Page 174 of Gladiators of the Vagabond Boxset

Fierce

The sound of footsteps and the clack of Snarl’s nails on the metal floors preceded them, Hina’s vaguely floral scent filling the air.

I didn’t move from my sprawl on the hard bunk inside the brig, the bed I usually slept in when I managed a few hours.

Like a wounded animal, I wanted to growl, to lash out, but because it was Hina, I held my tongue.

“What are you doing here?” she asked, hovering just outside the small cell.

I opened one eye to look at her, noting that she’d curled her arms around her torso as if she were cold.

She looked uncertain, worried. Feeling guilty, I sat up and carefully placed Fellow on the thin, flat pillow so he could keep sleeping.

“Are you all right, Hina?” I asked her, happy that at least I could ask her things now.

My eyes darted to Snarl, who was sitting attentively at her side.

The Ferai beast said nothing, but he shared a rapid slideshow of images: her talking with Ziame and Abby, a shot of my quarters that I never used, and Thorin and Camila as they talked with Hina.

It said enough; she now probably knew all about my involvement with Meian’s death and that I never slept in my quarters.

My brothers were all gossips—including Jakar—I’d heard what he’d said to her myself.

When I got to my feet, Hina didn’t back away.

She tilted her delicate little chin up to look me in the eye.

I approached slowly, my eyes focused intently on every nuance I could read in her expression.

Was she scared of me? Worried? What was she thinking?

Fluffy interrupted the intense moment when she leaped up into my arms. Purring, she curled herself into all kinds of shapes in her excitement, rubbing her sleek fur against my bare chest. “Yeah, girl, I missed you too,” I told her, but I flicked my eyes up to Hina to make sure she knew I was talking about her too.

She dropped her arms from around her body and, with an apprehensive look, squared her shoulders and stepped into the cell.

With a dubious tone to her voice, she asked if we couldn’t get locked in.

“No, it’s safe—it won’t lock us inside.” Assured, she stepped closer, and when I offered a hand, she curled her fingers around it; they were cold and a little clammy.

“Are you sure you’re all right?” I asked again, not that she’d answered me the first time.

She didn’t look all right. Had something happened?

I didn’t think so, because Snarl would have immediately warned me.

Maybe she really didn’t like being in the brig with me.

I knew it was a stupid place to hang out, but I’d gotten so used to being in a small space, surrounded by bars, that it was the only place I felt like I knew which way was up aboard this ship.

She sat down on the bunk I’d just vacated and gently petted Fellow along his thick, fluffy back.

He made a happy chirping sound and rolled over to expose his belly.

She petted the softer, white fur there to the sound of more chirps, until Fluffy leaped out of my arms to investigate.

She was longer but slimmer, and her brightly colored fur was a sharp contrast to Fellow’s white and black.

Fellow opened his eyes, chirped some more, and soon the two were eagerly sniffing at each other.

I kept a watchful eye to make sure that Fluffy didn’t feel threatened or start thinking Fellow might make good eating—she was a predator, after all.

Likewise, I kept an eye on Fellow to make sure he wouldn’t swat at Fluffy; he was bulkier and had sharp claws.

Even if he meant well, a good swat of those claws could seriously hurt the small Riho.

There was no need to worry. They just sniffed at each other and then settled down together for a nap. Fellow needed all the rest and food he could get to recover, and Fluffy was a sleepyhead, usually napping the day away. This outcome was hardly surprising.

Once the two had settled, Hina’s eyes lifted from the cute duo to look at me.

She licked her lips before searching our surroundings.

“I don’t like cells. I was thrown in one when they arrested me back on Earth.

I spent two terrified days in one. Then they had me attend a sham of a trial and brought me to an even tinier cell for execution. ”

I winced and looked around the small cell again.

“Okay, let’s get out of here then. You don’t have to be here just because it relaxes me.

” Her eyebrows shot up as she stared at me with an incredulous look, her mouth shaping the words relaxes me?

She clearly couldn’t wrap her head around that, and I felt my chest burn with bright colors, displaying my embarrassment.

I swear, she was the only one around whom I lost all control of my camouflaging ability.

She got to her feet and took hold of both of my hands, stopping me from walking out of the cell.

“No, wait, now you know why I don’t like it here.

You need to tell me why you do.” I froze in place, forcing my colors to fade back into their relaxed state, the blue that reminded me of the Mother’s many lakes.

I knew Thorin was aware of my penchant for hanging out in the brig, the place that most closely resembled the cells in the slave stables I’d grown up in.

Without my brothers sleeping in the cells next to me, I felt lonely.

It helped that Snarl and Fluffy were with me.

The thought of being in my own quarters, with a door that properly closed—alone—filled me with unease.

Down on the planet, I’d slept with Hina tucked into my arms, and that had made everything better.

I wanted that again, but Abby had given her her own quarters, and Hina deserved a moment to figure things out on her own.

I’d seen how she responded when the Doc asked about my mating drive. It had spooked her.

Struggling to put things into words so that she could understand, I tried to describe how much I missed the sounds of others surrounding me at night.

How I felt like I didn’t fit in, that I had no role or place aboard the Vagabond like the others had.

Kitan was our pilot, Da’vi our engineer, and Ziame ran this ship as a real captain should, while Sunder and Thorin just seemed to know how to fit in, gather information, and perform tasks on the ship.

Thorin and Camila were both comfortable with the laser guns or rifles.

They’d tried to train the rest of us, but I hated the feel of the advanced weapons in my hands.

Sunder was like the village elder, always coming with sage advice.

And Luka was the Doc, of course, he knew exactly what his place was on this ship.

What did I have to offer? I just brought home strays that we had to find food for and hid them so they wouldn’t take them from me.

I couldn’t even read, so unlike Jakar, I hadn’t been able to try and learn new skills.

Unloading all of this on Hina made her sad.

She was rubbing at her eyes to try and hide her tears.

I didn’t want to make her cry, the last thing I wanted was for her to feel sorry for me in some way.

“Fierce!” she interrupted me. She had a hand on my shoulder now, leaning in so she was almost on top of me.

“You are not useless. It’s not your fault you can’t read.

But we can fix that—you can always learn if you want to. ”

I looked into her earnest eyes and felt like I didn’t deserve a female this smart and kind.

“I can learn, I know that. But even then—I don’t know what I can offer my brothers.

I’m a tracker, and I know how to care for animals…

” I gestured at Fellow and Fluffy, curled up together on the pillow.

“And I can’t even offer you a normal male for a mate, because I’m so messed up in the head, my safe spot is a damn prison cell! ”

She stared at me while shaking her head. “You have a right to that. To feel that way. After all you’ve been through? It’s a wonder you’re as kind and caring a man as you are. I’m in awe of that!” Her words were a soothing balm, an acknowledgment that maybe I wasn’t as messed up as I thought I was.

“You jumped down a freaking hole to rescue me when I ran like a dumbass. You kept me safe, you cared for me, you…” She faltered for a moment, seeming to gather her thoughts.

Her breaths came rapidly, stirred by the emotions she was struggling with.

I wanted to deny what I’d done for her down on the planet.

I leaped after her because she was my mate, wasn’t that motivation inherently selfish?

When I opened my mouth to speak, she raised a finger and pressed it against my lips, effectively shutting me up.

Slinging her leg over mine so she was straddling my lap, my thoughts wildly swung from feeling like a loser for hiding out in a prison cell to feeling like I was on top of the world, I had my mate in my arms, right where I wanted her. Needed her.

With her hands on my shoulders, she made sure she had eye contact when she spoke next.

“My world ended when I was executed on Earth. As far as I’m concerned, this is my second chance to do things better, to live life instead of letting it pass me by while I hide in my research.

” Her hands curled to slide up my neck beneath my hair, which eagerly clung to her skin.

“It’s the same for you. When you freed yourself, you gained a second chance at life.

Don’t spend it hiding and regretting. Let’s try to figure it out together, where we fit in now, what we can do to make a place for ourselves.

” I wanted to grab onto that offer with both hands.

I wanted it so badly that I could only give her a nod, words drying up in my throat like dust.