Page 48

Morgana

T he salt air caresses my cheek, and I listen hard to the noise all around me. I’ve never heard anything like it before—a momentous roar that still manages to be strangely calming. So constant, like the beating of a heart.

I’ve never seen the ocean before. I’ve seen drawings in books of course, but those could never do this justice. As I stand on the beach, looking out across the choppy gray waters, it fills all my senses. The endlessness of it strikes me, reminding me of the depths of a certain pair of eyes.

Footsteps crunch across the sand toward me.

“That fishmonger was very friendly. Alastor had to barely use any magic to get directions,” Leon says.

It’s been two weeks since we left Filusia, and I still haven’t gotten used to him in his glamour.

Sure, I saw his human form often enough when we were first traveling through Trova, but then I was spoiled during our time in Filusia.

I miss his sharp, fae features and maybe even the height a little.

He still looks mostly like Leon, but most of Leon isn’t enough for me anymore when I want all of him.

There’s a yip down by the waves, and a flock of gulls scatters away from the flash of reddish fur gamboling through the surf.

I am unreservedly glad for the glamour they’ve supplied for Dots.

A four-tailed creature from the Miravow would attract far too much notice.

So for the moment Dots resembles a large, russet-coated dog.

He didn’t like the collar that the glamour’s attached to him at first, but once I explained that we needed it so he could stay by my side, the animal accepted it begrudgingly.

Now he bounds up to us, shaking off his wet fur and flicking salt water all over my skirts.

“Apparently, Will’s house is ten minutes west of here, just beyond those rocks.”

“Right on the sea front?” I smile. “That was the plan. He said he wanted to wake up to the sea.”

He talked to me so many times about the home he’d have.

He said I’d always be welcome there…and in just a few minutes more, I’ll find out if he meant it.

Deciding to come see Will when we were still back in Filusia seemed straightforward, but now we’re here in Gullert, I’m hit with a wave of nerves.

I’m desperate to see my old friend again—the man who was the closest thing I ever had to a father—and yet so much has changed since I last saw him.

Leon must be getting better guessing what I’m feeling, because he lays a hand on my elbow now.

“Are you sure about this?” he asks.

I hesitate, not sure how to answer. “I don’t know if he’ll want to help us, but I’m sure we can trust him. Will doesn’t even really believe in the gods, so he won’t sell us out to the Temple.”

“That might be true, but he also spent his life in the employment of the palace. Are you sure his loyalty is to you rather than to the woman currently sitting on the throne?”

“Yes, I’m sure. He’s my friend,” I say, slightly offended by Leon’s suggestions despite my own doubts. “That’s where his loyalty will lie.”

“A friend who helped keep you captive most of your life?” Leon says skeptically.

“Maybe he thought he had a good reason for holding me against my will,” I say, giving Leon a pointed look.

“Touché,” he says with a grimace. He turns to make his way back up the beach toward the others, gesturing for me to follow. Hyllus is looking in some rock pools with Tira—who’s as excited as I am to experience the seaside for the first time—but the others are waiting on the sand looking alert.

My conversation with Leon has only stoked my anxiety. Tira notices my quietness, falling into step beside me as we follow the directions to Will’s house.

“It’ll be nice to see him again,” Tira says casually. “Mom always said he was a good egg.”

My heart aches at her use of the past tense. “Yeah, she could always spot the good ones,” I say. Tira shares my sad smile.

“If you don’t mind…You can tell him about what happened to her, but I’d prefer not to get into it if we don’t have to, okay?” she says.

I nod. “Of course. Whatever you say.”

Tira wants to protect herself against the pain of that conversation, and I want to protect myself too. I’m afraid Will might not be the warm, safe place I remember him to be. I’ve been betrayed by so many people in my life since Gallawing. What if he just ends up being another one of them?

Yet I had put Leon on that list too, and I thought I’d hate him forever for it.

Since then, I’ve learned that choices can be more complicated than I’d realized.

More importantly, he also showed me that he could work to make up for his mistakes—that he could be open with me and make sacrifices to give me what I needed.

I felt safe with Leon before I had any actual reasons to trust him. But maybe sometimes it’s worth sticking with your choice to have faith in someone.

“Oh, it’s so cute,” Tira breathes as the cottage comes into view.

The little wooden house looks like it’s burrowed its way into the sand, banks rising up around its walls. A porch out front provides room for a deck chair with fishing gear propped up beside it. A string of seashells hangs above the door, clacking lightly in the breeze.

“Shall I?” I say as we all stop in front of the house.

“Go ahead,” Leon says.

I take a deep breath and knock.

“Just a moment!” a familiar voice calls from inside. The sound of it makes my heart jump. For just a second, I’m a little girl back in Gallawing, Will calling through the grounds for me.

The door swings open, and a gray-haired man comes into view, stooping slightly in the low doorway.

Will was always too collected to be easily shocked, but his eyes widen now.

“Morgana?”

“Hello Will,” I say softly.

Without another word, he holds open his arms, and I gladly step into them.

“I thought you might be dead,” he says, squeezing me tightly enough to push all the air out of my lungs. “I’ve heard terrible things about all kinds of goings on in Elmere, and about you disappearing.”

“The last few months haven’t been the easiest,” I admit.

It’s now that he looks beyond me to take in the seven strangers, Tira, and what looks like a large dog.

He blinks at them, then his eyes narrow.

He suspects something isn’t entirely as it seems with the group.

He didn’t spend a lifetime working as a guard without picking up a few things—such as, perhaps, how to spot a glamour.

At the very least, he knows soldiers when he sees them, no matter how they’re disguised.

“And these are…?”

“You know Tira,” I say, who holds her hand up in greeting. “And these are friends of mine,” I say, looking around. The beach is pretty empty, but I still don’t want to say more out in the open. “Do you mind if we come inside?”

It’s pretty surreal, watching Leon’s unit traipse into the house, ducking their heads in polite greeting as we pile into the little cottage.

Will shows us into a room that serves as the living room, dining room, and kitchen.

The soldiers perch where they can, wedged shoulder to shoulder on the windowsills or on the arms of the plump armchair in the corner.

For want of more room, Tira settles down on the floor with Dots, who curls up beside her.

Leon stays standing by the door, a quiet sentinel, as Will and I sit down at the small round dining table.

“It’s lovely, Will,” I say sincerely, looking around at the cozy space—at least what I can see that isn’t blocked by bodies.

“It does what it needs to,” Will says modestly, still glancing warily around at the others. “I just don’t usually have so many visitors.”

There’s a clatter as Stratton knocks a book off a shelf he’s leaning against.

“Sorry,” he mumbles, ducking to pick it up. “Haven’t read this one,” he says, waving the cover at Will. “Erm…looks good.”

Damia snorts, and I start to wonder if I should’ve made the fae wait outside. They’re acting like they’ve never had a normal interaction in their lives. I ignore their awkward expressions and dive straight in.

“If you heard about what happened in Elmere, then you probably heard what my aunt, Lady Oclanna, has been saying about me.”

“Yes,” Will says slowly. “I have. Some tripe about you murdering your parents.”

“My parents, the king and queen,” I say pointedly.

Will’s face falls. “I’m sorry I couldn’t tell you.

They would’ve kicked me out of that manor the moment I did.

And you were so alone all the way out there—except for you and your family, of course, Miss Holms,” Will nods at Tira.

“But I figured it was better that I stick around and try to teach you what I could.”

“But you still left,” Tira says from her spot on the floor. I’m glad she makes the accusation instead of me. “Everything went to shit for Ana after that,” she adds.

Will shakes his head. When he speaks, his voice is thick with remorse.

“I’d reached retirement age, and General Becane was putting pressure on me to leave.

He said it was time I gave myself a break.

You were nearly of age. I thought they’d tell you when you turned twenty-one and let you move to the capital. ”

“You thought they’d let me out in the world, even though I was a solari?” I ask, my voice cool.

His eyes widen a fraction, and that tells me all I need to know.

“They didn’t tell you?” I ask.

He sighs, looking tired. “No, they didn’t tell me, but it was one of my theories.

Etusca was always cagey about your illness, and I thought perhaps…

” He shrugs. “Whatever the reason, I thought what they were doing to you was wrong. Who gives a shit what nonsense the Temple spouts about the gods and their magic?”

I smile. Will has a soldier’s love of coarse language, but he always tried to curb it around me. Obviously, now he’s no longer my guard, he’s less concerned about setting a good example.

“Good to know where you stand,” I say.