Page 12 of Honey Bee Library (Sweet Tea and a Southern Gentleman #7)

WILLOW

I woke up feeling just as confused as when I went to bed last night.

I thought a good night’s sleep would help me understand what had transpired between me and Cole. I naively thought I would wake up with the answers to the questions that had plagued my mind after our conversation last night.

I was wrong.

I sighed as I shifted my weight on the mattress. I was lying next to Jasper with my hands resting on my chest, staring up at the dark ceiling above me. No matter how many times I replayed my late-night interaction with Cole, I still couldn’t understand why I felt like this.

Sure, I’d started out defensive. How else was I supposed to act after Cole bought Jasper more toys than I could ever afford to? Santa would never compare to Cole’s gift-giving, and that was the last thing I needed—being inadequate in my son’s eyes.

All I’d wanted to do was set boundaries with Cole.

If he was going to continue to spend time around my son, then he needed to know where the lines were so he didn’t cross them.

If I was going to take the guardrails off our relationship and let Cole in, he needed to know that he was no longer playing with just my future, but my son’s as well.

Cole’s confession about his childhood threw me for a loop.

When I first met Cole, I thought he was a nepo-baby.

His clothes. His car. His rental home. They all screamed trust fund.

But after what he shared about his mother last night, I was beginning to realize that maybe I’d been wrong about this man.

And that thought made me feel guilty.

Part of me wanted to apologize. But then I would have to admit exactly what I’d thought about him. I would have to admit that I’d made snap judgments about a man I didn’t really know. Did I want to share that part of myself with him? Would he judge me because of it?

He had to know that my go-to mode was protective mom .

That I would do anything to make sure that my son grew up happy and healthy.

I had to be skeptical when a stranger suddenly waltzed into the diner I’d inherited and declared he owned half of it.

For the sake of my future and Jasper’s, I’d needed to question his intentions.

But now, things had changed. Cole seemed…human to me. My heart pounded when I thought about him. I thought about the way his expression changed when he talked about his mom. I could see the pain in his gaze when it met mine. It was a pain I was familiar with.

It was the pain only felt by someone who had been left behind.

I closed my eyes and slowly shook my head from side to side. I was going to treat Cole better. He’d done nothing to deserve the cold attitude I’d been giving him since he walked into the diner, and I was determined to start over.

And I was going to start right now.

I glanced over at Jasper to make sure he was sound asleep and slowly slid off the bed.

I padded over to the bathroom and quietly shut the door behind me.

There was name-brand shampoo and conditioner in the shower that hadn’t been there before.

I wondered if they had been picked up with Jasper’s toys and clothes.

I tried to not let it bother me as I slipped out of my pajamas and into the steaming hot shower.

The scent of the shampoo and conditioner transported me to a place of calm and relaxation like no other hair care had done in the past. My body felt renewed as I wrapped an oversized, fluffy towel around my body and stepped onto the plush bathmat just outside the shower door.

Forget Jasper not being satisfied by the gifts under the Christmas tree, I was never going to be happy with a normal, mundane shower again. Not after that experience.

There were all sorts of face creams set out on the vanity. I wasn’t sure what half of them did, so I settled on the basic lotion with sunscreen added. I did recognize the leave-in conditioner, so I sprayed some in my hair before I finger-combed it through so my hair would dry in soft waves.

I slipped out of the bathroom to rifle through the thrifted clothes in my duffel bag and then headed back into the bathroom to dress in the t-shirt and jeans I’d picked out.

Jasper was still asleep when I finished, so I headed out into the hallway, leaving the bedroom door open so I would hear him when he woke.

The house was dark as I made my way to the kitchen. I turned on the lights, and they filled the room with a soft, amber glow.

I was going to make Cole breakfast. He’d done so much to help us these last few days, and I was determined to make it up to him. One, because he deserved it. And two, because it would help assuage my guilt. After our conversation last night, I had a lot of guilt.

I was halfway through making the French toast when I heard a man clear his throat.

I startled and turned to see Cole leaning against the doorframe that separated the kitchen from the hallway.

He was shirtless, with his pajama pants slung low on his hips and his arms folded across his tattooed chest.

“What are you doing?” he asked, a half smile emerging that caused butterflies to take flight in my stomach.

My cheeks warmed under his gaze, so I quickly turned my attention back to the food before I let my thoughts get carried away. With the way my body was responding to his presence, I feared I might give him signals that I not only didn’t fully understand, but also feared.

Cole was my business partner, that was it.

The butterflies and my blushing cheeks needed to get a grip.

“Making breakfast,” I finally muttered when I remembered he had asked me a question.

From the corner of my eye, I saw him drop his arms as he walked toward me. My skin pricked from anticipation as he stood behind me. I could feel his body inches from mine as he peered over my shoulder.

“Making breakfast?” he repeated.

I wanted to pull back. His closeness scared me. It was too intimate. It was too revealing. I felt exposed. I picked up the bowl and shuffled to the side to fiddle with the griddle that had been warming up.

“Yes,” I said with as much confidence as I could muster. “Is that not allowed?” I glanced over my shoulder, ready to fight, but he didn’t look upset. His lips were tipped up in an amused smile.

“Definitely allowed. I just…” He pushed his hand through his hair, causing the muscles in his arm to ripple.

Of course, my gaze snapped right to his arm, his chest, and then his abs, and Cole noticed.

His gaze followed the path mine took, and when I finally made my way back to his face, his smile had turned wicked.

I inwardly cursed him as I turned away and focused my attention on the pile of bread in front of me.

That move had been intentional, and I’d walked right into it.

“If you want to get ready, breakfast should be done cooking when you get out.” I picked up the butter, unwrapped it, and coated the griddle with a thin layer.

I could feel Cole’s gaze on me, but I wasn’t going to fall for that again. My focus was on the French toast and only the French toast.

Finally, he nodded and headed out of the kitchen. My entire body came crashing back down to earth the moment he exited the room. My muscles had been spring boards and my nerves on edge the entire time he was near me. Like I’d been in fight-or-flight mode.

With him gone, I could finally focus.

Thankfully, dunking bread into the custard and then laying it on the griddle was simple. I let my mind quiet as I focused on cooking each side to golden perfection.

I was piling the last few pieces of bread onto a plate next to the griddle when Cole came in.

I tried to ignore the way his damp hair curled around his ears, or how the button-down shirt he was wearing fit him just right.

I tried to ignore how he smelled like cedar wood and amber when he walked past me on his way to start the coffee machine.

But I failed horribly.

I was so acutely aware of where he was that it was making me dizzy. If I didn’t get out of the kitchen, I was scared I would do something I was going to regret.

“I’m going to check on Jasper,” I said after I set the plate of French toast down on the kitchen table. I didn’t bother to see if he’d heard me. I just hurried from the room.

Jasper was lying in bed but awake. I pulled at the covers, and he attempted to grab them before they were gone, but I beat him to it. He grumbled and buried his face in his pillow.

“Breakfast is ready, bubba,” I said as I sat on the bed next to him and pushed his curls away from his face.

He murmured something incoherent into the pillow, but I didn’t have to hear it to know what he was complaining about. He didn’t want to get up.

I patted his back. “It’s time to start the day,” I said.

I made my way over to his duffle bag and rifled through it. Nothing looked good. The memory of last night floated into my mind. Cole had purchased clothes for Jasper, and I was certain they were better than the worn t-shirts and jeans I’d been able to get him at a moment’s notice.

I didn’t want the kids at Jasper’s school to make fun of him. I’d feel like a horrible mom if that happened when I had the opportunity to prevent it. So I slipped out into the hallway and padded over to the room that Cole had filled with clothes and toys.

I felt nauseous as I sorted through the name-brand clothes that Cole had picked out.

Some of them still had price tags on them, and when I read the number, my stomached lurched again.

I really hoped that Cole didn’t expect me to pay him back.

At thirty dollars a pop, these shirts, which I was sure Jasper was going to ruin the moment he got them on, would bankrupt me.

My hope was that Cole was as nice as he seemed. That he saw a struggling single mom and wanted to help. The last thing I needed was to owe him anything. He was already so involved in my life, and I feared what would happen if our relationship soured.