Page 53 of In Sheets of Rain

We did our thing. It seemed to take so much longer than reality — longer than three minutes. We got the kid out. I wrapped up the woman’s gash. The men were transported without incident.

And in my head was an empty space filled up with the child’s silence.

* * *

Isat under a tree on the beach and watched the surf roll in. My journal lay beside me, my chin rested on my up-drawn knees, and happy people strolled past, holding hands, and laughing in the sunshine.

I was a world away. A universe apart from them. I watched them laugh and kiss and throw frisbees for their dogs to catch, and I heard and felt only silence.

When had I become this person? This person I didn’t recognise. When?

* * *

Ichecked the produce department, but my suit guy wasn’t there. I wasn’t sure if I was happy about that or disappointed. I shook my head and pushed my trolley towards the pineapples. Taking my time, I picked up one after the other and held them to my nose, letting their perfume wrap around me.

A long-stemmed rose appeared before my eyes when I was sniffing my twelfth pineapple. The flower was held in the well-manicured fingers of Suit Guy.

“You looked like you might need this,” he said, waving the flower in front of me.

I automatically reached out and took it, staring at the rose and frowning.

“Did you steal this from one of the bouquets in the flower section?” I asked.

“Maybe,” he said. “But desperate times called for desperate measures.”

“They did?”

“You weren’t smiling.”

His words shouldn’t have affected me so much. But the truth can hurt even if said tenderly.

“I suppose next you’ll say ‘a pretty flower for a pretty girl,’” I mused.

“Would that make you smile?”

I screwed up my nose and shook my head. He laughed.

“Live life on the edge, Trolley Girl,” he said and walked away.

He had a name for me. Like I had a name for him.

Suit Guy and Trolley Girl. We sounded like superheroes. I smiled.

I stared at the rose for a long moment and then pushed my trolley back to the flower stand. I couldn’t tell which one of the bouquets he’d pilfered the rose from, so I just grabbed the first I could see and shoved the long stem inside, and then gently placed the bouquet in my trolley.

I completely forgot to buy a pineapple.