Page 3 of Into the Dawn (The Devil’s Claw #3)
3
VANESSA
“ Y ou can't go charging in there, Ben. They'll kill you.”
Lying on my back, I stare up at the dark inside of the shell covering the bed of his truck and fight back the panic I feel at his ridiculous plan. A remnant of carpet tossed in the back protects my back from the metal, and thankfully, I have enough room to stretch out my legs. Resting them against the side of the truck top, I sigh. He has no idea how bad things have gotten in the compound, and the type of people he’s dealing with now.
Ben and I are like strangers, talking to each other from either side of the barrier, when once, we were best friends. And then, when we got a little older, we realised why we were so drawn to each other… we are mates. Were mates? I don’t know what we are now, other than broken.
How did things get so fucked up?
Or should I say, how have I managed to fuck things up so spectacularly, once again?
Bringing my hands to my face, I rub the rough rope against my eyebrow and try to push away a strand of loose hair that’s tickling my skin. I’m hot, sweaty, and the smell of damp hiking equipment is driving me crazy.
“What do you expect me to do? Just let you go, head back to Sutton and get on with my life knowing that John is stuck somewhere with your fucked up, inbred family keeping him prisoner? That's not gonna happen.”
Ben’s anger is palpable, like a living thing sucking in all the surrounding air and leaving me struggling for breath. I don’t blame him. I’m angry too. I just don’t know what to do about it.
I grit my teeth against the rising urge to struggle in my bindings and escape, just to get away from the cloying atmosphere. But if I run, he’ll never trust me.
He might never soften this hardened attitude he has now, but I’m not going to let anything happen to him. It’s the very least I can do. And to do that, I need him to believe I’m on his side.
“I'm not saying that. I'm just saying you can't storm in there and take John by force. It won’t work. Not without help, without my help. I don't see anybody else here looking to join your stupid mission to get yourself killed.”
And that's what it would be… suicide.
“I'm not getting Evan involved. He has a baby on the way. And a mate now. It’s too dangerous.”
Ben’s words are like a sucker punch. His wayward brother is starting a family, the man that nobody thought would even make it to his twenties without ending up in jail or dead has the family that was supposed to be ours.
Envy and loss hit me in a devastating double blow, and I can barely breathe, let alone speak.
He’s got the life I wanted.
Not that I don’t think Evan deserves it, he had it tough too. But when we were younger, he always said he didn’t want it, and now it seems it’s just fallen into his lap.
When I don’t comment, Ben continues. “So he's out. And Jack… Jack's a gentle giant most of the time. He’s not even from Sutton, so this isn’t his fight. He's already helped me more than he should’ve. It's not fair to drag him into it. And Henry. Well, he’s the law now. He’d have to do things by the book.”
And that won’t work. The first hint that the police are looking at them, and Jed will kill John. There’s no doubt in my mind.
“Kali's still recovering. I can't ask her to risk her life again, either.”
Irritation makes me squirm. As if I’m suggesting he drags any of those people into a battle with my family. They’re far too violent, and there’s far too many of them to take on in a normal fight. Any plan we come up with needs to be cleverer than that.
“I'm not talking about them . I'm talking about me . I can help you.”
I can almost hear Ben’s confusion as the penny finally drops.
“Oh no, no, no.” Ben chuckles, having the actual audacity to laugh at my offer, before his voice cuts through the darkness once more, sounding offended by my suggestion. “You think I'm gonna trust you to help me? No way. You’d just leave me in the lurch again.”
The words cut deep but they’re not undeserved.
“I might now know where John is now,” I say, desperately trying to come up with words that will convince him not to do something insanely dangerous. “But I can find out if you let me go.”
Ben laughs again. “Or I could keep you and try to arrange a swap.”
Now he’s just being ridiculous. “They’ll kill him the second they know you’re on to them, you know they will.”
The first sign of anyone looking in their direction for John’s disappearance, and they’ll get rid of the evidence.
“Then what’s your genius idea?” Ben’s scepticism is jarring. I’m used to him being on my side. Or, he always used to be, until I ruined it all. “I’m supposed to just sit tight and do nothing? While you leave me in the lurch, as per fucking usual.”
I press the heels of my hands against my eyeballs and pray for patience. He doesn’t want to listen, he just wants to argue and snipe at me.
“If you let me pretend that I caught you, they'll lock you up in the same place. I know it. Jed wouldn’t be able to resist. And even if they don’t show me where the prison is, I’ll be able to find it. Then we can work out how to get you both free.”
I don’t say the words, but Ben knows that’s because my beast could find her mate anywhere. If I want her to. Our bond might be weak but it’s still there, and she wouldn’t rest until she found him if she thought he was in danger.
“They’ll think I’m a hero. Dad will let me back into the compound, and when they’re distracted, I’ll help you escape.”
I know it won’t be as easy as that, but I can do it. It could work.
“An inside job,” Ben murmurs, as he lets the idea percolate in his brain. I hold my breath, waiting for his verdict. It’s far from perfect, and there are a million reasons why this plan wouldn’t work, but nothing matters except this one fact: My mate’s life will be in my hands, and I’d die before I let them hurt him.
“It's a terrible plan, really,” he says quietly, but I can hear the smile in his voice. “Letting the ex that screwed me over once before march me right into the enemy's lair.”
I bristle at being called the ex but keep my mouth shut. Although I still consider Ben my mate, he clearly doesn’t feel the same way.
“I’d be waltzing straight into a clan full of vengeful lunatics who hate me with every ounce of their bodies, and allowing myself to be taken hostage without even knowing if I'll be kept in the same place as John.”
It doesn’t sound great when you describe it like that, but I’ll make sure he gets out. This might be the only chance I have to redeem myself, and I’m not going to screw it up.
“And to top it all off, I’d be relying on you, YOU, to let me out. When you have a prior history of not coming through for me.” Ben’s words are bitter, but he seems amused by the situation. “And yet, it's the only plan I've got.”
I wait with bated breath for his decision while my brain scrambles to find an alternative option that might work if he says no. But I can’t come up with anything better, or less dangerous.
“Fine,” Ben says finally, coming to the same conclusion that this is probably the best bad option he has.
“Really?” I whisper, “You're gonna let me help you?”
This is positive. Progress, even. If I help Ben get John back, maybe he’ll forgive me. Or just not hate me so much. Even that would be a win.
“Yeah alright, but if you fuck me over this time, Vanessa, I swear to god, I'll kill you.” Ben warns, his tone laced with an icy coldness I’ve never heard from him before. “Mate or not, I'm not the same guy you ditched. You changed me, little mate, and now, my family is all I care about. I will find a way to fucking end you if you hurt John and prevent our escape.”
He takes my silence as my agreement but I’m still hung up on the fact that I’m not part of this family that he’ll go to the ends of the earth to protect. And how that’s my own damn fault.
Outside, I hear a door creak, and then heavy boots hitting the dirt.
When he lifts the lid, I squint up at him, the fading sunlight hurting my eyes after so long in the dark.
Ben is silhouetted by the sunset, his brown wavy hair highlighted with hints of amber light. He’s looking as handsome as ever. I raise my bound hands, shielding my face, allowing me to see him better and relish the joy I feel just being near him again, even if the situation is slightly less than ideal.
Just like when we were teenagers, the butterflies start in my belly at the mere sight of him. When he reaches down and grabs me by the knot binding my wrists, keeping them tightly together, I gasp. The tiniest brush of our skin sends tingles dancing across my palms and it feels so good.
Ben’s eyes lock onto mine, his jaw tense, and it feels like it was only yesterday that we were sitting on that porch, giddy as hell about starting a new life away from all the drama of our family’s hatred of one another.
“This isn’t how I thought we'd end up,” I say, breaking the trance we’re both in, regret clogging my throat and making it hard to speak.
Ben clears his throat, blinking hard, before he yanks me out of the truck with one pull, roughly shoving me toward the soft grass nearby. “You're fucking telling me.”