Page 21 of Ink and Ashes

All I know is that she’s the reason my life has turned upside down over the past few weeks.

But resenting her for pointing this out isn’t going to make the reality of the situation any less tangible.

I still don’t know that I believe someone could be directly responsible for the fires, but I also never thought someone would leave Holland a note threatening her life.

She was right to lash out at me the way she did. I would’ve if I were her too. She’s proven to me time and time again that she’s not giving up, and nothing I do has deterred her. In fact, I think my resistance has only made her want to work harder.

Exactly as she said it would.

“You okay, Lieutenant?” Finn asks, pulling me from my thoughts.

“Huh?” I ask, focusing on him. The rest of the group continues their conversation, while Finn is dialled in on me. “Yeah, sorry. Just distracted. How’re Julie and the girls?” I ask, referring to his wife and daughters, Brianna, who’s eight, and Hailey, who’s six.

His face lights up, and my heart clenches. I used to dream of having a family like his, of loving someone as much as he loves Julie, of having mini versions of the love of my life running around. But I’ve come to accept that’s not in the cards for me anymore.

“They’re great. Girls are happy it’s almost summer vacation, and I’m looking forward to spending more time with them. With all the fires lately, I feel like I’ve barely seen them. ”

I huff a laugh. “And yet you’re here at the bar when you could be home with them,” I joke.

Finn shakes his head with a smile. “I just wanted to pop in to talk to you for a sec. I’m heading straight home to my girls after this.”

“Good man,” I say with a nod. “What did you wanna talk about?”

He exhales. “She’s not going away, is she?”

My brows pull together. I should’ve known Finn would see through Beau’s attempt at a lie about Holland leaving.

He’s the most observant guy on the team, often noticing things well before anyone else does.

He’s always been five steps ahead of the rest of us, so it’s not surprising he saw right through us.

I shake my head, not even bothering to pretend like I don’t know what he’s talking about. Finn is too smart for that. “No, Finn. She isn’t.”

He blows out a breath. “What are you gonna do?”

“I have no fucking idea.”

Finn hums. “She really thinks it’s arson?”

I glance at him out of the corner of my eye. “Yeah. And I’m beginning to think she might be right.”

He inhales sharply. “Well, regardless of whether she is or not,” he starts as he taps me on the shoulder, “I’ve got your back, Lieutenant. We all do.”

“Thanks, Finn.”

He tips his chin, then says his goodbyes to everyone to head home, as promised. I finish my beer, then without another word to anyone, I grab my jacket and follow his lead, leaving the bar.

I pull my keys from my pocket, unlocking my truck and sidling into the driver’s seat.

The cab is quiet on my drive home. I don’t even bother turning on the radio, because I know it won’t help to drown out the thoughts racing through my mind.

Impulsively, instead of turning right onto the street that leads to my house, I continue straight in the direction of The Scarlet.

I need to talk to Holland—apologize for being such an ass and take a minute to really hear her out.

If not for her, then for myself, because I can’t keep letting these questions distract me.

I slow my speed as I pull into the lot of the red-roofed house, but her car isn’t in the lot.

It’s nearing ten p.m., so I have no idea where she could be.

Panic surges through me at the thought she might be in danger.

I don’t know why that’s the first thing that comes to mind, but after the note she got this morning, I can’t help but wonder if whoever’s behind these fires decided to come after her.

Holland isn’t my responsibility. She’s strong, and she knows what she’s doing. But I won’t be able to sleep without knowing she’s safe, so without thinking twice, I reverse out of the lot and turn back in the direction I just came, toward Grove Gazette.

Five minutes later, I pull up out front, only her car isn’t here either and all the lights are off inside. Jaw clenched tight, I give in to my worry and send her a text.

ME

Where are you?

My knee bounces as I wait for her response. I don’t breathe, blink, or move for the entire six minutes it takes for her to read my message. The moment she does, I release a shaky breath. And when her text comes through another minute later, my shoulders fall in relief.

RHODES

Your sister’s. Why are you texting me?

I ponder the question for a minute, trying to come up with a good excuse. After how I treated her this morning, I’m shocked she responded at all, honestly.

It’s nothing, don’t worry about it. Have a good night, Rhodes.

I expect a snarky response back, but that’s not what I get.

Whatever you say, Lieutenant Killjoy.

I huff an anxious laugh as I drop my phone into the cup holder, leaning back against the headrest.

“Get it together, Caldwell,” I mutter to myself as I shift my truck into gear again. But as I do, I spot a dark figure lurking around the side of the building.

My eyes narrow, but just as fast as I saw them, they disappear. I park again, then hop out of my truck, rushing over to where I saw it.

“Hello? Is someone out there?” I call out, but there’s no response. The street is illuminated by my headlights, so I glance around, hoping to see whatever—or who ever—it was, but there’s nothing.

Great. Now I’m seeing things too.

Brows furrowed, I hop back into my truck and this time, I really do head home.

But the feeling that something weird is going on never leaves.