Page 40 of Her Rogue of a Duke
“We should return,” he whispered. “As delightful as staying here with you in my arms sounds, lingering here is unfortunately not a wise option.”
She nodded in agreement, her expression contemplative. After a pause, she ventured, “May I ask a favor of you?”
Joshua arched a brow at her. “Certainly. What do you need?”
“Would you… could you perhaps visit my residence and retrieve a few belongings for me?”
A little surprised by the request, Joshua asked, “What sort of belongings?”
“My diary,” she exhaled, “along with some clothing. Everything is already packed, I just haven't had the opportunity to collect them. There are just a few bags sitting in the entrance hall. You won’t miss them.”
A simple enough request, but he wondered why she did not go over there herself. Was she afraid to be seen returning home?
Or, perhaps, was there someone she did not wish to run into?
He wanted to ask her, but then thought better of it. She was trusting him with this favor, and he did not want to give her cause to regret it.
“Consider your command… fulfilled.” He nipped at her nose cheekily.
She blushed a pretty pink and gave him a relieved smile. “Truly? Oh, thank you, Joshua! You have no idea how much this means to me.”
Again, Joshua felt an urge to inquire why it meant so much to her. Why she could not return to her home herself… yet he chose to remain silent. He simply nodded and pressed another kiss to her forehead.
“I won’t be long,” he said, lowering his feet from the lounge and picking up his trousers and shirt. “Will you wait here for me?”
Francesca responded with a demure smile and nodded. “If you don’t mind. Dawn is breaking and it is rather peaceful out here. I would much rather spend a little longer enjoying the cool breeze.”
Joshua returned her smile with a modest one of his own. “Very well. Stay here and I shall hasten back to you posthaste.”
“Settled,” she replied softly, tucking a stray lock of hair behind her ear, shyly averting her gaze as Joshua began to redress.
Now partly clothed, Joshua rose and gathered the rest of his garments. Pulling on his coat, he made for the door but paused for a moment to look back at her. She reclined on the lounge in a state of natural grace, her nude body radiating a seductive aura as the morning light cast her pale skin in a cool glow. She gave him a serene smile, nearly tempting him back in.
It took more willpower than he realized he had within him to turn and walk out the door and leave her behind. He was determined to get her belongings and return to her as quickly as possible.
The thought of being apart from her for too long was something he was finding increasingly difficult to bear.
Upon Joshua's departure, as the door clicked shut, Francesca rose and reached for her dressing gown. She slipped it on,cinching it snugly around her waist. She knew she should return to the manor and get dressed before anyone caught her in such a state, but she hesitated. She did not want to leave the Orangery as she had promised Joshua she would remain here waiting for him.
Francesca reasoned she had time, though. She could go back to the manor, get dressed, and return to the garden house, all before Joshua’s return from Oakvale.
Yes, that was a reasonable idea. If she was careful, she could slip into the manor unnoticed so as not to cause gossip among the staff too.
With her decision made, Francesca swiftly exited the garden house, her steps light as she navigated through the verdant garden to the manor. Fortune seemed to favor her and she managed to encounter no one on her way to her chamber. Once there, she hastily chose a tame, modest gown and dressed herself, not bothering to summon Abigail, her maid.
Upon dressing herself in a noticeably less scandalous attire, she hurried back out of her chamber. She was eager to return to the garden house and not risk missing Joshua.
As Francesca made her way back down the manor and through the garden, her mind replayed the previous night's events. She could not help but smile at the memory. A part of her could not believe that she had actually allowed him to do those things to her, but she did not regret a moment of their time together.When she had told him that she wanted him to be the one to give her that experience, she had been telling the sincere truth.
More and more, Francesca was coming to the unsettling realization that she might have no choice but to marry Lord Terrell. Despite his betrayal and his clear lack of remorse, he seemed to be her only viable option. The thought of surrendering her innocence to such a man had been too agonizing to consider. Yet, oddly, when she considered the same with Joshua, she had been filled with a burning desire that had seemed to engulf her senses.
Francesca had always thought she would feel differently after laying with a man. That somehow, she would sense some physical change within her. In truth, she felt very much the same as she had the day before. The only real difference between who she had been before giving herself to Joshua and who she was now was that she now possessed a knowledge of what it was to be intimate with another person.
Did that knowledge make her a different person? No, she did not think so. However, she was beginning to wonder why she had held on to the belief that her innocence was so important. She had regarded it as a sacred treasure to be preserved, yet now she realized that if she had waited until marriage, possibly to a man she desired far less than Joshua, her first experience might have been underwhelming, if not disappointing.
In retrospect, she considered herself fortunate. Joshua had been gentle and tender with her, but he had also been confident and assured of himself. The pleasure he had given her hadbeen incredible. Yes, there had been discomfort, but she had anticipated as much. What she hadnotanticipated was the feeling of profound connection she felt with him. As if they were two halves of a single entity that had finally come together.
Would she ever be able to feel that way with another person? Or, would it only ever be Joshua? The thought frightened her. Now that she had experienced that, she was not certain she could be content with anything less.