Page 87 of Hard Rock Muse

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“I’m not taking no for an answer,” Seth told me over the phone. “You’re coming clubbing with us, and that's final.”

“So I don’t get a choice in the matter?” I asked.

“Nope!” he replied cheerfully. “Everyone else is coming. It wouldn’t be the same without you. Gael is bringing Jessie and Nathan is bringing Becca. So you’ve got to come, too.”

“All right,” I conceded. “I’ll come along with Julian.”

It wasn’t like I didn’t enjoy clubbing. I just liked hearing Seth try so hard to convince me. It warmed my heart. The three of us had always been a tight-knit group. I thought I’d lost that for good. But now I was apparently a part of “everyone.”

It helped heal that small part inside me that still felt cast aside and abandoned.

“Don’t forget to wear something hot,” Seth said.

“What?” I laughed. “Why?”

“It’ll be fun watching Julian drool over you all night and not be able to touch you ‘cause you’re in public and he doesn’t do that PDA shit.” I could hear the grin in Seth’s voice.

I mentally sorted through all my clothes. Those pencil skirts and blouses weren’t going to cut it for club-wear, but I’d gotten rid of most of my old rocker clothes in a fit of angst.

I searched my closet for something, wondering if I’d have to go out and buy a new outfit. And then there, in the back, hung something I hadn’t seen in years. I wondered if I’d still fit into it.

A short, form-fitting black dress with artfully placed rips and silver buckles, and one long zipper going from neck to hem.

Easy access, Julian had called it once.

I remembered the first time I’d ever worn it in front of Julian. It hadn’t stayed on me more than five minutes.

Perfect.

I took the dress off the hanger and laid it out on my bed. I’d probably wear those knee-high boots along with it. I went to the bathroom and rummaged around for some of my older makeup kits, the ones with dark eyeshadow to do a dramatic smokey eye.

I paused.

There, hidden away under the sink among piles of junk, was a box of hair color.

Hot pink.

I pulled out the box and examined it, contemplating.

I’d tried to reinvent myself. Tried to throw away all parts of the old Ever Darling. I hadn’t liked the person she — or rather,I —had become.

But there had been nothing wrong with Ever. There had never been anything wrong withme. Julian had helped me see that.

Decision made, I opened the box and took out the instructions, reading the familiar wording.

A few hours later, I was standing outside the club, in a long line, wearing my tight black dress and lace-up boots, and sporting a brand new hot pink hair color, with a contented smile on my lips.

I’d never felt more like myself.

As I waited, I took in all the other people waiting with me. Some were dressed similar to me, like they could walk out onto a rock stage at any minute. Others were more subdued, with dark denim and brand-name t-shirts.

There was a commotion up and down the line as people gasped and pointed across the street.

Cerise and Liam were strolling up to the club. Her usual red hair cascaded down her back in waves and she wore a leather pleated skirt.

I used to feel jealous whenever I saw her. Now I just felt a kind of kinship.