Page 38 of In Death’s Hands (The Threads of Fate #1)

“Keep your voice down! We cannot afford to show weakness here.”

My knees snap shut together, the smack of my thighs loud in my ears. I frown, not understanding what happened. But then I catch a glimpse of grey hands, barely there. Nathan’s shadow!

I gape at him, his rejection like acid in my stomach. I try to move but find myself locked by too many hands that do nothing to quench the fire under my skin. I want to cry.

“I don’t know why it’s affecting her so strongly.”

“ What is affecting her so strongly?” seethes Nathan, his voice full of shadows and dark threats.

Atys sighs heavily, seeming to debate something for a second. “Thalnus likes to help his guests feel more at ease.”

“By drugging them?”

“No!” Atys drags a hand over his face. “Humans know and agree to this. It helps them relax amongst our kind. You know how they are, that they can feel that we are… other. It’s like drinking a few glasses of wine for them.

Enough to loosen up, but not enough to rob them of their own mind.

At least”—he looks my way and winces—“not usually.”

“Is it in the food? I don’t think she ate anything.

Did you give her something to drink on purpose?

” The violence in Nathan’s eyes tells me that if he weren’t holding me, he’d be holding on to Atys’ throat, trying to see how long he could block his airway before the guy passed out.

For some reason, that only stokes my desire.

“No! It just… is.”

I don’t understand what that means, but then again, I don’t understand much of what’s happening.

The only thing I’m focused on right now is the feel of those hands on me.

I will them to move, to stroke, but to my eternal disappointment, they stay put.

Although I swear one shadow hand brushes its thumb across my thigh in a soothing fashion.

It’s over before I can be sure, but the gesture leaves a gentle feeling tugging at my heart.

I feel Nathan’s sigh against my too-hot cheeks. He’s like a leashed storm. Powerful. Deadly. Utterly beautiful. “I’m sorry,” he tells me, and confusion has me furrowing my brows. Why would he—

Pain stabs at my head. A scream fights its way out of my throat, but before it can come to life, Atys’ large hand covers my lips, keeping the sound and the pain prisoner.

I lose all senses as a different kind of fire burrows into my skin, into my brain. “I’m so sorry.” I hear Nathan’s strained voice, but I can’t think .

My hands are suddenly free, and I feel his cradling my face. I try to shake off his hold, try to escape the pain, but it doesn’t work.

And then it’s gone.

I stay frozen, scared that one move, one breath, might bring it all back.

What was that? My heart is beating erratically in my chest. I take inventory of my body and feel nothing but Nathan’s hands still holding my face, his fingers stroking my cheeks repeatedly.

“Liv?” he asks, and I open my eyes slightly to see Nathan crouching in front of me.

His face is a mask of agony and shame. Did he do that to me?

I scramble backwards, fleeing them both.

“What—” I swallow, my throat dry and scratchy. “What happened?” I hate the shakiness in my voice.

I look at Nathan, hoping I’m mistaking the look in his eyes. He couldn’t have done that to me. Not when he’s been protecting me since we met.

“I’m…” He stops, swallowing once, twice. “You were affected by this place. Overly so. I… Thalnus’ power covers the grounds, so the only way to get your mind out of that web was to… hijack it.”

What? The question must be written on my face because he keeps going, his eyes not truly meeting my own.

“I sent my shadow into your mind. For a minute,” he adds quickly, “and not completely.”

I don’t even know what to say to that. I think back to what happened and… Oh! I was acting weird. More than weird! For crying out loud, I nearly threw myself at them!

My eyes widen and heat streaks across my face. I turn to leave but am blocked by Atys’ raised hands. “You have nothing to feel bad about, sweet thing. You were not yourself.”

Pushing the embarrassment aside to think about at another time—or never—I whirl on him to jab my finger into his flag-covered chest. “What the hell is wrong with you lot?” Atys shushes me, throwing a worried look around us, probably afraid I’ll blow our cover.

But I can’t find it in me to care at the moment.

“Don’t you dare shush me! You have people here under the influence of that spell?

You’re taking advantage of them!” I vaguely remember him explaining otherwise to Nathan, but I can’t believe that when I was seconds away from touching myself in front of them!

From climbing them both like trees and never letting go.

“It’s not a spell,” he starts, but my glare makes it clear that I don’t currently give a shit about the nomenclature of his world.

I’m sure I will later, but now isn’t then.

“It’s just energy that allows them to relax and to be a little confused about what’s happened once they leave,” he explains in earnest. “Just enough to make them think everything was completely normal here and they simply indulged a little too much. You were unnaturally affected. Trust me, baby. We may have questionable morals, but even we wouldn’t force ourselves on anyone.

Especially when we can find willing playthings easily. ”

Play things . I narrow my eyes at him. “You have no right!” Even as I scream that, I wonder if I’m right.

Don’t they? Don’t they have every single right they want?

Being the gods—the Origins —that they are.

Linked to the very existence of this world, if I understand properly.

Don’t they have every right to do as they please?

“No. We do not,” answers Nathan solemnly.

His eyes are back on mine, his face blank as if he’s pushed aside whatever guilt he clearly felt to face my wrath.

“Our role doesn’t make us omnipotent, although many will try to make you believe that,” he says, throwing a seething look at the man at his side, who appears truly offended by the jab.

“We may know that we’ve been here from the beginning of it all ”—he sneers as he repeats Atys’ own words from earlier—“but we don’t remember it. Not truly.”

I still struggle to grasp what that means. How can they know yet not remember? Nathan told me that it’s an instinct. A knowledge buried so deep inside them that it’s like breathing for a newborn. But it’s still too strange for my human mind to truly understand.

“And even if we did remember,” he continues, “it wouldn’t change the fact that we are servants of this realm. Not owners, and certainly not rulers. Although many of us have grown bored with it and decided to interact more fully with our charges.”

Atys scoffs loudly. “You’re one to talk.”

And the look on Nathan’s face makes me blush.

He broke his own rules to help me out. And he kissed me.

Thoroughly. I hadn’t realised, hadn’t wondered, what consequences it would have for him.

He seemed to enjoy himself whenever we ate together, or I explained something new about humanity to him.

I still remember the look of wonder on his face when he tasted the chocolate cake I ordered after our quiet dinner in his loft.

But I guess he could enjoy himself and still resent me for taking him away from his duties. From what he clearly considers sacred.

That’s another reason to solve our common issues as fast as possible.

I’m loath to think of myself as weak, as needing help when I survived on my own for so long.

Just the thought of having to be saved by Nathan so many times is irksome.

I trained to be strong and independent, but I am no match for secret magical brotherhoods.

I take a deep breath, letting my anger—and embarrassment—slowly ebb away.

I decide that I don’t know enough about them to truly mete out judgement.

What I can do, however, is use my newly rational brain to focus on the plan that will get me back to my life.

I ignore the pang of sadness at that thought to take in where I stand.

No one seems to have heard us, or they’re just too lost in their own partners and lust to care about anything else.

Atys has brought us to an alcove in the farthest corner of the property, one where the green grass slowly turns to sand.

I take a steadying breath and grab their hands, blocking off images and sparks of whatever it is that I felt while wrapped in this place’s magic.

I cross the invisible frontier between Thalnus’ mansion and the beach, removing the painful heels to dip my toes in the fresh, smooth sand.

The moon is bright and lights our way as I take us away from the party.

The moans and soft laughs are replaced by the soft ebb and flow of the water.

The men at my sides stay quiet, either knowing why I’m taking us away from safety or not daring to tell me no after my own will was so violently ripped from me.

We are alone here, and it is… peaceful. So much so that it’s an effort to stay focused on my task instead of falling into the awe that being here brings out in me.

But I will not falter.

Their plan to have us move about in hopes that a member of the Novensiles will try to get to me once more has, so far, been a bust.

I press my hands on their shoulders, making them sit in the sand, facing the water.

I’m not stupid enough to think that my touch alone brought them to their asses.

But they are generous enough to follow my lead.

My heart jumps to an uneven rhythm as I wonder if I’ll have the guts to follow my newly formed plan to its end.

I will not falter , I repeat to myself.