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CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

LEVI

Owen

Want to come over on Saturday? We’re having a few people over for lunch, and we never get to hang out anymore.

Levi

Yeah, I’d love to. Can I bring anything?

Owen

Just yourself, and YAY!

Are you okay with it being a playdate, too? If you’re not okay, we’ll all stay big. Really want to see you.

Levi

Playdate is fine, and I’ll see you there.

Owen

Double yay, and see you then

* * *

I pulled up outside Owen and Barrett’s house, but then I just sat in my car for a while. Other cars were already in the driveway and on the street, so I knew I’d have to go in at some point, but I dreaded it.

My bright spot today was seeing Nico when he came over for his morning spanking. Between the dark circles under his eyes and the strain along his mouth, I was worried about him. He’d said he wanted out, and I was doing my goddamn best to respect it. But as far as I could tell, he wasn’t spending wild nights with anyone.

The blessing and curse of being Nico’s landlord is that I could keep tabs on his comings and goings. With the weather being nice, I’d been working in the yard a lot in the evenings, and he was coming home from work at his regular time. The only difference I’d seen was the bulging of his bag when he was bringing home extra work, but he wasn’t leaving to go out and nobody was coming over. I wasn’t sure how this freedom was better, but I hoped he got something out of it.

“Hey, Levi,” Owen said when he tapped on my window. I wasn’t expecting anyone and nearly jumped out of my skin. I moved to open my door, but he stopped me and indicated to roll down the window instead. “Oh, I was worried I wouldn’t catch you before you got out of your car. Our neighbor is a stickler about where people park on the street. Would you mind parking just around the corner over there? Those neighbors don’t care at all.”

“No problem.” I followed Owen’s attention to my front seat and the bag there. “You said I didn’t need to bring anything, but it seemed rude not to contribute. Anyway, hope you like carrot cake.” It was beyond dumb, but I knew it was Nico’s favorite. He wouldn’t be here, but I could pretend for a second that I was buying it for him. Unfortunately, manifesting wasn’t the same as conjuring.

Once properly moved and parked around the corner, I checked my watch. I’d been here when he first moved in a few months ago, but I hadn’t spent much time here since then. Barrett had been his best friend since college and I knew Owen from our hometown, so we’d been friendly through the years. I was happily surprised but not shocked when they finally got together. But Owen was practically giddy these days and Barrett was all smiles. Happiness looked good on them.

The door was open when I got to the porch, and I heard voices inside, so I walked in without knocking. I followed the noise into the kitchen, where I found Owen and Barrett unwrapping containers. The bags on the counter said Stone and Vine. Yay for us because their food was delicious.

“Hey, I let myself in.” Barrett and Owen both turned when I spoke.

“Yeah, of course. Welcome,” Barrett said. He kissed Owen on the temple and then handed him a bag. “Sweetheart, can you please put that on the table for me?” Owen nodded and headed to the table with the paper plates and napkins in hand. Barrett turned back to me and said, “We’re doing it casual today.”

“If you’re feeding me something I didn’t have to cook myself, then I’m keeping my mouth shut about what it’s served on.”

“It’s been a while since you’ve stopped by. How are things at the firm?” Well, shit, this was awkward. I guess I’d forgotten to tell Owen about me being fired.

“Funny you should ask because I don’t work there anymore.”

“Did you decide to go out on your own shingle?”

“If by that you mean did I get fired and now need to figure out what to do with the rest of my life, then yes.”

“Oh shit. Are you serious?”

“Yeah, we…uh…had a difference of opinion on how to handle a case, so we decided to part ways.”

“That was quite the lawyer-esque answer.”

“Being one probably helps with that.”

“Does that mean you really are going to open your own office?”

“Meh, I haven’t decided yet. The good news is it gives me a chance to consider whether I want to keep doing family law. Adoptions and surrogacy contracts are the best part of it, but those don’t happen as frequently as divorces.”

Our conversation was interrupted by a noise from the living room. Barrett chuckled, nodded his head in that direction, and gave me a knowing look. I followed behind him to a living room that had been transformed.

When Owen warned me there would be a playdate along with lunch, I expected them to be rolling around with some cars on the floor or maybe a little bit of coloring. What I found were boys who had decided that they were going to go camping on this rainy weekend, so there was a pretend fire made with felt logs and flame in the middle of the floor. Around that, they’d arranged brightly colored pillows in a ring, and on top of each one was a blanket and a stuffie. They’d also strung rainbow-colored twinkle lights around the room that shined brightly on the overcast day. In between all of that were brightly colored streamers, but I had no clue what they were supposed to represent. The entire effect was beautiful.

The boys were gathered in the corner near the catio entrance and sitting cross-legged on the floor. Perched between them were two cats that preened and purred under their attention. The teeny-tiny black one was Elizabeth, who I’d met before, but the giant Maine coon with molted brown fur was a recent edition.

I recognized Rory’s soft red curls, Owen’s tidy dark hair, and Anders’s braided bun supervising the group. It was the other dark-haired boy that stopped the air in my lungs. There on the floor was the sweet boy who’d hugged me this morning, thanked me for spanking him, and then slipped out the kitchen door until tomorrow morning.

Fuck, I missed him. When he’d walked away from me at that club, I’d desperately wanted to chase him. I’d promise him anything…any fucking thing in the world I had the power to grant him…if he’d stay with me and figure out where this thing could go with us. But I knew him well enough to know that chasing would send him running. If I quietly left the door open, I hoped he’d come back to me.

I hoped. I really, really fucking hoped so.

Did I love him? Yes, of course, because he was fucking lovable. Nico was funny, sassy, organized his work to the nth detail but otherwise lived like a cyclone, and took his Nonna on dates.

My hands itched to touch him, hold him, and whisper in his ear how much I’d missed him. Our mornings together were the most torturous torture I’d ever put myself through, and I’d do it again until infinity if it meant I got to spend that thirty minutes with him. I was transfixed to see him so unguarded while he spoke softly to the cats because I wanted this for him every goddamn day.

“I knew I’d lose you to the kitties, baby,” Barrett said as he also leaned down to scratch a cat’s ears.

“Uncle B, you gotta be nice to Owen. He loving the kitties,” Nico said indignantly. That was a new development, but I liked that he’d let his guard down with this group. They wanted him to be a part of it if he’d let them.

“It’s okay, Nico. Uncle Barrett was just teasing,” Gabe called from across the room. Rory, ignoring his Daddy, gave Barrett the evil eye and softly encouraged Owen to keep petting the cats. Nico gave Barrett the exact same look. “Owen, you ’tay here. ’lizabeth likes your pets.”

Owen glanced over to Nico and smiled sweetly. I’d never seen him in little space, and I was floored. It had been such a struggle for him to share that part of himself with others. I knew, without being told, that today’s invitation was a big step forward in that journey for him. I was honored to be included. Nico wasn’t the only one taking giant steps.

“Nico, I think Hexe likes you,” Anders observed. Hexe had moved his giant body onto Nico’s lap and settled in. His purr was louder than a diesel truck. I put my hands in my pockets so I wouldn’t touch Nico. That wasn’t enough, so I moved across the room and sat in an easy chair that gave me an unobstructed view of him.

Nico murmured low into Hexe’s ear, which twitched as if he understood what he was saying. Every once in a while, the cat looked over his shoulder and stared directly at me with narrowed eyes. It was disconcerting. I resisted the urge to do a quick Google search on how many people had been merc’d by Maine coon cats. The number might be low, but it would not be zero.

“Owen, you want your kitty back?” Nico’s voice was soft and sweet. Owen’s responding smile matched his vibe as he shook his head and reached out to scratch Hex’s ears. “Okay, I keep him for a second. Ooh, his fur is so soft here, you feel it.” Nico gently grasped Owen’s hand and brought it down softly onto Hexe’s back.

Owen had shared before that he was deeply regressed in his little space, almost to the point of an infant. Watching Nico treat him with such gentleness and kindness swelled my heart with pride. For all his bombastic behavior, at his core, Nico cared deeply about other people. I couldn’t understand why he thought other people didn’t care about him, or maybe he just refused to let people care about him. Either way, in his most unguarded moments, I saw the tender heart he tried so hard to hide.

Barrett gave up on Owen helping him set the table and returned to the kitchen while the boys all stayed on the floor and played with the cats. Nico hadn’t noticed me yet, but Gabe and Anders certainly had. For his part, Gabe looked confused, likely about why I was there. On the other hand, Anders gave me sidelong searching looks instead. He looked guilty as hell. He knew why I was there.

This was a setup.

The only real question was whether Nico was in on it. He’d given nothing away this morning. He hadn’t appeared more nervous, and he hadn’t mentioned where he was going this afternoon or asked where I was going. In fact, Nico hadn’t said anything. He’d slipped into the house, come and found me upstairs, and crawled across my lap. We hadn’t exchanged any words after the spanking. I’d dried the tears on his cheeks and he’d given me a bear hug. Maybe it’d been tighter than normal, but I chalked that up to my imagination.

When Anders whispered in Nico’s ear, I knew my question would be answered. Whatever Anders said caused Nico to jerk his head up and whip it around in my direction with shocked eyes. Mystery solved. This was a scheme concocted by at least one of the boys, but more likely all of them.

Hexe meowed sharply and shifted so he was standing on his hind legs with his front paws on Nico’s shoulders. He gently patted Nico’s cheeks while his meow softened in tone and volume. Nico’s shoulders visibly dropped while his breathing returned to a steady pace. His attention returned to the cat and he began petting him again. I didn’t make any move to join him or interfere but just watched. Christ, I missed him. These past few weeks had left him with dark circles under his eyes and a downturned mouth.

“Lunch is served. Boys, I need you to go wash your hands,” Barrett said when he came back into the room from the kitchen.

“And that means you can’t touch the cats after you wash your hands,” Gabe added.

“Daddy, if the kitty sad, we gotta pet the kitty,” Rory sassed. In response, Gabe crossed the room and booped him on the nose. Rory’s giggle was the surest sign that Rory had absolutely no fear of his Daddy. In the meantime, Anders glanced back at me and then once again whispered something in Nico’s ear. Hexe meowed a few things too and licked Nico’s hand. In response to whatever Anders said, and maybe the cat, Nico unfolded himself from the floor and made his way over to me. Hexe was hot on his heels.

Nico dropped to the space between my legs and leaned against my knee. Hexe settled back in his lap and resumed his nonstop purrs. Finally, I was able to touch him as I wanted. My fingers threaded through his hair while we soaked in each other’s company. The others read the room and left us alone to get reacquainted.

“I’ve missed you, sunshine.” I didn’t expect an answer back from him.

“Missed you too, Babbo.”

“You been taking care of yourself?” Nico shrugged his answer. “Going to your mom’s for dinner?” Another shrug. “Going to bed with Wormie and Saffy and getting your sleep? You get awful grumpy when you don’t get enough sleep.” Same non-response. “Keeping up with work?” Finally, a head nod. “Have you let yourself be little?” A head shake was his answer this time.

“Babbo, I so tired.”

“I know, baby. Babbo’s here, and you don’t have to be a grown-up anymore.”

* * *

I’m not sure how long we sat privately in the living room, but it had to be at least fifteen minutes before Anders stuck his head in the doorway and said it was time for lunch. Nico made no move to get up, and I jostled my knee a little bit to make sure he was awake.

“Baby, it’s time to eat lunch.”

“Sit with you, Babbo.”

“I wouldn’t let you sit anywhere else.” Nico moved a little so I could stand and then grasped my hand so I could pull him up from the ground. Hexe twirled around Nico’s legs as we made our way into the dining room, where everyone waited for us.

At the table, I pulled out one of two adjacent chairs that had been saved for us. The other couples sat next to each other, with the littles having divided plates and their Daddies’ regular paper ones. The only person here alone was Anders. I thought Nico had mentioned something about him having a boyfriend, but I wouldn’t ask where he was. Nico had also mentioned that Anders was one of the nicest guys he had ever met, and he was hopeful he’d eventually find someone as great as he was.

“Gentlemen, dig in. We’ve got chowder, fish and chips, and salad.”

All the Daddies started preparing their little ones’ plates before serving themselves. It was sweet to see how accepting they were of each other. Even Owen, who didn’t seem to speak much when he was in little mode, was interacting with everyone. Rory was being silly and sassing his Daddy. Anders warned Rory he was gonna get it, but he seemed unconcerned.

“Is Reed working today?” I asked as we passed around the platter of fried fish.

“Yeah, he is. They’re gonna come over after he gets off shift. It’s why they’re waiting to have their camping in the woods afternoon. So Jakob can join them.”

“Daddy, Jakob said to save dessert for him, but he didn’t care about the veggies,” Rory said.

“I’m sure Jakob’s Papa has some thoughts about that, but we’ll be sure to save him dessert, just in case.”

Barrett gave Owen the opportunity to feed himself, but he played with it until his Daddy told him to get started before it got cold. Owen, ever the sweet boy, obediently shoved the french fry in his mouth and gave his Daddy an innocent grin. Barrett just shook his head and handed him another one.

With the platters came around to us, Nico pointed to the fried fish and then to his plate.

“Sunshine, you have to use your words.”

“Fishy.” I gave him a look with a raised eyebrow. “Peas.” I began to plate his lunch.

“You want the Italian for your dressing?”

“No.”

“No dressing?”

“No salad. It yucky.”

“No salad, no fries.”

“Baaabbo, dat’s mean.”

“Is that your Daddy’s name, Nico?” Rory asked from across the table, I think in an effort to distract Nico from getting in trouble.

I held my breath to see how Nico was going to answer. “Yeah, Babbo my Daddy.” Rory nodded his understanding and returned his attention to his food.

A commotion at the front door announced the arrival of Jakob and Reed. Always animated, Jakob burst into the room with an exaggerated wiggle of his butt and a twirl. He was sunbeams and rainbows and dressed as brightly as both. His blond curls bounced around his head. I wasn’t sure if he was most excited about his friends or the food because he seemed equally enthusiastic about both. While Reed said hello to the Daddies around the table, Jakob made the rounds, giving hugs to his friends.

When Jakob got to Nico, he asked cautiously if he could give him a hug. The hesitancy answered any doubt about whether Nico was in on the purpose of our lunch.

Magic Eight Ball says very doubtful.

Nico accepted the hug with a fierce grip, and Jakob gripped him tightly back.

“Nico, you ’kay? You mad?”

“Not mad. I tired,” Nico answered.

It wasn’t clear how these boys had orchestrated this, but I was grateful they had. Nico would likely push back later when he wasn’t exhausted, but for now, he was letting himself accept the softness being offered. His usual MO was to rebel against it to be as independent as possible. But today, he’d accepted it.

“Jakob, come sit and eat,” Reed instructed. “You told me the entire way over that you were going die on the spot from hunger.” Jakob gave one more quick hug to Nico and then obeyed his Papa.

The table talk turned to summer vacations and politics. The boys were silly and eager for dessert. Their Daddies worked to get some vegetables in them before giving in and letting them run roughshod over the idea. Next to me, Nico picked at his food without eating much. His droopy eyes spoke to just how little he’d been sleeping.

I knew him well enough to know he’d never let his work suffer but would always take it out on his personal life. He didn’t need a wild afternoon playdate. He needed a bath, quiet time, and a nap.

“Baby, you need some sleep. We are going home, and you’re going to take a nap.”

“No, I wanna play.” His mutinous expression was coupled with crossed arms.

“Little boy, you’re exhausted, and I’m not going to argue,” I whispered in his ear. “I know you want to stay, but you should’ve thought about that when you decided to work yourself to the bone and not take care of yourself. Since you haven’t, I will.” Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Gabe nod firmly in agreement. I’d intended to keep my voice down but failed.

That spurt of sass was all he had in him. Nico was too worn to do more than nod after that. If my boy couldn’t take care of himself, then I was stepping in whether he liked it or not.