Page 36 of Hexed, Vexed, & Undersexed

“Isthatwhat you won? Sign me up for the next gameshow!”

“Wha—” I cut off, realizing that she’s staring at a very naked Kai.

“No, Gram-Gram, this is Kai. The weirdest thing happe—”

“Tittie’s son?!” Gram shrieks.

“Tituba!” I correct sternly, before pausing. “Wait, he’s Tituba’s son?”

“Well, that was Tittie’s son’s name. Maybe he’s just a descendent. Can we borrow your grimoire?” she asks shamelessly.

“Gram! Please, focus. This is important. Kai was my familiar, Binx. You remember me mentioning him?”

“The cat that the network got you is this. . . fine specimen?”

“How about instead of focusing on his looks you focus on the part where I told you that he was once a cat!”

“Who turned him human?”

“Not me,” Kai answers, and I suddenly place his accent.

“Oh my goddess, you are Tituba’s son!” I bellow, my mind finally placing the colonial speech.

“Indeed, I am. My mama changed me into a cat to save me from execution.”

“You’ve been a cat for over three hundred years?!” I screech.

“Three hundred and twenty-eight years to be exact,” he corrects.

“You must be horny,” Gram observes, earning a low groan from me.

Honestly, could this get any worse?

Just then, I hear a knock at the front door.

“I’ll get it!” my mother calls from somewhere in the house.

I hear mumbling and ignore it until my mom calls, “Evanora, dear, a Preston is here to see you!”

Fuck.

It got worse.

Before I can head off my mom, she’s invited Preston in.

“What are you doing here?” I squeak in surprise.

“Evanora! Manners!” my mom scolds.

“Yeah, Evanora!” my gram-gram adds, following behind me.

Preston is shuffling his feet from side to side and looks uncomfortable.

“I knew something was wrong and when I went back to talk with you, you were gone. So, I, ah, looked up your address and decided to visit. Unannounced. Sorry.”

“Where’d you get my address?”

Preston winces.