Page 26 of Hunted (Love and Revenge #5)

Dusek stepped closer. His eerie gaze swept over me, studied my face intently, as if he were reading an open book. “He’s not gone—not out of reach. You haven’t lost him.”

“You don’t know that,” I signed violently.

“I know what it’s like to think you’re a monster,” he said slowly, giving me time to read what he was saying.

“I don’t know your struggle. But I understand a little of what Josh might be feeling.

Unlovable. A danger to those he cares for.

” His chest expanded and deflated with a sigh, as if being forced to admit something he loathed saying out loud.

“And... I know what it’s like to be wrong. ”

I stared at him.

He touched my shoulder. Just briefly. Probably afraid of causing terror. “You’re right. You can’t change him back. But maybe that’s not what he needs. Maybe he just needs you by his side.”

I didn’t pull away from the bubak’s bleak aura. I let the fear wash over me and fall away like rain, like swatting away an annoying insect. It was there, but it didn’t have to affect me. The man before me saw me. He saw Josh. He saw so much.

He wasn’t some evil darkness. He was just a man. One with his own share of fears and wounds.

The darkness hovered around us, tendrils of shadow brushing my aura like the curious, questing tentacles of some ocean beast. His deep, patient eyes watched me, waited for.

.. something. For me to scoff at the advice from a creature of terror and darkness, maybe?

What was it he’d said—that he knew what it was like to be wrong.

He thought he was a monster. But he wasn’t.

Something in me cracked.

The next thing I knew, I was kissing him, my hands fisted in the front of his shirt, the animal in me demanding ferocity.

He froze—just for a second, and I feared I was about to get my ass handed to me. But then he responded. Not ferocious or demanding, but not hesitant either. He didn’t give in to my unspoken demands, but he didn’t shrink away. Gamma all the way. I’d laugh, if my mouth wasn’t otherwise occupied.

I felt his hands on my back, his breath against my lips when we broke the kiss... the faint tremble in his aura that told me he hadn’t expected this either.

I kissed him again, not giving him a chance to run away, the way I sensed he might. He answered with heat, and restraint, and something frighteningly close to... tenderness. We pulled apart more slowly this time. His fingers trailed down the front of my t-shirt over my chest, hesitant, careful.

“You’re not afraid of me,” he said quietly, his voice even but clearly hiding some strong emotions. “I thought I could never have this. That the darkness and terror in me was too strong. But you don’t even shiver at my touch.”

I gave him a wry half smile. “I’m an alpha.

I know how to feel fear and not let it distract me.

” I put my hands on his hips, tugging him closer, desperate to preserve the moment.

To keep him from running away, and to keep myself from thinking.

“And don’t worry, I’m sure you’ll make me shiver for other reasons. ”

He quirked a brow at me like he knew I was using him as a distraction from my woes. But he didn’t pull away, his hand sliding back to grip the nape of my neck in a way that both angered and aroused the alpha in me. “Are you sure?” he asked simply.

I wasn’t. I knew I was probably acting impulsively to escape my pain. But I nodded.

We didn’t go far. Just to the edge of the courtyard, near an ivy-covered bench shielded by an old ash tree. He glanced meaningfully toward a nice, manicured patch of grass nearby, like it mattered. Like he respected me enough not to let me kneel in the dirt.

At first, we touched like people not used to touching. Carefully. Testing. Wanting, but knowing the dynamic between us—alpha and nightmare—was something uncharted.

There was nothing rough in it. No dominance, no posturing.

Whenever the urge to play the alpha rose up in me, he simply.

.. tolerated it with the sort of energy that said “I’ll give this to you.

For now. Because I want to.” Pure gamma defiance.

But his touches were also tinged with an edge of hunger.

Clearly, he wasn’t entirely inexperienced.

But I wondered how long it had been since he’d done this.

Since he’d tried to find catharsis and relief—and acceptance—in the grounding touch of another warm, welcoming body.

I urged him to sit on the bench, then lowered myself to kneel between his knees, smoothing my hands over his thighs in silent command.

Not all alphas were dominants when it came to sex.

And while I by no means considered myself submissive.

.. sometimes there was power in giving, in satisfying a partner.

Dusek was gamma enough to push back sometimes when we interacted.

But just now, in this moment, I sensed the need in him.

The quiet longing to experience what everyone else around him took for granted.

“Don’t worry, bubak,” I said, pausing to sign as I undid his fly. “I’ve got you.”

This was what I needed. The alpha beast inside me purred with pleasure. Yes. This we could do. We felt so powerless lately, but we could provide this—safety and belonging for an outcast gamma. Dusek needed me as much as I needed him.

I slipped a hand inside his pants and gripped his long, hard shaft, and he sucked in a breath, his hands gripping the edge of the bench as if he might fly off it.

“Easy,” I murmured, slowly stroking him a few times as I pinned him with my gaze.

“Trust me, Dusek,” I said aloud. I let my alpha influence reach for him, settle into his aura.

Not to coerce, but to comfort. To hold him, so he could let go.

A shiver of fear rippled through me, but I shook it off. A minor thing—like the thrill of fear you get when you first step foot on a particularly daring amusement park ride.

I lowered my head and took him into my mouth, slow and firm, swallowing down his delicious length. He opened his mouth, and I knew he must have let out a groan. His entire body tensed, as if he feared he might fly apart.

I withdrew slowly, only to take him in again, my lips stretched wide and a hum of satisfaction in my throat.

How long had it been since he’d felt these sensations?

Since he’d allowed the touch of a lover?

Had he ever had his cock sucked before? The thought made me feel a bit smug.

I wanted to show off for him. To show him what an amazing alpha I was, and ruin him for anyone else.

For the moment, all my fears, and rage, and insecurities were eclipsed by the overwhelming need to take care of my gamma.

To provide for him. I let my body shift, ever so slightly, and wrapped my long, forked tongue snake tongue around the base of his shaft, dragging it upward as I pulled back.

Dusek’s lean form curled forward and, overcome by the sensations I had evoked, he finally let himself tangle those long fingers in my hair and tug.

I rewarded his trust—in himself and in me—by sucking harder, faster, urging him toward release. His dark aura swelled around us, the shiver of fear over my skin dangerous and thrilling, rising to new levels, threatening to overcome my resistance.

Then, suddenly, he pushed me away.

I obeyed the unspoken request immediately, not wanting him to feel pressured or forced. But it took every ounce of restraint I had to ignore that perfect cock, glistening wet in the dim light, right in front of my face.

He hastily tucked himself away, and appeared to be panting, his chest rising and falling in a way that said he was fighting for calm. “My orgasms tend to send people screaming in terror,” he signed awkwardly. “Kind of ruins the moment.”

I huffed and lifted my hands to sign back. “Challenge accepted.”

“Even just this is a wonder and a gift,” he signed slowly. “Sadavir... you have no idea. But it is enough.” He leaned down and kissed me again, slow and sweet. “Thank you, alpha.”

I didn’t realize I was crying until he touched my cheek to wipe away the wetness there. “I’ve got you,” he said, repeating my earlier promise back to me as he joined me on the ground, pulling me into his arms.

I had failed again. Failed to convince this amazing gamma to let go so I could take care of him.

I couldn’t instill enough trust. My stupid alpha instincts, muddling the water and making a big deal of the whole thing.

But I couldn’t quite push the thoughts away.

The memories and the sense of helpless frustration were back, and they were overwhelming. So much for my attempt at escape.

I never would have expected such steady care to come from Dusek, of all people.

A bubak. A walking nightmare. A gamma. But there was no denying my response to him.

He held me until the trembling stopped. Until the fire in my chest softened and I could talk sense to my alpha side and it’s stupid urge to solve every single problem with sheer presence.

Until the echoes of Josh’s anguished voice inside my mind faded into silence.

I hated it. Hated that I was showing such weakness and vulnerability, when what I had wanted was to take care of someone, to feel like the provider I was supposed to be, just for a moment.

But I forced myself to set that aside. It was a massive show of trust for Dusek to share what we had just shared.

And sometimes even alphas needed help. It was a lesson my father and my tutors had drilled into me from a young age. Being strong didn’t mean you always had to handle things alone. The strongest alpha was one who knew when to lean on his clan.

We didn’t speak for a time. I simply allowed myself a moment to soak in the comfort he offered. And I allowed him the privilege to give it. After all, the experience was probably as rare and unique to him as it was to me.