Page 31

Lori

‘It’s like an arranged marriage, but without the marriage?’

I’d known this odd discussion over dinner with every woman in Seb’s family wouldn’t be fun, but I was squirming in my seat before we’d even explained ourselves in a way that made sense.

I wasn’t sure what was worse: Albertine’s persistent misunderstanding or the daggers R?sine was shooting with her gaze.

More concerning was Seb’s sister, who was still looking at me as though I were joining the family.

His little niece with her messy plaits piped up with something in French, to which R?sine replied firmly. Denise stifled a smile.

‘Alice doesn’t speak English, but she understands more than we think,’ she said with a chuckle. ‘She just asked if Uncle Seb was getting married.’

It was my turn to choke on a roast potato.

The way we were sitting around the big scarred table in the kitchen didn’t help either.

I was certain my chair was drifting closer to Seb’s as we faced the austere features of his mum and grandma, with Denise obviously enjoying herself on one end and her daughter gleefully arranging our marriage on the other.

‘It’s not anything like a marriage, Mamie,’ Seb said through gritted teeth. His elbow brushed my forearm and then stayed there as though for solidarity – or the same pleasant tactile sensations my skin experienced at the touch.

‘Nothing good ever came of marriage in this family,’ Albertine added emphatically. ‘So you’re having a fling privately and also having another fling publicly.’

I’d never seen Seb’s complexion quite that shade of scarlet.

He glanced at me, the pressure of his arm growing, and all I could think about was the private fling.

We hadn’t discussed that angle of the fake relationship.

I held my breath as I met his stormy gaze, suspecting he was thinking about the same thing, but with reservations I wasn’t sure I wanted to hear.

‘It’s less complicated than some of my relationships,’ Denise pointed out, shooting us an amused, sympathetic smile.

‘How long are you staying?’ R?sine asked, cutting straight to the practical stuff I wasn’t ready to deal with.

‘Maman, Lori’s a guest—’

‘It’s a fair question,’ I said, cutting him off.

Another stormy look. He dropped his arm, but then snaked it along the back of my chair and all my hair stood on end. ‘But first we’re friends – right? You’re welcome to stay.’

Albertine humphed. ‘Friends who—’

‘I’ll clean up!’ R?sine interrupted her.

Seb mumbled something about helping her before rising from his chair.

His palm touched down between my shoulder blades and the breath left my lungs as though the light caress had been a blow.

The stroke of his fingers along the back of my neck as he removed his hand was enough to set my skin on fire, my body growing heavy.

But if Seb noticed, he didn’t react, following R?sine out to help and leaving me alone with my out-of-control libido. When I recovered my breath, I noticed Albertine and Denise eyeing me.

‘I don’t— I didn’t mean to cause any trouble,’ I blurted out.

Albertine just blinked at me, but Denise juggled her sleepy son on her lap until she could snake her free hand across the table to squeeze my arm. ‘It’s okay.’

‘What trouble?’ Albertine said indignantly. ‘You’re the best thing that’s happened to him in years. You have to feel something in life.’

I froze, needing to contradict her for my peace of mind, but unwilling to. ‘But we just explained it’s not a real relationship.’

She shrugged. ‘The feelings are real.’

My churning stomach proved her point – for attraction, at least. ‘It doesn’t mean we’ll ride off into the sunset one day. I’m— We’re—’

‘Do you think I don’t understand that? A bit of heartbreak might do him good.’

Goosebumps skittered along my skin. I didn’t want to be the one to break his heart and I certainly didn’t want his grandma inviting me to. Plus, I didn’t even know if he wanted to sleep together again.

Denise said something to Albertine in muted French, which made the older woman humph again and stand to clear the remaining plates.

A moment later, I was alone with Seb’s sister and her children and Denise’s quiet contemplation of my expression scared me almost as much as Albertine’s predictions of heartbreak.

‘Don’t worry. I’m not going to give you advice or judgement,’ she began. ‘But the way he looks at you…’

The way he touches me…

Seb’s voice cut through the restless moment. ‘I think Lori’s had enough guilt-tripping tonight.’

I turned to find him in the doorway, his arms crossed, leaning on the frame and giving his sister a dark, warning look. I’d preferred it when he was defending me to his prickly mother, but that easy posture, his lanky form set off all my endorphins again.

Denise sighed and rose gingerly to her feet, propping up her sleeping son. ‘I can take a hint.’

‘Don’t leave on my—’ I tried.

‘I’m more than happy to take the kids home and leave you two to… work things out,’ she said with a twitch of a smile that Seb either ignored or didn’t see.

He sighed. ‘Take your progeniture home before they fall asleep. Let me put this one in the car for you.’

She handed over a floppy Mael, who settled onto his shoulder contentedly, pacifier working in his mouth.

‘Oh, tu pars?’ R?sine said a quick goodbye to Denise, pressing kisses to her cheeks, Albertine repeating the gesture a moment later, and then I followed her onto the porch to see Seb dropping a soft kiss onto his nephew’s head before easing him into a car seat.

‘The two men in our family,’ Denise said with a soft sigh. ‘He never forgave me for having kids that he couldn’t help but love.’

That strange statement made a lot more sense to me after our conversations today, but it didn’t help me untangle what I wanted.

With another squeeze of my arm, Denise pressed a kiss to my cheek, pausing to whisper, ‘If anyone can knock some sense into him, it’s you.

’ Without waiting for my reaction, she headed for her car, trailed by the sleepy Alice, who turned back to stare at me as though she were seeing rings and bouquets.

Seb dawdled back from the car, waving with one hand as he kept his other in his pocket.

He was wearing his socks and Birkenstocks again, like the dorky European he was, but my eyes enjoyed a long, slow study of his form, from the hint of muscle under his jeans to the hard, lean lines of his torso.

I made a show of yawning and stretching as well as I could with my stiff shoulder.

I was relieved his family kept country hours. If we’d been staying with my Italian relatives, we’d never have got to bed before mid-morning the next day and I was hoping we could… clear a few things up tonight.

Rushing my shower because I could barely stand the sensitive state of my skin, I dumped my clothes in Seb’s room and then hesitated, the door still open. Could I stay in this bed and not make a move on him, if that’s what he wanted?

The light in the little sitting room was on and muted voices reached my ears. I couldn’t just pounce on Seb in his bedroom when he emerged semi-naked after his shower.

I grabbed a glass of water from the kitchen and lingered awkwardly in the corridor in indecision, hoping neither his mum nor grandma would appear, because I couldn’t come up with a reason why I wasn’t sure if I should go into his room.

When he did appear, he was in a comfy pair of tracksuit bottoms and a soft T-shirt and he stopped up short when he saw me.

Perhaps my thoughts were visible, because he peered at me quizzically as he approached, taking my chin between his thumb and fingers.

For a considerate fake boyfriend, sometimes he touched me in the most divinely assertive way.

‘I’m, uh… tired,’ was all I managed to say.

His gaze clouded. ‘Are you actually tired, or just sick of my family?’

‘Bonne nuit, mon chou !’ I heard from behind us, in a decidedly put-out tone.

Seb bit his lip over a wince and then called out good night to his grandma. When she was gone, he prompted me with a look.

‘Er, it’s time to lie down kind of tired.’

His small smile was more sympathetic and less sexy and I was obviously failing at this. ‘So, guest room and sleep? My room and sleep? My room and film first?’ he asked lightly.

After all the little touches, the confusing emotions of the day, it shouldn’t have surprised me that I blew a fuse. Stretching up to whisper into his ear, I said, ‘Your room and I suck your cock?’

I wished I could have caught and bottled the whimper that emerged from his throat.

His breath was hot on my cheek. ‘You— We haven’t discussed the…

boundaries of the arrangement,’ he said in a low voice.

I was worried for a moment he’d resist, but his hand fisted in the front of the sweatshirt I was wearing – another of his soft ones that I was considering stealing.

‘Bonne nuit, tous les deux.’

He snatched his hand away as R?sine flapped her farming magazine at us and shuffled towards the hall. ‘Bonne nuit,’ he called back casually, but his eyes didn’t leave mine. Waiting until after his mother had disappeared down the hall, he softly rasped, ‘Do you mean a fake fuck?’

Watching his lips form those words made my vision blur and my mouth water, hot, syrupy need flooding my body. ‘Well, I could give you a fake blow job or a real one,’ I murmured in reply. ‘Up to you.’

His exhale was so laboured it was almost a whistle. ‘You don’t have to do anything.’

I licked my lips and enjoyed the sight of his throat bobbing – probably as he swallowed his tongue.

‘If you want to keep boundaries, I could just tell you, instead, how I’d put my mouth on your dick.

I remember how thick and hard you got last time and I want to see how deep I can take you.

I’d be on my knees, pulling down your pants, and then I’d take the head in my—’

With a strangled grunt, he grabbed both of my hands and dragged me down the hall to his room, slamming the door harder than he’d intended, if his grimace was anything to go by. Caging me in against the jamb, he took a deep, unsteady breath.

‘Fake relationship, real sex, okay?’ He seemed to struggle even to say those few words.

‘Okay.’