Page 38 of Forever My Siren Luna (The Hidden Cove #2)

Jack

Stupid, stupid, stupid. I can’t believe I acted so stupid.

Beretta was right.

I didn’t want to admit it. I didn’t want to see the proof of it. There is no denying it now. Not after I behaved so badly.

My Ela isn’t my Ela at all. She is his. She was the one I angered. Not the alpha who has far more composure than the rumors suggested. She was the one who got angry at me.

When she growled at me, I felt my heart shrinking inside my chest. The cold sweat that broke out on my skin had me itching for a drink.

I wanted one, but that young lad had already pointed out to Ela before lunch while they were on the beach that I had been wetting my lips more than I should have this morning.

I couldn’t take out my flask. Not in front of her.

Not while she was defending the man that was proving to be my greatest adversary at every turn.

I thought her mate, her husband, would be a lesser man than me. I had hoped it was so.

It seems I was wrong. So wrong. Just as wrong as I had been today in my thinking that I might create more of a rift between them. That may be a lost cause for me now. They seemed united in just 2 short days.

“Another!” I lifted my glass, yelling at the bar maid.

I watch as the voluptuous woman takes an entire bottle of cheap rum off the shelf behind her and walks it to my table, placing it in front of me with a heavy sigh.

“Thank you, lass,” I slurred, pouring myself another glass, making the amber liquid overflow a bit onto the table.

She just rolled her eyes with her hand on her hip before walking away to serve more drinks.

I guess she was tired of walking over every other minute to refill my glass. Such a smart lass.

Unlike me, the senseless one, who couldn’t even close my mouth until I had more than upset the woman whose heart I was trying to win.

I’m stupid. So, so stupid.

The swinging doors slammed open, and I flinched when Beretta marched in. The raven-haired beauty enters the bar, scanning the room until her eyes fall on me. Then she sighs in relief, her frenzied appearance suggesting she had been frantic before coming in.

She really is beautiful. I never fully appreciated her beauty before, knowing she was scared of her mate and wasn’t someone to fool around with.

She didn’t have the same opinion of me. She had no trouble slipping into my bed, something she has been trying to repeat since. It makes me nervous to even enter my cabin for anything. If I am alone, she finds me, and sinks her claws into me again.

My beast is humming in delight at the memories, but it just makes me wary. I was after her friend, but she took it upon herself to bed me anyway.

“ Bed you,” Oisin snickered. “ Like you are some virtuous dame she can usurp.”

“ I feel as if my virtue is in danger when she is around. I never imagined such a lithe woman could accost me so.”

“She is something,” Oisin purred, taking her in through my eyes.

Horny beast.

I looked around frantically for an escape as Beretta took long strides towards me.

It is futile. She isn't one to let her prey escape. I used to admire that about her. Now, it terrifies me.

“There you are, Captain. Fucking hell, I have been searching everywhere for you.”

The chair across from me scraped against the ground as she twisted it around to straddle it backward. The action excited my beast even more, seeing the way her leather pants strained against her tight body. A body I now know in the most intimate of ways.

“Here I am,” I muttered, downing another shot. “I hardly need you to check up on me. I’m a man capable of returning to my ship when I’m ready.”

“That is not what was worrying me.” The look in her eyes tells me that she was referring to what happened earlier. She heard about my lunch at the packhouse. Little Joe must have made it back to the ship.

“I’m fine,” I snapped, pouring myself another drink.

Before I can lift it to my lips, she takes my glass and throws the shot of rum back into her mouth herself, taking the bottle from me and pouring herself another.

My hand remains lifted, now empty of the only thing I know that helps to dull the pain of failure that always plagues me.

"That was mine," I growled.

"Well, pirates code. I wanted it. I took it. It is mine now."

"I think you are taking those words I spoke a little too seriously." I huffed, feeling down again at my failures. "We can't always just take what we want."

Her lips curled in aversion.

“Annoying,” she muttered, “You are acting pathetic.”

“What?” I snarled, bristling at the insult. It stabs through me harsher than expected.

“You heard me,” she snapped. “You are acting pathetic. Not befitting of the captain of the greatest band of pirates the seas have ever seen. You are acting like a pathetic pup. If it hurts you to this point, confess to her. Get it out of the fucking way so we can all move on with our lives. Your inability to take any meaningful action is hurting not just you, you know.”

She takes one more drink, her eyes staying trained on the ceiling for a long moment when she is through. It pangs me to see the war going on in her eyes. Is she referring to herself, or others? I didn’t want to punish anyone but myself.

“Tell her how you feel, captain. This is going to be a festering sore for us both until you do. Be a man. Show some fucking courage. Take initiative on the matter for once. Be the fucking man that I fell in love with.”

My breath catches in my throat. I thought it might just be lust on her part. I was hoping it was, but also dreading it. Hearing her say that word made something crumble inside of me.

Love.

It’s something so scary coming from her lips. It sounded more like a threat than a confession. I didn’t know how to respond or react.

Her eyes moved down, piercing into me. She’s looking right into my soul, and the fire is brimming inside of her at whatever she sees.

“Since you are a capable man, I’ll leave you to sulk like a pathetic pup for the night.

Tomorrow, get your shit together. You have ships to command and a sea to conquer.

The you I am seeing right now can’t even conquer his own feelings.

No one wants to follow a captain wallowing in self-deprivation. Fix yourself.”

She slid the glass back over to me, but took the bottle. Then I watch as she lifts her leg over the chair and turns to leave without another glance in my direction.

“ You’ve done it now,” Oisin groaned, still admiring her as she walked away and out of the bar.

“ That I have,” I sighed, signaling the miffed bar maid for another bottle.

Beretta's words stabbed to the heart of me. I feel pathetic. I feel like a lost pup.

She’s right. I need to fix myself. I need to quit wading in the lukewarm waters, neither on land nor in the sea. I need to dive in or retreat.

~

Elelira

“ Mmmh, this feels good,” Val purrs, enjoying the feel of the brush running through my hair. “ I missed this.”

“Me too,” I told her, being honest for once.

I missed all of this. I missed my nightly routine with Killian and Lachlan.

The past several nights have been the same familiar routine. Dinner with Lachlan in the garden, followed by our nightly hair brushing with our Lycans in control.

So much has changed during these days. If I am not spending time with my father, getting to know him better, I am with the warriors and pirates, helping in the training so our forces can be more in sync and familiar with one another.

Beretta has been helping a lot with that as well.

Jack shows up to train a lot with his men too, but he has mainly taken to overseeing the navy and building our cooperation on the waters.

I'm grateful.

Ever since that awkward lunch I have become more wary of Jack.

I try not to be alone with him or around him without Lachlan present.

When Lachlan is with me, Jack has taken to avoiding the both of us all together.

Even though I have Cherum and Cedric following me around again when I am not with my mate, I still rather not interact with Jack without my mate, just out of courtesy to him.

I felt a little guilty for treating Jack with such caution, but Beretta told me I was doing the right thing.

She pointed out that if I tried to be considerate to both of them, it would be an insult to them both instead.

I needed to choose who my loyalty was to, and she agreed that it needed to be with Lachlan.

She wasn’t surprised at all when I told her about what Cedric told me and then what happened at lunch.

She just seemed annoyed with Jack.

I will need to talk to Jack eventually, but I’m not sure how to navigate that just yet.

Right now, my focus is on getting ready to take out my Uncle and his vile warriors, and in the evenings my focus is solely on Lachlan, allowing both of us to repair the many hurts and brokenness from before.

Tonight was no different than the past several nights.

Dinner was great, with great conversation. Now that everything's out in the open, there was a freedom I felt to be completely honest about everything. I didn’t hold back my thoughts and feelings like I did in the past.

Now, we are back in my room, what used to be our room, and Lachlan has given Killian full control, as I have Val.

The two are purring and basking in each other’s presence.

It’s sweet seeing Val like this again after being so defensive and safeguarded for so long. She is like a love-sick puppy again.

Lachlan and I have gotten so much closer too. So close that I even started to regret watching him leave at the end of each visit to go back to the new suite he had built for us in the newest wing of the castle.

“ You could always ask him to stay?” Val tells me, reading my thoughts and sounding a bit too eager about the suggestion.

“ I could, but I still think that it’s too soon for that.”

“Is it?” Val mused. “ I think it’s the perfect time.”

“And why is that?”