Page 22 of Forgiving His Past (Eagle’s Nest Securities #5)

“I cannot eat another bite.” Kam settled back against the wooden booth’s high back and sighed.

“I have to admit…” Van took a swig of iced tea and swallowed. “You make damn good mac and cheese.”

She laughed because the macaroni and cheese side dish she’d been in charge of making had come from a box. “And you, sir, seem to have mastered the art of grilling a frozen hamburger patty.”

“We make a good team.”

Van’s response seemed to be spoken without thought, the slight widening of his black eyes giving away the man’s own surprise at his own rumbled comment. Kam smiled to herself, wondering if he even realized he did that.

She hoped not, because she found it absolutely adorable.

“Are you finished?” She slid out of the built-in booth that made up one half of the boat’s small kitchen.

He nodded, wiping his mouth with a paper napkin after having taken another drink. “I am, but I can?—”

“Nonsense.” Kam was already reaching for his plate and silverware. “You drove in the sun for hours while I sat like a bump on a log. The least I can do is take care of the clean-up. ”

Rather than argue, as she’d expected, the sexy former SEAL relented almost instantly. “Thank you.”

“Of course.”

Their gazes held a moment longer before she turned and headed for the sink. Sliding his large form from his seat, Van spoke from behind her as she turned on the water and began filling the tiny sink with hot, soapy water.

“If you’re good here, I think I’ll go rinse off for the night.”

“Go.” She waved him away without looking up from what she was doing. “Relax. You’ve more than earned it.”

From the corner of her eye, Kam saw him disappear into his bedroom, sliding the pocket door behind him as he went. Several minutes passed as she took care of the clean-up, doing everything she could to ignore the running water coming from the other side of his door.

Van. In the shower. Naked.

Not a good idea, Kam.

No, she didn’t suppose it was. Of course, as life had sometimes taught her…some of the worst ideas yielded the most delicious rewards.

Her hands became lost in the sudsy water as she glanced over at his door. As she set about finishing the job for which she’d volunteered, Kam let her mind wander back to the conversation they’d had earlier, during their first stop.

My wife and son are both dead, and it’s all because of me.

It was a ridiculous notion, and one she’d easily dismissed. But poor, complicated Van was absolutely convinced that his wife’s and unborn child’s deaths were his sin to bear.

Her heart ached for the grieving husband and father-to-be he’d been all those years ago. She was literally on the verge of tears for the man who’d lived every day since clearly blaming himself for someone else’s act of pure evil.

By the time the kitchen was clean and her burgeoning tears had all dried up, Van was finished with his evening shower .

“Shower’s yours if you want it.” He reappeared seemingly from nowhere.

Kam turned her gaze his way, finding his imposing form stealing nearly every bit of space in the open doorway between the kitchen and living space.

Her breath caught in her lungs, and her lower belly tingled with arousal.

She found him sexy as sin in jeans and a t-shirt.

But put the man in a pair of dark gray joggers and plain black hoodie, and she was suddenly very tempted to see just how far she could take things with the man who, until quite recently, had wished her dead.

“Perfect timing.” A smile that was far too wide flashed across her face.

“Thanks for doing that.” He glanced at the empty sink, stove, and small drainer containing the air-drying dishes.

“It was my pleasure,” she told him truthfully.

His dark eyes found hers once more. “You sure you’re okay staying here tonight?”

It was sweet that he felt the need to be sure.

“I am.” Kam nodded before letting him know, “I trust you, Donovan.”

“You shouldn’t.”

As far as responses went, that wasn’t exactly the one she’d expected to hear.

“No?” She finished folding the handtowel she’d used before placing it neatly over the sink’s edge. “Well, let’s see. You could have killed me in the alley, but you didn’t.”

“I put you in a choke hold until you were unconscious, stuck a needle in the side of your neck to drug you, kidnapped you, and tied you to a chair.”

“Don’t forget the duct tape,” she quipped. “A nice touch, by the way.”

One corner of the lips she longed to taste gave the slightest of quivers, and though she could tell he was trying hard to hide it, it was obvious the man was fighting a smile .

“Like that, did you?”

Kam didn’t bother hiding the wide grin or her breathy chuckle as she listed off additional reasons she felt safe around the stoic man.

“When those RPGs struck the hotel, you could have left me to die. Or, at the very least, you could have taken cover first before worrying about my well-being. Instead, you dove straight for me, even risking injury to your hand by protecting my head from slamming into the floor. You led me safely through the burning rubble, brought me to Seattle, allowed me inside your friends’ home… ”

“You had information that was vital to my team’s investigation.”

“You’ve provided me with a roof over my head, food in my belly, and a place to lay my head.”

“Can’t get intel from a dead woman.”

“No.” She smiled again. “I don’t suppose you can. But you also gave me the most relaxing day I can remember ever experiencing, and you…”

Kam let her words trail for fear she’d cause him unintentional pain.

“I what?” Van stared back at her with an expectant look plastered across his tanned face.

“You shared something very personal with me, and for that…and all the other things I have mentioned…I am very grateful.”

Silence passed between them as their gazes held tight, as if tied together by an invisible string. To avoid upsetting him or causing him more pain, she forced herself to turn away.

“I think I will take you up on the offer of that shower.” She spoke again, mainly to break up the uncomfortable silence.

Without a word, Van gave her a single dip of his chin before moving out of the way to give her room. She sent him a quick smile as she quickly passed by, but it wasn’t until she closed herself inside the bathroom that she felt as though she could fully breathe.

What was it about him that made her feel this way? It wasn’t as if this was her first experience being alone with an attractive man. She was thirty-four, for crying out loud. And much to the dismay of her mother—may she rest in peace—Kam wasn’t a virgin.

She didn’t sleep around like other women she knew. Quite the opposite, in fact.

Thanks to the traditional ways of her people, she’d gotten a very late start when it came to matters of the heart. And there had only ever been two men from her past she’d felt worthy of sharing her bed.

Both men she’d met in college. The first had been during her undergraduate studies. The second she’d begun dating a few months prior to her father having grown ill.

Since then, Kam had been focused on dealing with the aftermath of losing not one but both of her parents in a relatively short period of time. After that, she’d become an unwitting player in someone’s very sick game.

One surrounding Van and his team, and their teammate’s death. Farzad Akimi, and…

Me.

She spent longer in the shower than she had at Cassie and Archer’s house, but not too long for fear the boat’s hot water would run cold. It wasn’t until she was out of the shower and drying herself off that she realized…

My pajamas.

Technically they were Cassie’s. But what concerned Kam most was that she’d left them folded neatly on her bed.

Out there. Where he was.

And she was only wearing a towel.

Her eyelids fell shut with a long, drawn-out sigh. Knowing she couldn’t very well hide out in here for the rest of the night, she took a deep breath, opened her eyes, and then…she opened the door.

With her head held high, Kam clutched the place between her breasts where she’d knotted the towel to keep it from falling. She probably looked like a drowned rat, having only towel-dried her long, wet hair, but the sooner she got this over with, the sooner her embarrassment could pass.

She reached for the door but paused long enough to listen for any possible movement within the cabin. Hearing none, she felt hopeful that Van had gone back out onto the deck. So she opened the bathroom door…and ran smack-dab into a wall of muscle.

“Oh!” She started to stumble back.

Moving much faster than she’d expect for a man his size, he wrapped an arm around her and held her steady with one of his strong hands resting against her lower back.

“Easy there.” His deep rumble vibrated from his chest to hers.

For a moment, they both stood perfectly still with the fronts of their bodies fully pressed against one another’s.

Even with the towel and his hoodie as barriers, Kam could feel the way his heart was pounding inside his chest. Hers beat to the same excited rhythm, and she couldn’t help but wonder if he felt the same attraction toward her as she did him.

A few seconds later, the answer became more than a little obvious. A whole lot more if the steely bulge pressing against her lower belly was any indication. Just like that, thoughts of him naked returned, only this time, the images filling Kam’s brain weren’t solely of him, but rather of them.

Together. In his bed. Their bodies and limbs becoming intertwined in a powerful eruption of pleasure.

“I-I left my pajamas on the bed.” She whispered the truth about why she’d come out of the bathroom in such a state of undress .

“I can get them for you,” he offered, though the man made no attempt to move.

His dark gaze lowered to her lips, the heat in his gaze impossible to miss. He started to lean in. Kam lifted up onto the balls of her feet with the intention of meeting him halfway.