Page 53 of Great Uncle Henry (Pride & Prejudice Vagary)
A day after the note from her sister was received, Hattie Phillips was visiting her husband’s office. He had requested that she come speak to him on some subject or another.
On entering the office, Hattie noticed that the door to her husband’s private office was almost closed, only open a crack. As Frank had asked her to come, she did not think it would be wrong to enter his office. To that end she walked towards the door, fully intending to open it and go in.
“Pardon me, Mrs Phillips. Your husband apologises for the delay, but he has an urgent meeting at this moment,” the head clerk stated with a bow. “He would appreciate it greatly if you would sit in this comfortable chair and wait for him.”
Hattie was about to object until she noted the chair was close to her husband’s door.
It had been far too long since she had gleaned gossip from the office, so perhaps this would be her chance.
“If my husband asked it of me, I will wait for him,” she allowed.
She sat down on the chair and leaned forward towards the door.
It was perfect; she could clearly hear what the men inside were discussing.
“This is grave indeed,” her husband said. “Can this William Collins be so very bad?”
“Indeed, he is,” the man who was unknown to Hattie responded.
Hattie could not know that the man in question was Richard Fitzwilliam.
“Not only did he attempt to conduct his own marriage ceremony to an unwilling heiress, but he was aware that his appointment to the living in the Hunsford Parish was made by one who had not the authority to make it.”
“The man sounds extremely dishonourable. Why are you telling me all of this?” Her husband asked.
“It has come to my notice that this Collins has spun a yarn to Mr Thomas Bennet, the master of Longbourn. It seems that as intelligent as Mr Bennet is purported to be, he has welcomed this man into his house.” The unknown man reported.
“Now I hear that Collins is claiming to be the heir to Longbourn and that your brother-in-law has not refuted his claims, even though he is aware that the defrocked clergyman is not in the line of succession. What would Mr Bennet hope to gain by accepting these lies and not challenging them?”
“Wait. Did you say this Mr Collins has been defrocked?” Her husband verified.
“Indeed, he has, by his Grace, the Archbishop of Canterbury himself. The infractions were so serious that I hear Mr Collins came close to excommunication,” the man revealed. “It is said that this despicable man is searching for a bride among his cousins and that Mr Bennet is amenable to that.”
“Bennet came to see me to draw up a settlement between his second daughter and a Collins. I refused to do so until I was sure my niece had accepted a proposal of marriage from the man,” her husband shared.
But he was not done. “As to Bennet’s motivations, I can only speculate that it is his warped sense of amusement which drives him.
Now I understand why he wanted me to create a document naming William Collins as the heir presumptive of Longbourn.
Of course, I refused as I have no intention of contravening my professional ethics and committing fraud for any price. ”
Hattie had to put her hand over her mouth to stifle the gasp fighting for release. Such a man in her sister’s house. This was why Fanny and the girls had escaped to some unnamed inn in Hertford!
“I can only pray Bennet is not aware that his wife and three eldest daughters will attend the Autumn Assembly. He never attends, but if he is informed they will be there, I could imagine him going as far as to urge his cousin to compromise Lizzy. He knows full well Lizzy will never accept a buffoon like the one you have described, so that would be the only way he could attempt to assert his will on her,” her husband related. “Very sad…”
She was horrified that she had been the one to tell that terrible man, Thomas Bennet, that Fanny and the three eldest girls would be at the assembly.
Hattie stood and almost ran out of the offices, not back to the house, but out into Meryton.
She needed to make sure the characters of this disgraced former clergyman and her brother-in-law were known far and wide in the neighbourhood.
She did not stop walking until she reached Lucas Lodge.
~~~~~~~/~~~~~~~
“Why did you two not travel with Darce since he will arrive on the morrow?” Bingley asked the next morning as he, Fitzwilliam, and de Bourgh sat at the table in the dining parlour to break their fasts.
“We had some business to complete. Hence, we arrived here without William,” Richard explained.
“Were you able to complete what you needed to do?” Bingley enquired.
“Almost. It will soon be done to our satisfaction,” Richard stated. “Where are the Hursts and Miss Bingley?”
“Hurst and Louisa take trays in their sitting room in the morning, and Caroline operates on Town hours,” Bingley responded. He tried to ignore the fact that both other men were shaking their heads in disapproval.
“Your sister does know we are in the country, does she not?” Richard asked pointedly.
“Please tell me our meals will not be delayed in order to accommodate her whims. I hope she knows that my cousin intensely dislikes keeping Town hours in the country. If your sister is looking to impress William, that is not the way to achieve her aim.”
Caroline Bingley had just glided down the stairs in all of her glory, dressed, as she believed, to impress.
She was about to burst into the dining parlour and vent her spleen at Mr Fitzwilliam for daring to question her arrangements when she heard the rest of his statement.
The last thing she needed was to upset Mr Darcy.
She sailed into the dining parlour with a very fake smile plastered on her face.
“Charles, I have decided that as we are in the country,” she sniffed with disdain, “we will keep country hours.”
Thankfully, the harpy was looking at her brother and did not see Messrs Fitzwilliam and de Bourgh fighting to keep their mirth from exploding into loud guffaws.
“A very wise choice, Miss Bingley,” Richard managed with a straight face.
“Of course, it is,” Miss Bingley preened. “As an accomplished hostess, I am excessively attentive to all those things which pertain to the comfort of my guests,” Miss Bingley drawled, her nose high in the air.
Bingley held his peace. Was this the same sister who had vehemently claimed she would never allow country hours in a house where she was mistress?
Richard and de Bourgh placed their serviettes on the table next to their plates and stood. “Fitzwilliam and I are going for a ride,” de Bourgh stated. The two men bowed and were gone before either Bingley could react.
“Charles, why did you not stop them? I need to learn about Mr de Bourgh,” Miss Bingley screeched.
How her brother was supposed to know that never entered her mind.
~~~~~~~/~~~~~~~
For the most part, Bennet had avoided his cousin, but this morning, on the day before the assembly, as much as his stomach rebelled, he joined his cousin in the dining parlour to break his fast.
“It is good you chose to join me, Cousin,” Collins said as he sprayed semi-masticated food on the table around him. “Is there news from your wife and daughters? When will I meet my intended?”
Bennet felt the bile rise the more food his cousin spat on the table while speaking with his mouth full.
This had to be answered, so he swallowed down hard.
“I have received a missive from my wife. She and my daughters will arrive just in time for the assembly to be held in Meryton on the morrow. There will not be time for them to come home first, so we will meet them there, and I will introduce you to Elizabeth.”
Collins ceased using his hands to stuff food into his mouth and clapped with glee. “At last. She will be most honoured to receive my attentions,” he claimed.
“To that, Elizabeth may be overwhelmed by the privilege of your suit and seem to retreat.”
“What woman would not be overjoyed by the honour of my singling them out as the companion of my future life? Me, an honoured clergyman and one day, when you have gone to your final reward, the master of this estate?” Collins stated with a puffed-up chest.
It was a fight for Bennet to maintain his equanimity.
He kept reminding himself that Lizzy deserved this fate for daring to support her mother against him.
That she and Fanny had been in the right was beside the point.
“There are times when it is usual with young ladies to reject the addresses of the man whom they secretly mean to accept. They may even make it seem like they want nothing to do with him. Would you like to waste your valuable time if she issues a refusal, having to repeat your addresses a second or even a third time? Rather than having her lead you on a merry dance, would you not like a way to make her acceptance assured? ”
Even though the corpulent man did not ever think about anything, he seemed at that moment deep in contemplation.
“I agree, it would not do to trifle with my time. What do you suggest?”
“The assembly is a very public place; simply compromise her. That way you will save yourself from having to wait for her to play the silly game.”
“As her father, you are giving me permission to do so?” Collins verified.
“Indeed, I am,” Bennet confirmed. He may have failed to gain a document to discompose Fanny, but in this, he would not fail. Lizzy would learn there was a very high price to her crossing him.
All Hill could do was shake his head. He could not believe that a father would plot against his daughter in this fashion.
He retired to the small office he and his wife shared and dashed off an epistle.
When it was sanded and dried, he handed it to a trusted groom to have him deliver it to the dower house at Netherfield Park.
~~~~~~~/~~~~~~~