Page 27 of Furious (The Six Six Six Rule #2)

The Devil Rides On Two Wheels

ZARA

“ M om, I’m sorry.” I close my bedroom door behind me and turn to look at my mother.

I honestly don’t know what to expect. She was surprisingly civil downstairs, but was that just a muted reaction for Lev’s benefit?

There’s a real possibility she’s about to yell at me now that we’re behind closed doors. She sits on my bed.

“I know. You already said that.” Her voice comes out softly, almost like a whisper. “Can you come here and sit down, please?” she pats the comforter next to her.

I don’t really want to, but I feel guilty for making her worry, so I do as she asked and lower myself by her side.

“Look Zara,” she sighs. “Two years ago, I would have grounded you, maybe.”

I barely manage to stifle the snort at the understatement of the century.

“Maybe? I don’t mean to be rude, Mom, but you would have definitely grounded me.

” And that would have been just the beginning of my punishment.

Last time I ended up on a one-way flight to Connecticut and was given no choice in the matter.

“You’re right, I would have.” She admits. “But things have changed, Zara. You’re an adult now. And I can’t stop you from living your life just because I worry. I’m actually grateful that you agreed to live at home this year, so we have the chance to reconnect.”

Again, she gave me no choice when she canceled my dorm room on campus. But I don’t point that out either.

I half expect her to give me a speech on the lines of “my house, my rules,” but she surprises me again.

“I like Lev, sweetheart. He’s a wonderful young man and so good looking.”

Ok. “But?” I wish if there’s a reprimand coming my way, Mom would just get to it.

Instead, she blinks, confused. “There are no buts, Zara. Lev is smart and attractive and Scott has known his parents for years. Thankfully, he abandoned his childish dreams of becoming a professional motorcycle racer, and he’s getting an education.

I couldn’t ask for a better boyfriend for you.

All I ask, if possible, is that you let me know if you’re not coming home, so I don’t worry. ”

It’s impossible to hide my shock. “That’s all you’re asking?”

Mom nods. “Yeah. I understand you guys might want to be alone. I’ve been young, too.”

“You’re still young, Mom.” It’s true. She married my dad right out of high school and by the time she turned twenty, they already had me.

She giggles. I haven’t seen this side of her since she left Dad.

“I suppose I still am sort of young. And I have a wonderful, sexy husband. So I don’t blame you for wanting to enjoy yourself with Lev.”

My jaw almost hits the floor. She never talked about sex with me before. “Oh my God.” I gasp. “TMI, Mom.”

“Oh, come on,” she laughs again. “I just came back from my honeymoon. The only reason why we got a tan is that Scott rented a secluded villa with a private pool. The staff was very discreet, and we spent most of our time naked. I have no tan lines. At all.”

Heat rises to my face.

“Stop.” I chuckle. “How am I ever going to look Scott in the eye at breakfast? You can’t say stuff like that to me about my stepfather.

He’s the town mayor, for crying out loud.

” I’m proud of myself for the last minute save.

I was totally going to say “for fuck’s sake,” but I doubt Mom was going to appreciate that.

Mom grabs my hand. “Aren’t you happy that my husband makes me happy?”

I stop laughing. “I am. I love the fact that he loves you. I’m still getting to know him; but as long as he treats you the way you deserve to be treated, our relationship will be on solid ground.”

She looks at me for a long moment, her eyes shining with barely contained emotion.

“Thank you, sweetheart. Look, I know things between the two of us have been difficult these past few years. Part of the reason is that you’ve always looked up to your father, and I was so angry with him.

I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to forgive him completely for how he behaved during our marriage, but it’s easier to look at those times now that I’m in a great relationship.

Your dad was the man of my dreams when I was your age.

It was hard to accept that when you love a bad boy, you end up being treated badly.

I loved the fact that you adored him, Zara.

And John wasn’t a bad father. I know he loves you and he’s proud of you.

I never wanted to keep you from seeing him.

I just wanted to protect you from making my same mistakes. ”

I exhale a shuddering breath as tears well in my eyes.

“I know, Mom. And I know that a lot of time when you said I couldn’t visit him, it wasn’t to keep me away from him.

It was because he canceled last minute and you’d look like the bad guy rather than cause me a bigger disappointment by telling me the truth. ”

Mom blinks again, struggling not to cry. “Yeah. Things became harder when you grew up and you started to see through my attempts to cover for him.”

I ask the question I never asked her before. “Why did you cover for him?”

She laughs, but this time there’s no mirth in it. “Because I would rather you be mad at me than heartbroken that he would drop his daughter to party with his crush of the week.”

Yeah. I started seeing that when he flaked on me several times during the school holidays once I was at boarding school. He missed my graduation because of some “work commitments,” but his social media posts on a yacht with a blonde, top model who was probably my age tell a different story.

“I’m sorry for acting like a spoiled brat, Mom. I know Dad means well, but deep down, he’s selfish. He’s always going to do what he wants and put himself first, even if it hurts his loved ones.”

Mom nods. “Exactly. John is like the sun. When you have his attention, you feel like you’re on top of the world. But his attention is fickle. It’s either so intense that you burn yourself, or so absent that you’re left in the coldest darkness, wondering what you did wrong.”

I can relate to that. Every time Dad canceled plans to spend time together, I blamed myself.

If I had gotten better grades, or a faster lap the last time we rode together, he would have made time for me.

The truth is that it didn’t matter what I did.

If something more interesting came along, Dad would drop me like a hot potato.

“I’m glad Scott puts you first, Mom.” I mean it.

She smiles. “Yes. And by the looks of it, Lev does the same with you. He could have dropped you off this morning and made himself scarce. But he came in to talk to me and to take responsibility for his part in the whole misunderstanding.”

Mom is right. Lev wants me to be happy. To the point that he won’t force me to choose. He would rather share me with Chance and Ares than hurt me by demanding that I let them go.

I love him.

The realization isn’t shocking. I knew I was falling for him, but I think I’m a goner. It might be too soon to tell him, though. I need to wait for the right time. I’ve never said I love you to a man who isn’t my dad. When I do it, I want it to be special.

Mom, however, doesn’t need to hear me say it. She sees it in my eyes. “You’re in love with him.” It isn’t a question.

“I am.”

She pulls me into an excited hug. “Well, I approve. Just make sure you two are being safe. You both have school to think about. And I’m too young to become a grandmother.”

“Mom!” I yelp.

Another one of those carefree giggles I really like on her. “You’re still on the pill, right? And make sure he commits to being exclusive if you decide to ditch the condoms.”

“Oh my God, stop.” I groan. “Is this turning into a conversation about the birds and the bees?”

“Ha, no.” She teases me. “I’ve done my part when you were younger. I just want to make sure that when you have a baby, it’s a conscious choice, not an accident.”

The words tumble out of my mouth before I can think better of it. “Was I an accident?”

Her hands fly to her chest. “God, no. John and I were young, but we wanted you. The second we got married, we wanted a gaggle of little ones running around the house. And had it been up to him, we would have had more children. I was the one who didn’t want anymore.”

Guilt twists my insides. “Was I too much of a terror?”

Mom shakes her head. She smiles, but her eyes are sad.

“No, it isn’t that. You were a lively little girl, but you were adorable.

The reason why I didn’t want any more kids is that your father couldn’t be faithful.

Why bring more children into our wreck of a family?

John started cheating on me while I was pregnant with you.

Or at least, that’s when I found out. As far as I know, maybe it wasn’t even the first time.

I kicked him out of the house a month before you were born.

He promised he would never do it again if I took him back and I believed him.

It happened again and again. So many times that I even stopped asking him where he had been.

Even though I did everything I could to save our marriage, I realized I had two choices.

Accept that your father would never be faithful to me, or leave him.

In my heart, I knew we wouldn’t be together forever because bad boys rarely change.

It was an impossible choice between staying with the man I loved but losing respect for myself little by little every day, or breaking my heart and yours by leaving. ”

I had never known all this. Mom had told me Dad cheated, but it’s the first time I consider how heartbreaking it must have been for Mom.

My throat feels tight. I’m fighting the tears that keep welling in my eyes. “Did you stay because of me?” I whisper.