Page 74 of Judas (The Lito Duet #2)

Chapter thirty-six

Havok

S ince starting the explanation of what happened in the pit, though some of the details are still blurry, Nadia has put clothes on.

I understand why she doesn’t want me to kill Lucien.

He played a part in her losing herself, and fracturing me right down the middle.

Ever since then, the anger and desperation to keep Nadia safe took over each aspect of my life.

Nadia has since closed the distance. Managing to yank on a pair of sweats from a random drawer, she’s now curled in my lap.

I can’t hold onto her hard enough; half because I’m scared to hurt her again, half because the anger inside of me still isn’t done taking care of the remaining pieces that fucked her up.

Her dad? The lawyer told her he died because of the cancer he was stricken with.

Eventually it would have put him under but it wasn’t fast enough for my likings.

So, I had his medication laced with cyanide.

He went into cardiac arrest at his radiology appointment.

Sloppy, but they ruled it as natural causes due to his treatment.

Warren? Well, Fury handled that like a champ.

Still waiting for her to call on me to return the favor.

The small tab Nadia racked up with her? Added it to mine.

Nadia will never have to take part in violence when this is all said and done.

She gets to live the rest of her life being a mother and supporting our daughter.

Thankfully her circle was small; when those two were out of the picture, I picked off Lucien’s dad next and another clergy member for simply witnessing me murder his old man.

After that, the Cartel yanked me off the street.

Matias set up the connection and got me where I needed to be, but those kills were personal.

It wasn’t until I went through training that I turned into the machine I am today.

More, there’s always more for me to confess—I need to keep going.

Pressing a kiss to her head, tears slick across my chest and her face, I maintain a lower tone.

“Yes, baby, I’ve curated every aspect of your life since then. Matias got me to Xavier. Xavier gave me the shelter and help I needed, just like I said. From there, Fury—“

She cuts me off. “F… fuck, not Fury too. W… was anyone in my life th… there because they… wanted to be?” Her words are broken up by desperate attempts to breathe through sobbing.

“You fostered friendships on your own, Nadia. I only facilitated the meeting. Fury’s job was to protect you and she still would have, regardless if you were friends or not.”

She doesn’t object to that. I’m sure this is overwhelming as hell, considering the situation we’ve been in for days now and the months since she went to her release hearing.

“Xavier got a hold of my mom and told her what happened to the both of us. She still believes that I’m dead, which it has to stay that way.

All of this kicked off the second you were taken into custody, but I didn’t find out about your pregnancy until later.

My mom took care of everything. Made sure you had plenty of money on your books, even paid off all of your remaining medical debt. ”

Nadia jolts with small shakes, her breaths sharp, and my heart aches more. By the time she escapes me and our life, there won’t be anything left.

I’m about to check on her when she mumbles, “Ironic.”

“Hmm?”

“Always wondered how I had money. The fact that your mom put it on my books, when I would steal yours… it’s just kinda ironic.”

“Ahh, yeah. Very.”

“Kace? Did she watch my trial?”

Goddamnit.

My head leans back for a second, searching the ceiling for better answers than the one I had. When it doesn’t provide, I just let it come out.

“Yes. I don’t know her opinion on it, but I know she watched it.

She grieved me heavily for years, and still does from time to time.

So does my sister. My dad? He’s… well, he’s fucked up, too.

Blames himself for leaving his son without a proper parental figure.

He chose to leave and my mom was a good woman.

There’s nothing inherently wrong with me, he didn’t see it that way. ”

“Oh,” she responds. Disappointment evident in how she speaks. I wish I had more for her. We just can’t go back to that life; not only because the judge said I couldn’t if I agreed to the pardon, but being a ghost will cause a whole lot of ruckus.

“Sorry, love. When they found out about Sadie, they made sure she wanted for nothing—well, at least the things money can cover. They didn’t want to interfere with her life, only wanted to make it less stressful and to honor your wishes. Little did they know.”

“So, what… what did they do then?”

“Mom’s covered all of Sadie’s psychologist appointments and medication. The therapist said her father’s insurance paid for everything. But when I pulled up the accounting records, he hasn’t had insurance on her since she was about seven years old. He kept it on him and Victoria, but not Sadie.”

“That’s when the voices showed up, isn’t it…” her now softer voice trails.

“Yeah, according to her medical records,” I answer. My hands idly run up and down her back and one thigh to keep her grounded and comfortable with me.

“What else did they throw money at? Sounds like that’s what they do to fix problems rather than addressing them. They could have fought for custody.”

“Dad has a college fund set up for her and for other kids like her in Michigan. All anonymous. Wherever they go to school, it will be a full ride, Sadie included. If that’s what she wants, of course. Should she rather travel the world and drag us with her, it will happen.”

“How?”

“That part I can’t disclose, baby. Please don’t fight me on it. I’ll never tell you. Not because I don’t think you can’t handle it, you absolutely could, just want to keep you safe. All I’ve ever wanted.”

A sigh lets me know she’s not going to press. Thank the fucking stars.

“They also paid for all of your legal representation. Through the trial and until you were released. Uh, additionally…”

“Alright, I don’t like the fucking sound of that,” Nadia blurts, hopping off my lap like I’m a fucking snake.

She’s on her feet, standing just a few feet away from me, hands on her hips that have widened from her pregnancy.

Even if she’s annoyed right this second, my dick stirs.

I can’t help how my anatomy responds to her—she’s got a hold on me.

A proverbial leash around my neck that I take off and use on her any time we’re naked.

Settling back on the bed, my palms pushed into the bedding, knees wide and relaxed while she paced.

Her mind is working overtime to figure out what I’m going to say next—if there’s anything I can promise her, it’s that she will get it wrong.

I wove this web, built this life, and I’ll be the master of it until I’m damn well and ready to let go of the control.

When Nadia stops roving around, her arms cross her chest and the eyes I’ve dreamt about narrow and wait for me to finish. Taking the cue, I do just that.

“The information you’d get on Sadie? The adoption was technically open, but the Wilson’s never attempted to connect with you when they were supposed to.

Said your record as a convicted sex offender was problematic, therefore a judge ruled in their favor.

Mom instructed the lawyer not to disclose it to you because she was going to deliver whatever information you wanted.

So, that’s what she did—funneled everything to you. ”

Nadia deflates when I’m done.

“Oh, is that all?”

Smart ass.

“Yes, Snitch. That’s all. Everything else, is all you.”

“So, Ra and Ez? That wasn’t something you did?”

“Who?”

Please tell me she isn’t talking about the fucker who put her up in this apartment—who had his mouth on her. I still owe her punishment for that.

“They’re brothers. Said Fury was having them help me. When you said you…”

“No,” I clip my response to her. Irritation begins to take up too much space in my chest for her to finish that sentence. I’d never send a man to help her, not when I knew she was hurt by them. Doctors, therapists, friends in prison, her lawyer, all women.

“Ka—“

I cut her off this time. “Mind what you’re about to say to me, Nadia. This conversation is going in a dangerous direction.”

“How are you going to get pissy with me when you’re part of the reason I’m in this fucking apartment as it is?”

Suddenly, I lean forward and snatch the front of her shirt. Yanking her, my opposite hand grabs her face and drags her down to me. Her pupils instantly narrow to small pinpricks, her breaths become labored, and both nostrils flare— fear .

“He touched what’s mine. Doesn’t matter that I am dead. You’re still mine and I will erase him. Therefore it’s wise that you do not test me Nadia.”

“That’s not fair, Kace, and you know it.”

“Don’t give a good goddamn. I’m dead on paper—not in your heart, mind, and body. Now, do you want to finish the storytelling or keep flirting with a part of me you’ve not quite taken well to?”

“F… fine,” she stammers.

Releasing her face, she stands back up. My other fist still clenches the front of her shirt. The skin of her cheeks have turned a light pink from where I was holding her so damn hard. I’ll beat myself up over that later; another thing to add to the list of shit that will never happen to her again.

“What else do you want to know, baby?”

“Where is Matias?”

“Chicago.”

“Where do you live now?” my sassy brat asks, raising a brow at me.

“We live in Scranton, Pennsylvania.”

“You and Babel?”

“No, baby. Babel is from Oregon. You, me, and Sadie. We live in Scranton.”

“O…oh. Why there?”

“Are we playing twenty-one questions? Cause if you really don’t care about those small details, we can do something else.”