouth.

Holding her to my pelvis, I fist my hand in her hair. With a feral growl, I rupture inside her mouth. My head falls back as I gasp. She’s swallowing my cock so goddamn well, her throat tightening and causing me to shiver.

She starts to cough, so I pull out of her to let her breathe. Tilting my head down, I smile, expecting to see her love looking up at me.

But instead, there is horror.

Disgust.

Shame.

Panic.

Terror.

Spitting out my cum, my beautiful angel looks up at me.

And screams.