Page 121 of Hope After Loss

“You look pretty sharp yourself. Who knew you’d look so good in a tux?”

“I did.”

She laughs.

“It’s good to hear you laugh. I’m sorry the ceremony made you sad,” I say.

She leans back and looks up at me. “Why do you think it made me sad?” she asks.

“I saw you. You were crying. I figured it was bringing up memories.”

She shakes her head. “I was crying for Taeli, Weston. Women do that at weddings. Especially when they see how happy their friend is. Every time I cry doesn’t mean I’m thinking about Mike. Yes, there will be days that I look into my daughter’s eyes and I see him, and for a moment, I’ll think about the life that we planned that never was. Grief will wash over me, and I’ll crash. Not because I wish he were here and you weren’t. That door is closed, and I know that, but for a fleeting moment, it’ll be like I’m looking in a window and seeing what should have been for her. It’s an echo of pain, but just an echo.”

And it hits me that I was never fighting a ghost.

From our first official date until now, everything has felt effortless. Our relationship blooming and growing more intense with every passing day.

The key has been communication. She’s never hesitated to let me know how she feels and the day she admitted that she loved me was the best day of my life because she and Kaela have become my everything.

I take her in my arms and look her in the eye. “I’m willing to share your heart with his memory. I’m willing to share Kaela with his memory. As long as I can call you guys mine, I have no problem with you being his too,” I assure her.

“I’m being buried beside Mike. We purchased adjoining plots and a combined headstone. I think you need to know that, going in,” she blurts out.

“Baby, I couldn’t care less where you take your final nap. I’ll buy the plot on the other side of you, and you can lie at rest between us. But your name will be hyphenated. I want everyone to know you are mine too.”

“Hyphenated?”

“Yep. How does Anna Kunder-Tuttle sound?”

“Is that a proposal?” she asks.

“Not yet, but soon.”

“And you’d be okay with me keeping Kunder?”

“Of course. It’s Kaela’s last name. I don’t want her growing up with a different last name than her momma.”

I lay my forehead against hers.

“Maybe one day, we can have hers hyphenated too,” she whispers.

I choke out a response before kissing her temple. “I’d be honored.”

Anna

I look up at this man who took all my broken pieces and patiently put me back together like a puzzle, piece by piece.

I could have stayed bitter. Bitter at losing the life I thought I was supposed to have. Or I can be thankful. Thankful for the time I had with Mike and thankful for the seed our love planted inside me. Thankful he gave me Kaela and for him showing me what unconditional love looked like so I could recognize it when I found it again.

“I never thought I could love again. I didn’t think it was possible. When Mike died, my heart shattered. But you came along and picked up every shard and carefully glued it back together. You helped me find my smile again. You helped me find my joy again. You helped me find myself again. And I think that if Mike could have hand-picked a man to love his girls through this life, he would have chosen you, Weston Tuttle. I choose you.”

I was forced to start over. I didn’t get a choice in that, but I did have a choice to move forward or stay stuck. My story wasn’t over. It was simply the end of a chapter. I just had to decide whether or not to close the book or keep going.

Thank God I decided to turn the page. Weston Tuttle was waiting for me there.

Weston

“A toast to you finding your forever, brother,” Langford says.