Page 41 of How to Puck Your Boss (L.A. Hawks Hockey #3)

Chapter Twenty-Four

P enny was going a little crazy.

This was a disaster of only medium proportions.

The picture of her and Jack was more ambiguous than the reporters wanted everyone to believe.

It had been taken outside the hotel that night she’d fallen into Jack’s arms for being the only one listening to her.

The hug was clearly intimate, but not necessarily suggestive of anything more.

Still, it was grounds for the press to suspect that the two had more than a business relationship — and that was bad enough.

Her cell phone hadn’t stopped ringing for an hour. Her mother called. Lucy called. Gareth called. She didn’t know what to say to them, though, so she ignored all the calls before finally turning the phone off completely.

She stood under the shower, letting the hot spray rain down on her body, hoping it would give her some peace. Instead, she felt like she couldn’t breathe properly with all the steam, so she cut it short.

God, she was instantly thrown back five years into the past. The idea that her family would need to make excuses for her again—well, it was the final nail in the coffin that Los Angeles had become for her.

Beyond that, she didn’t care if strangers insulted her.

She didn’t care what reporters thought of her.

She did care that her parents would see the headline and say: We knew it. Penny can’t help it. She hasn’t changed. She needs scandal. She’s smart and a good person, but a little out of her mind!

Nausea surged. It had been stupid to start something with Jack. She knew that. And even more stupid to fall in love with him. But you couldn’t choose who you liked!

As if she had conjured him up with her thoughts, there was a knock at the door and Jack called from outside, “Penny! Are you there? Could you let me in? I called a hundred times, but you didn’t answer.”

Her heart skipped a beat as she hurried down the hall. Was he suicidal ? He shouldn’t be here! What if the reporters had followed him and were at that moment posting more visual evidence on the Internet?

In disbelief, she tore the door open. “What are you doing here?” she asked, shaking her head. “And how did you get through the security door?”

“Security doors aren’t that safe if you leave them open,” he replied tersely, entering and closing the door.

“It was open? But…” She closed her eyes and shook her head. “It doesn’t matter. You shouldn’t be here!”

“Why not?” he asked, confused. “We said we’d meet here after you had a few hours to get groceries.”

“Jack! That was before the picture and the reporters.”

He frowned. “What do they have to do with it? Did you seriously think I’d leave you alone with your worries? You were as pale as a ghost earlier, Penny.”

“That’s just the color of my face when I’m blinded by flashbulbs and insulted from all directions!

And, yes, it would have been better if you’d left me alone!

” she said, her voice growing louder with each word.

“They think we’re having an affair, Jack, but they don’t know it.

That is, until you provide them with more proof! ”

Jack sighed heavily and walked past her into the kitchen. “Nobody has any idea where you live, Penny. I’m not going to stop seeing you just because some reporter took a picture of us hugging!”

He couldn’t be serious. “Um, no, that’s exactly what’s going to happen!”

Jack stopped and slowly turned to her. “Excuse me?”

“Jack, it’s obvious that we need to take a little break.” She thought it was obvious. “We need to put some distance between us so there isn’t a chance that they’ll catch us together. Let’s let things calm down for a while.”

His mouth gaping, Jack appeared totally perplexed—which was admittedly pretty cute. “What are you talking about?” he finally blurted out. “I don’t want any distance.”

She laughed. “Yeah, but we can’t do just whatever we want to do all the time. And right now, everyone is talking about us. Right now, they’re going to come after us, so…we should put the brakes on. At least for the moment. It’s for the best.”

“For who?” he asked sharply, stuffing his hands in his pockets. “And what does that even mean: at least for the moment ? I don’t want to stop seeing you. No at least for the moment about it.”

She swallowed and wrung her hands. Why was he making it so difficult for her? It wasn’t easy for her, to begin with, but it was the simplest solution! If they were caught again now…

“Jack, it’s not forever,” she insisted, her throat dry. “Only until the press loses interest.”

He laughed mirthlessly and gently wrapped his arm around her shoulders. “Penny, the press will never lose interest! If we start now, we’ll have to take a hundred breaks over the next few years. It’ll mean we’re more often not together than the other way around. That’s not enough for me.”

She swallowed and bit her lip before whispering, “Yeah, me neither. So, what should we do?”

“I don’t know.” He let go of her abruptly and ran his hand nervously through his hair. “Just…tell them? Be honest?”

Her eyes widened in disbelief. “What? No. I’ve spent the last few months trying to convince my parents that I’m not the same woman I was back then.

That I don’t cause scandals anymore. That I can be responsible.

That I don’t act impulsively. How will they ever believe me if, within my first two months as manager of the Hawks, I start something with one of the players and end up on the cover of gossip rags for weeks? ”

Jack let out a gasp and narrowed his eyes briefly. “So what? Then that’s how it is.”

“Yeah, easy for you to say!” she snapped angrily.

“It’s not your parents. It’s not your career.

Everyone will probably pat you on the back.

Hey, congratulations on sleeping with the boss!

And me? I’m going to lose the team! I’m going to lose everyone’s respect.

I…” She took a shaky breath. “I’m going to be seen as the ultimate failure again.

And I don’t want to fail again, Jack. Not after I told my parents yesterday that I’ve changed! ”

“But you’re not failing at your job just because you’re with me!” he snapped. “Penny, I understand that it’s going to be harder for you than for me…but you’re not alone, okay? I’m still here.”

“Yeah, and what’s in it for me?” she replied angrily.

Jack’s eyebrows shot up and he took a step back. “What’s in it for you?”

“Shit,” she whispered, rubbing her forehead feverishly.

Her eyes stung, but she ignored them. “I didn’t mean it like that.

But…I’m so close to finally doing something right.

I’m good at the job. Lyle is impressed with me.

Gareth is impressed with me. My parents…

well, at least they don’t think I’m a failure right now.

Not yet. I’m so sick of having to endure their indulgent looks.

And now I’ve made a huge mess again and I am ruining everything and… ”

“Nonsense,” Jack interrupted sharply, placing his big hands firmly around her face. “It’s my fault. I couldn’t leave you alone.”

“But I didn’t want you to leave me alone, either!” she whispered heatedly. “I knew I shouldn’t get involved with you, but I didn’t care. And that’s my fault. So now I have to do damage control.”

“By breaking up with me?” he asked coolly.

“No!” she snapped, annoyed. “Haven’t you been listening? I don’t want to break up. I just want a break. And then… I don’t know.”

“Well, I don’t know isn’t good enough, Penny,” he whispered, caressing her cheeks with his thumbs.

Her heart skipped a beat as a few tears caught in her eyelashes.

He was right, but she had no other choice.

She couldn’t disappoint everyone again. She couldn’t bear the fact that her family was talking about her behind her back again and everyone was essentially wondering if she was really part of the Clark family or if she was adopted.

“Jack, please,” she whispered. “Don’t make it so difficult for me. Let’s just take a break, wait until the worst is over, and then talk again.”

“So, when will the worst be over?”

“I don’t know. But it’s the simplest solution.”

“It’s no solution at all!”

“Jack!” she snapped, taking a sudden step back so that his hands fell from her face. “I have to act responsibly, okay? It was stupid to start something, we both know that. So…let’s focus on what’s most important.”

“Well, you are what’s most important,” he replied quietly. “But it wasn’t stupid to start something. It was the best idea I’ve ever had.”

She shook her head and wiped the tears from her cheeks.

“Stop saying things like that! This is difficult for me, okay? But it’s for the best. Not just for me, but for you too.

Or do you think they’ll just leave you alone?

No! They’ll dig into your past like they did mine.

And what all do you think they’ll uncover, Jack?

You have so many skeletons in our closet that you don’t want coming out… ”

“I don’t care,” he said.

“You say that now! But what will it look like in a month when your life is a shit show? When they’ve dragged your siblings into our mess and Anna can’t even walk the streets anymore?

You’ll lose the title of Saint that you worked so hard for.

People will find out about your father. And your brother.

About your terrible childhood. Everything will come out, when they find out about us. ”

Jack rubbed his eyes with his thumb and forefinger and took a deep breath before muttering, “Then they can’t find out. You’re right, okay? I have a lot of skeletons in my closet. So, what difference does it make if I keep you a secret, too?”

“Because it won’t work, Jack. We won’t stay a secret for long.”

“Oh, you have no idea how good I am at keeping secrets.” He laughed mirthlessly. “I’ve been in the NHL for ten years and nobody has a clue.”