Page 31 of Furious (The Six Six Six Rule #2)

Bittersweet

ARES

I ’m pretty sure Calvin Fox is doing something very wrong and very illegal and that his job at Noel’s barbershop is just a cover up.

If it was up to me, I would have followed him. People like him aren’t that smart, and I know he would inevitably lead me to whatever he’s hiding.

Unfortunately, though, I’ve been caught up in a string of back to back twelve-hour shifts. After that first fortuitous shift at the old marina, we’ve been sent to patrol a completely different location on the opposite side of town.

The fact that Chance and Lev are involved in whatever Fox is cooking up has been keeping me up at night, too. A part of me wants to confront them and find out what the fuck is going on.

I was the one who gave them the heads up that Fox was in town, so I think they owe me.

There’s only one reason why they would keep something like that secret from me. It must be something illegal. Which isn’t a big stretch of the imagination since Fox is mixed up in it.

The other night, at Dad and Kelly’s welcome home party, I tried to give them the opportunity to come clean by hinting that I had found out where Fox was working. All I got was sheepish expressions and an outright lie when they claimed not to have seen Fox at all.

If this is how they want to play this, I can beat them at their own game. I have a week off for my birthday and I’m planning to be their shadow. I just hope that whatever they’re doing isn’t so bad that I can’t protect them.

A knock on my door pulls me out of my reveries.

“Hey.”

Zara is the only person who can make me smile today. Especially since she looks stunning in a little white sundress that makes her look like a dream.

“Happy birthday.” She says softly.

I trap her chin between two fingers and brush my lips against hers. Today is a difficult day for me, and spending it with Zara is the only way to rescue it. If not, I would probably already be black out drunk and it isn’t even noon.

“Happy birthday, bro.” Lev is standing behind her. “I’ll come back to get Zara tomorrow morning, like we agreed.”

“Thank you.” I say, and I really mean it. “What are you gonna do all day, since you’re supposed to be with Zara?”

“I’m going to hole up in my room and play video games.” He shrugs. “Chance might come to hang later. We told Kelly and Scott that we were going out shopping in Shell Cove and then have dinner at my place. They probably think we’ll be fucking all day.”

Zara blushes. “They totally think that. Your dad told us to be careful, and he sounded so weird that I swear I was afraid he was going to give Lev a box of condoms.”

I bark out a laugh. “You have no idea how possible that scenario really was. He gave us…” I almost mention Atlas, but I don’t want to talk about him. Not yet. “He gave me condoms before prom. He did the same thing with Chance and Lev.”

Zara sighs. “I already had that conversation with my mom the other day, after Lev and I fell asleep in his room. She knows I’m covered with birth control. Speaking to her was embarrassing enough. I hope she tells Scott that we don’t need his help.”

Lev chuckles, shaking his head. “Nah, don’t sweat it too much. Scott means well. You aren’t a part of the family until he’s given you a box of condoms.”

She punches his bicep, but there’s no heat in it. “If he gives me condoms, I’m never going to be able to look at him again.”

“Anyway kids,” Lev pulls her into a hug and kisses her the same way I just did a second ago. “You know where to find me if you need me. I wouldn’t wander around town too much, because if someone we know sees you together, our cover is gonna be blown.”

It makes perfect sense. “Don’t worry,” I reassure him. “I know exactly where Dad is going to be today.”

We watch Lev drive off in comfortable silence.

“Aren’t you going to invite me in?” Zara asks once his car is no longer in sight.

“If it wasn’t broad daylight, I would really suspect you’re a vampire. You’re obsessed with being invited in.” I tease.

Zara glares at me. “FYI, not all vampires are forced to hide from sunlight. Some of them are day walkers. In some stories they use magic rings, in others they use special spells to enchant specific places or even put tempered glass in their windows to block the UV rays and being able to move around their houses during the day.”

“Which one are you?” I chuckle.

“Shut up, Ares.”

Her glare is so cute that I stop ribbing her. “I’m not inviting you in, because we aren’t staying.”

I take her hand, leading her to the jeep parked in my assigned spot. “Word on the street is that someone passed her driving test.” I give her the keys. “Wanna drive?”

The smile on her face is just what I need on a difficult day like today. “Really?”

I shrug. “You’ve already driven the jeep, and we made it home in one piece.”

“Where are we going?”

I open the driver’s door for her. “We’re getting something to eat first. I’m sure you can negotiate the Jack In The Box drive through and then I’ll give you directions.”

“Ok.”

I’m a little nervous about this little day trip, but it’s something I need to do and bringing Zara with me feels right.

With breakfast in a bag on my lap, we drive through town past the hospital and the empty lot where Dad hopes to build the arena for the professional hockey team he wants to bring to Star Cove.

We pass the military base and the old lighthouse, driving to the opposite side of town from the college campus. The airport is a few miles down this road, but we don’t need to go that far.

“Turn left here, please.” I instruct her as we come into view of a road line with tall cypress trees.

There’s a lump in my throat and my palms feel clammy. I haven’t been back here in two years, since the day of Atlas’s funeral.

“Can you carry our drinks?” I ask her, grabbing the bag with the food, a folded blanket from the trunk, and another small black plastic bag.

Zara locks the car, and she follows me with the drink holder in her hand. Just before we step through the cemetery gate, she laces her fingers with mine.

I hesitate for a second, stopping to look at her. There’s no pity in her eyes. What I see tells me that bringing her here with me was the right thing to do. Her green gaze says that she’s here with me and for me.

Despite not having been back here in almost two years, my feet carry me straight to my twin brother’s gravestone.

I was prepared in case I didn’t remember where he was.

Last time I had taken a couple of the sedatives my therapist had prescribed me and I went through the funeral in a daze.

I was so doped, it’s surprising I was able to stand upright.

Just in case, I downloaded a map of the cemetery to my phone; but it turns out that muscle memory is more reliable than I thought.

Seeing his name and our date of birth carved into the gray stone feels wrong and yet so final.

If Zara notices the way my hand is shaking, as I pass her the bag with the food and place my hand over the top of the gravestone, she doesn’t say anything.

“Hey brother,” my voice comes out deep and scratchy, giving away that I’m fighting to keep the tears that have welled in my eyes from spilling. “I’m sorry I haven’t been visiting you before. I’m sure you understand how hard it is. You would have felt the same way if it was me in here.”

The second the words leave my mouth, I know they aren’t true. Atlas would have probably been here every day.

One thing I know for sure, though, is that Atlas would have understood how hard it was to keep breathing without him. When a part of me had been ripped from me leaving a gaping hole where my heart had been.

Up until a few weeks ago, just the thought of coming here would have made me spiral.

For the longest time, being numb was the only way to keep living.

I was afraid that if I allowed myself to feel anything, the pain would have taken me under.

His absence took all the space, all my energy, and the only way to cope with it was to pretend it wasn’t there.

When Zara stepped back into my life, something shifted.

There was no way to stop the feelings her presence caused in me.

For the first time in two years, I want to feel.

I want to live without going through the motions like I’ve done for all this time.

I need space where Atlas’s absence sits so heavily.

“Look who’s here, brother.” I take Zara’s hand, pulling her a little closer. The contract grounds me, and the knot in the pit of my stomach loosens a little. “You remember Zara, right?”

I used to tell Atlas everything. Sometimes I didn’t even need to actually speak, because he felt my emotions and I felt his.

Without him, I’ve kept everything bottled up inside. I don’t know if he can still feel my emotions from wherever he is now, so I tell him everything.

About Dad running for mayor, the changes he made to our town and our family. My new job. The wedding.

When I’m done, there’s a beat of silence. Atlas was the best listener and he often would take a few moments to reflect on what he just heard before he voiced his opinion.

I wonder what he would think about the recent developments in town and in our family.

But most of all, I wonder what he would think about Dad’s demands to treat Zara like a sibling.

Would he think I’m wrong for going against his wishes?

And what would he make of the fact that Chance and Lev want Zara, too?

Would he tell me to walk away or to fight for her?

Atlas was never a quitter, so I know the answer to my last question.

“I’m sure you haven’t forgotten that today is our birthday,” I tell him. “The big two-one. I’m sure if you were here, we would have a huge party. Without you, it doesn’t feel right. But I couldn’t let today go by without acknowledging it. Look, I brought you your favorite breakfast.”