Page 24 of Gifted Destiny (Hidden Libraries #3)

Bren

S omething in the atmosphere, or the cosmos, or the library shifts when the third bond is complete. I’m uncertain if I’m the only one who senses it, but the possible futures lose the pervasive edge of doom I’ve grown accustomed to. My chest clenches when a fleeting image of an older Garrett with a child on his lap flutters through my mind. He’s happy and the little girl has Zosia’s golden eyes, but I can’t discern whether the vision is true sight or wishful thinking.

Avery’s sigh of relief echoes mine. We’ve found duties to occupy us, but it’s mostly busywork intended to take our minds off what might be happening in our apartments. I feared the worst, even though this was the most likely outcome. I hope Zosia made him beg for forgiveness before she allowed him into her bed.

“It’s done,” the vampire mutters. The terse words convey relief and lingering, justifiable anger. Garrett was out of line.

Kodi hovers nearby. Whenever he thinks no one is watching him, he grins with satisfied giddiness. The second chance with the woman he loved has given him a rosier outlook.

Garrett thinks the ghost owes his good fortune to me, but I disagree. The library wouldn’t have accepted him as a guardian if they couldn’t explore the depths of their relationship. He and Zosia would have found a way without me.

Defining the term liberally, Kodi wasn’t the only virgin among us. My sexual experience has been sterile, coerced, and traumatic. I’d had to shut myself down to engage with the women my father presented. When I kissed Zosia, it felt like my first kiss.

“Does it upset you? To be the last?” Avery’s question is quiet and searching as he steps closer. He’d probably mistaken my deep contemplation for disappointment. Less than a day ago, we’d speculated that my brother would be the last. We hadn’t factored in the hot-blooded temperaments of two shifters.

I shake my head automatically. “Not at all. The order doesn’t matter. I’ve seen her in my visions for years, and I’m not insecure about our relationship.” Not the emotional aspect, I add silently. The physical component is harder to envision. Loving her has never been uncertain, though; I can’t imagine not loving her.

The influence of time is an important factor, however. I wish we had more time, both individually and together. She has just been thrust into a new world and a new role. Adding new relationships to that can be overwhelming.

If we had more time, I would insist on actual dates. We could enjoy extensive foreplay and intimacy – so much that penetration seemed like just another thing we did together. It would be playful, comfortable, and natural ….

We don’t have the luxury of procrastination. My farsight abilities have become more insistent with the ebb of my wild magic, and I fear we’ll need to act sooner than we realize. The possible futures portraying me in a prison cell have dwindled, but this outcome will escalate Addington’s anger. The only other fragment of clarity I’ve been presented is to trust in the detective we spoke with on the phone.

When Garrett emerges, the three of us are waiting. Although the shifter’s demeanor conveys a slight swagger, I see the signs of shame. Knowing him like I do, this emotion isn’t because of the sex but what instigated it.

“You apologized properly?” My words are clipped because he deserves every bit of anger and censure. Avery’s eyes glimmer crimson, and Kodi crosses his arms over his chest, intentionally hovering several inches above Garrett. I know my brother hates this because few people are taller than he is.

I see the flinch before he manages to hide it. “I did. I begged for forgiveness, and our benevolent mate honored me by accepting it.” The library indicates this as the truth, and his wordiness is further proof of his remorse. My shoulders relax.

“Lucky for you that she’s so benevolent,” Kodi grunts. “Now, show us.”

“Show you what?” Garrett maintains a blank expression as he flips through the logbook on the desk. Most of the items are useless because Sage, Zosia, and the goblins are adept without tools, but they are a great distraction.

Kodi rolls his eyes. The ghost hadn’t needed a boost from me to get fully dressed, which means he should be able to achieve solidity without my magic. “You know what we want to see. I showed mine and Avery showed his.”

I don’t need magic to interpret Kodi’s emotions when my brother whips off his shirt. Although Garrett wears form-fitting clothes, they don’t reveal the tight cut of his muscles. Without the layer of fabric, he resembles a Greek sculpture. The ghost’s uncertainty regarding his after-death manhood makes him regret taunting my brother. I’ve seen Garrett shirtless so often that it no longer fazes me.

Since Kodi is sulking, I look for the mark. It’s relatively small, considering the large canvas, but my brother has always disliked external body modifications like ink and piercings. I echo Kodi’s eye-roll when I realize Garrett could have shown us the feather without removing his shirt.

“Did she tell you what it means?” I ask after I describe the tattoo to Avery.

“Zosia said it’s Egyptian – the symbol of the Goddess Ma’at. It stands for justice, order, and truth.” Although Garrett tries to maintain a casual tone, his chest puffs with pride. The meaning is perfect, but I’m afraid it will further inflate my brother’s hero complex.

“What does the bond feel like?” My tone is shy but eager, and my brother’s expression warms with understanding. It’s been the two of us against a cruel, uncaring world for as long as I can remember. I’d always hoped we’d find this particular future but feared we’d always be alone.

Garrett shrugs his shirt back on and turns his full attention toward me. Yesterday, Avery might have turned away and let us have the illusion of privacy. Although he doesn’t hover like Kodi, he no longer pretends. Kodi has never indulged in the subterfuge. He overhears every conversation and gives zero fucks about propriety. I actually adore this.

“It feels a bit uncomfortable at first,” my brother admits. “You know those cultures where the husband moves in with the in-laws after getting married? Pretend that the family starts treating their new son like they’ve known him for years.” Garrett pauses and waits for my nod to see if I’m following along. I’m not personally acquainted with cultures like this, but it provides a straightforward narrative.

“Good. Now, pretend that all of your new relatives are books and goblins, your wife’s family is super powerful, and she has other husbands. One is a nosy, annoying-as-fuck ghost, one is a prim, proper, and deadly vampire, and one is an alpha shifter who is occasionally an asshole. That’s your scenario. In mine, my wife still has to sleep with my brother ….” His gaze turns pensive, and I finally lose control of the laughter I’ve been trying to restrain.

Avery’s lips twitch and Kodi snorts, muttering that occasional asshole should actually be frequent asshole.

Garrett’s description, while hilarious, isn’t an exaggeration of the truth. When we were younger, we swore that we wouldn’t let a woman come between us after watching several dramatic movies. Since we arrived here, I’ve worried he’d regret this promise. A traditionalist might think Zosia is separating us, but she’s doing the opposite. We don’t have to worry about our wives hating each other.

We whirl around when Zosia flings the door open and emerges on her crutches. Her cheeks are rosy with color, damp strands of hair escape her messy bun, and her eyes sparkle with energy, magic, and satisfaction.

My heart thumps against my ribs as I behold her beauty. Although she’s appeared in my visions a million times, nothing could prepare me for how brightly she shines in person. She isn’t perfect in form or feature, but her strength and resiliency draw me to her.

All four of us turn to stare, even the sightless vampire. Although her flush deepens, she doesn’t falter like she might have a week ago.

“Good morning,” she says when we just stare like love-struck morons. She crutches toward the circulation desk, her movements strong and steady.

“What? Do I have something on my face?”

“Beauty,” Kodi drawls with a wide, cheesy smile.

“Fates save me,” Garrett groans. He waits until she sits down before taking her crutches and placing them within arm’s reach. Then, he leans over and kisses the top of her head. It’s freaking adorable. “The ghost might sound corny, but he’s not lying. There’s nothing wrong with your face or you.”

When he steps away, Avery crouches in front of Zosia’s chair. “ Oui. Your aura is especially blinding this morning, mon trésor ,” the vampire croons. “Your energy and stamina appear much improved. How do you feel?”

“Great. I should be tired, but I feel energized instead.”

“The bonds are giving you strength,” Avery murmurs as he presses his lips to hers. I’m amazed that he finds them without fail every time he kisses her.

I observe these interactions without moving. Warmth spreads through my chest every time Zosia accepts a compliment without denying it. She doesn’t have a feather on her neck, but I think I see golden ink near the nape of her neck.

“We should open soon. Is everything ready?” Zosia asks after the tender kiss with the vampire.

I glance at the clock, but time has little meaning for me and the library mostly agrees. There aren’t any posted hours because she wants us to open and close when we’re ready. Zosia wants predictability for the students sometime in the future, but we aren’t ready yet.

“There’s no rush,” I reassure our librarian as I find my voice and my feet. “Whenever we choose to open is the right time.”

Zosia shows the first sign of uncertainty as she glances at me, perhaps remembering what is in store for the morning. Her eyes glaze over, indicating that she’s accessing the gargoyle’s sight. The creatures are more reliable than electronic security cameras.

“Three students are waiting,” she tells us with a sigh. When she frowns, I predict her next words. “The two detectives are already here too. Tweedle-Dum – um, I mean the one we didn’t talk to last night – is pacing in front of the steps.”

“What did Addington offer him?”

“It could be a threat,” I remind my growling brother. “Not everyone can be bought, and the man seemed desperate.”

Zo’s gaze clears as she focuses on me. “You’re right, of course. What if his family is in danger?”

“If that’s the case, it would be the BSP’s problem.” Garrett’s matter-of-fact tone reflects the way we were nurtured. “Our focus needs to be on the library. We can’t save everyone that Addington bribes or blackmails.” Although he raises a salient point, I foresee this being a future argument. Zosia will want to save everyone. It will be a moot point if we can rob Addington of his influence.

Before Zosia can announce the opening, I swoop in to kiss her. My lips are gentle because I’m certain her mouth has received plenty of attention. Despite my tenderness, I try to convey my emotions, and I think I succeed. Desire warms her cheeks when I pull back, even though she’s been fully sated. I crouch in front of her chair, my hands on the armrests to maintain my balance.

“I have a quote for you.”

My heart skips a beat when she matches my mischievous grin. Both of us ignore Kodi’s and Garrett’s synchronized groans,

“I’m ready.”

“Aristotle Onassis said, ‘We must free ourselves of the hope that the sea will ever rest. We must learn to sail in high winds.’”

“That does not sound reassuring,” Kodi sighs.

My gaze never wavers from Zosia’s as she considers the words. The golden light in her eyes is stronger than ever this morning, and it lights her entire face.

“I’ve been sailing in high winds my entire life.” Her tone conveys relief and dismay.

“Exactly. You’re no stranger to hardship, little lioness, no matter the form it takes. When you have something valuable, challenges and enemies are inevitable. Each storm improves our navigation skills and helps us stay afloat. Today’s won’t be any different.” I pause to let her absorb my meaning. “I refuse to hide from the detectives if it will make matters more difficult. I’ll leave it up to you.”

Her hand covers mine on the armrest. The simple touch, performed automatically, is a sign of her progress. A few days ago, she was scared to touch me.

“Can you stay out of sight unless we need you?”

“Of course, but be careful. I’m wary of the detective Addington has manipulated. Desperation makes men unpredictable.”

“Thank you,” she murmurs. “I’d like to hide your identity as long as we can. Rumors will spread fast among the students, and they have access to powerful people through their families. You spoke of something valuable – imagine the combination of the library and a weather mage.” Her attempt at humor is tempered by her worry. “Maybe we can keep the enemies to one at a time?”

My lips twitch. “It’s probably too late for that, but I’ll only reveal myself if it’s necessary.” Unable to resist, I steal another kiss as I regain my feet. Before I can step away, she catches my hand in hers.

“Bren?”

Her gaze shifts away, and her cheeks redden further. I lean closer, mindful of our audience. “Yes?”

“There’s a hole – right here.” She grimaces with pain as she presses a clenched fist between her breasts. I’m immediately drawn toward the view of her cleavage and the hint of a tattoo above her collar. The action molds her full breasts into enticing curves and utterly confuses me. At first, I seek a literal hole. “Something feels … I feel incomplete without you.” Her stuttered explanation fixes the frayed connection between my brain and my sex drive. “Can we discuss our bond after this is handled?”

My eyes widen with surprise at her courage. I also thought she’d need more time, especially after adding Kodi and Garrett. “I’ll move at your pace, Zo. I don’t want to hurt you by moving too fast.”

“Is that your only concern?”

I crouch again as I contemplate my words. I need to answer honestly, regardless of whether the library will expose my lies or not. She deserves the truth. “I’ve struggled a little, but I think I’ve identified the triggers to my past trauma. I’ve known you for most of my life, and I don’t doubt you or our bond. If I don’t feel like you’re coerced or pressured, my heart and body will accept you without question. Otherwise, it reminds me of the past.”

After a brief pause to consider, she nods. “I think I understand. The situation – knowing we have to bond – does that remind you of the past?”

“No.” I grimace as I search for the right words. “I trust you and the library. It’s just outside forces?”

She nods again. I’m glad the explanation suffices because I doubt I can elaborate. “Soon then?”

Her head tilts toward me as I stand again, and she makes it clear that it’s my choice to close the gap between us. I don’t hesitate. The kiss is more sweet than sexy, but my body reacts to the scent of her and the suggestion in her words and gaze.

Before I met Zosia, I’d never experienced spontaneous desire. The women I was with were insulted by my lackluster responses and often recommended medication or spells as if sharing a sly secret. There was nothing wrong with my body; it only wanted one woman.

I remember Addington bitterly informing us that sphinxes were the most sexual of all shifters. At the time, I’d just thought he wanted to shame my brother, but I understand now. He’d been angry when Zosia’s mother rejected him. Perhaps he correlated a high libido with low standards.

After his first plan failed, he’d schemed and done horrible things to connect his eldest son with the last sphinx. The outcome might be similar, but the situation is different. Zo isn’t a captive, and we are no longer pawns that move at the alpha’s bidding. Our bonds aren’t being manipulated or coerced by anyone other than destiny. Addington’s control has been supplanted by genuine desire, affection, loyalty, respect, and the beginnings of a love that will endure a lifetime.

I pull away from Zosia with a soft, reassuring smile. The possible timelines are still chaotic, but they’ve improved since yesterday, and I try to convey my optimism. She manages a shaky smile in return, and her fingertips stroke my palm as I retreat. The intimacy of the touch makes me shiver.

If I could meddle with time, I would use it to halt this moment. I would grant us time to explore and enjoy each other without any fears or threats looming over our heads. We could hold each other until neither of us remembered the pasts that shaped our fears. I would erase everything that holds us apart and prevents us from becoming one.

This ability doesn’t belong to me. I must grow as she has and put my trust in her and our shared destiny. I must release myself from the hold Addington has over my past and my future.