Page 10 of Gabe (Blue Team #2)

I was going to get a goddamn callus if I fucked my fist one more time.

Over the last three days, this was what my life had come to.

Wake up, jerk off thinking about Evette. Take Evette to the office, work all day, come back to the safehouse with Evette. Eat dinner with Evette. Watch TV with Evette. Go to bed without Evette. Fist my cock thinking about all the things I wanted to do to Evette.

Rinse. Repeat.

Cooper was involved in some of that, though definitely not the times when I had my cock in hand.

Three fucking days.

So why would this morning in the shower be any different?

I’d woken up with my cock hard and aching from another dream starring the beautiful Ms. London.

The worst part was in my dream Evette wasn’t riding my cock, she wasn’t bent over with her perfect heart-shaped ass on display, her mouth wasn’t latched onto my hard cock giving me a blowjob.

No, in my dream she was fully clothed, holding my hand, staring at me intently while we talked.

Talked.

What in the fuck ?

Since when did I hold hands and talk?

And the subject matter of our dream discussion should’ve deflated my hard-on faster than a pair of sweaty balls in my face. Yet there I was standing in the shower, one hand braced on the tile, the other wrapped around my stiffy as I pumped away.

If this continued any longer I was going to have to become ambidextrous and start using my left hand.

What kind of loser jerks off fantasizing about a woman’s smile?

The rush of my orgasm told me I was that loser.

“Fuck.”

My head lulled forward, scalding water pounded on my back, and half-assed pleasure dribbled from my cock.

That was the problem with jerking off twice a day, the relief was momentary and the money shot was seriously lacking.

If there had been an actual woman in the shower with me I would’ve been horrified at my uninspired finish.

An actual woman? What I meant was if Evette had been in the shower with me my orgasm would’ve been brilliant. That was, after I’d given her a good fucking against the wall and heard her scream my name.

Alas, Evette wasn’t in the shower. I was all goddamn alone.

“Someone pissed in his Wheaties.”

Cooper’s charming comment was aimed my way as soon as I entered the kitchen.

If there was one good thing about staying at the safehouse it was getting to know Cooper.

I couldn’t say we’d pulled out the whiskey and swapped stories but we had spent a lot of time together.

I hadn’t needed to read his file to know Cooper had been good at his job.

Zane wouldn’t have hired him otherwise. He was the only man at Z Corps who didn’t have military experience but that didn’t mean he didn’t have tactical knowledge.

However, there was a lot a file can’t tell you.

Information you could only gain from getting to know someone.

And I was pleased to find that Cooper was scary smart, intuitive, and wasn’t afraid to speak his mind.

He also had a sense of humor and fit in with the team seamlessly.

The more time I was around the guy the less I saw his brother in him. There were similarities but Cooper and Jaxon were very different.

“I haven’t said a word,” I noted and walked into the kitchen. “Where’s Evette?”

“Anaya called. She went into the bedroom to talk to her.”

Shit . I knew the call was coming. We’d given Evette a secure phone yesterday just for this purpose after Kyle had checked in and told us he’d explained the situation to his very angry wife.

I debated going into Evette’s room. I wanted to be with her when she talked to her friend.

Evette made it no secret she felt guilty about possibly putting Anaya, Kalee, and Piper in danger.

For the last three days, we’d combed over everything she’d dug up and gone over the emails she was sent.

What she’d considered threatening were more like warnings to steer clear.

None of them had been overly aggressive.

It was strange but the emails were almost like breadcrumbs despite their cautious tone.

Tex, Ace, and Phantom all agreed the pictures were all over a year old, nothing recent to suggest any of the women were being followed. And it was undisputed the rebels had demolished the village and orphanage.

But the question remained—did someone set the rebels on that path or was it a coincidence? And since none of us believed in coincidences of that magnitude we were going with the working theory someone had paid the rebels to hit the village, orphanage, and possibly take out Kalee.

Phantom was pissed . Ace wasn’t too far behind Phantom and both men had enlisted their team to watch over the women. No harm would come to Kalee or Piper even if there was a viable current threat.

But there wasn’t.

The current threat was centered around Evette.

Garrett had been monitoring the cameras around Z Corps and the safehouse. So far, whoever had held Evette at gunpoint hadn’t followed her to Maryland—or if they had they were playing it smart.

“How long has she been in there?” I asked.

“The phone rang about the time the shower went on.” Coop paused and an irritating smile formed. “Thought you SEAL types were in and out. Didn’t take you for the type of man who lingers.”

Ass.

“We’re multifaceted, that’s what makes us so dangerous. We know when to take our time and linger and when to get the fuck out.”

“And that applies to alone time in the shower?”

My bark of laughter took me by surprise. I wasn’t feeling particularly happy but I had to hand it to Coop—he was funny.

“Walked right into that one.”

A seriousness crept into Coop’s stare and I wished he’d go back to breaking my balls.

No such luck.

“You doing okay?”

Fuck no, I wasn’t okay. I was lusting after a woman who I could never have and dreaming about her talking to me. And the fuck of it was, lust had very little to do with my present feelings.

I decided on a little honesty.

“I just need to stay away from her.”

“Why?”

It would take me a year to list all of the reasons why.

But the biggest was I wasn’t cut out for a serious relationship.

Those tended to lead to marriage and families, places I wasn’t capable of going.

I’d known from an early age how life could turn and leave you destitute despite your best efforts.

I would never put a wife and child through that.

As a single man, life was easy to navigate but the responsibility of a family would be crippling.

I’d witnessed the devastation firsthand.

I’d been the child in that scenario and fear and hunger were two things I vowed never to feel again.

“Because it wouldn’t be right. For starters, she’s Anaya’s friend. She’s close to Kyle. And one look at the woman and you cannot miss she doesn’t do meaningless. ”

“But meaningless is all you’re after,” Coop surmised.

“Yep.”

“Good to know.”

Coop was back to smiling and my gut twisted at the sight.

He wouldn’t dare…would he?

“What’s good to know?”

“That you’re not interested. Garrett was going on and on about how smart she was. I guess they bonded over some geek tech shit that went over my head but Evette understood and started drilling Garrett for more information.”

Evette, drilling, and Garrett used in the same sentence made my blood pressure skyrocket.

What the fuck ?

“Garrett needs to keep his goddamn hands to himself.”

And his dick but thankfully I managed to keep that tidbit to myself.

“I don’t get it. You’re not interested, Garrett is. And he doesn’t strike me as a man who would fuck her and not call.”

Oh, Garrett would call all right—for seconds and thirds.

But that was all Evette would get from him.

That was all any woman got from Garrett.

It was common knowledge that Garrett was hung up on a woman from his past and he was still in love with her.

Many a woman had tried to sway Garrett and they were always shown the door.

Evette wouldn’t be one of those women.

That was why I was feeling murderous. I was simply protecting her. It had nothing to do with jealousy or the sick churning in my gut at the thought of another man touching her.

Nope.

Couldn’t be.

“You’re wrong about Garrett.”

“No, Gabe. The only person who’s wrong is you.”

Before I could school my new teammate on all the reasons I was one hundred percent correct a red-faced Evette came out of her bedroom.

Forcing myself not to rush to her side I stayed rooted in the kitchen and asked, “Everything okay? ”

Sad eyes met mine and the need to get to Evette grew.

“At least she doesn’t hate me but she’s super pissed.”

Evette’s voice cracking was my undoing and I could no longer keep my distance.

With each step closer toward her I knew it was a mistake but I couldn’t get my feet to stop moving.

When I pulled her into a hug every cell in my body screamed out a warning I ignored.

And with her pressed tight to my chest, my arms wrapped around her, Evette’s around me, I was in a new kind of hell.

The kind that was beyond torture. Something that was so wrong but felt so damn right and I never wanted to let her go.

The temptation to give in and fall in love was so great I had to close my eyes for a second and remember the first time I had to beg our neighbor for food.

And once the floodgates opened the memories rushed in like a bucket of ice water.

Fear and hunger.

“I know Anaya. She won’t stay mad for long,” I told her.

“I don’t know,” Evette croaked. “She was really mad I didn’t tell her what I was doing. And madder when I didn’t call when I almost got hit by a car.”

Hit by a car?

“What are you talking about? When did you almost get hit by a car?”

Evette stiffened and my body followed suit. What she didn’t do was answer me.

“Evette?”

“I didn’t think of it until I was talking to Anaya.

” Slowly she tilted her head back to look at me but made no move to fully disconnect.

“About a week after I started poking around I was crossing the street. From the parking lot at work to the front of the building. I had the little white man thingy and I was in the crosswalk. I was almost to the curb when a car made a right and almost hit me. He probably would’ve if Mark from accounting didn’t do a rushing forward tackle.

It’s a good thing he was a cornerback in college. He got us moving and out of the way.”

I wasn’t sure if I was grateful for the Mark guy or annoyed he’d tackled her or pissed as fuck she hadn’t remembered to tell us when she filled us in on the other attempts on her life.

“Are there any other times you almost died that you forgot to tell us about?”

Evette flinched. I would’ve felt like a shithead for my tone if we weren’t discussing her life being in danger.

“Well…” she trailed off which triggered an unfortunate reaction.

Not a verbal reaction—an internal, emotional response that was unhealthy.

Walls started to crack. And I was so busy doing a piss poor patch job that I missed the first tear but I didn’t miss all the ones that followed.

Each tear that streamed down her beautiful face weakened the cement I’d shoved in the fractures.

“Don’t cry,” I pleaded.

I heard Cooper murmuring behind us. He had to be on the phone because whatever he was saying wasn’t meant for us.

“I think there’s more I didn’t tell you about. Weird things that happened but I didn’t think they had anything to do with…this.”

I tamped down my irrational fear. She was safe in my arms in Maryland. No one was going to hurt her, or as it were try to hurt her.

“Stop crying, babe, you’re totally safe here.” Then for some inexplicable, stupid reason, I kissed her forehead.

It was barely a brush of my lips against her skin yet I might as well have stuck my tongue in her mouth while she was grinding on my cock.

I was losing my mind.

Evette took a deep breath and my willpower stretched not to look down as her chest expanded.

Yep, I’d gone insane.

“I feel like an idiot.”

“You shouldn’t. Let’s have a seat and we’ll go over everything again. This time, don’t leave out anything. Even if it seems stupid or insignificant I need to know.”

She gave me a curt nod and I was grateful when she took a step back.

Note to self: self, never under any circumstances hold this woman again. And never, no matter what, kiss her .

With that lame warning, I followed her to the couch.

Distance.

That was what I needed.

Though seeing her sit on the edge of the sofa with her knees bouncing I knew there weren’t enough miles I could put between us that would make this need go away.