Page 10 of Forever My Siren Luna (The Hidden Cove #2)

“I don’t need you to keep me safe,” I whispered.

“I needed you to talk to me. To listen to me.” My eyes are burning, hot tears streaming down my face.

“I tried to tell you. Countless times, I tried to meet with you to tell you why you couldn’t feel the mate bond, and that I was your mate.

You wouldn’t even see me. You sent me away, then would fuck one of your Leonas , making me bare that pain. ”

Someone gasped, and I hope Percy doesn't find offense with me saying this.

I know Yasmin was often one of those women in my first life, but I also know she would never do that now in this life, especially with Percy as a mate now.

That was one of the reasons I thought this was an alternate timeline or another world mirroring the one I died in.

So much did change, but I was still married to the same person in the end. ...

“I didn’t know,” his voice cracked, tears running from the corners of his own eyes. “Seeing you when I didn't know made resisting you even harder.”

“THEN YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE RESISTED!” I screamed. “IT HURT, LACHLAN!” I cried out. “You have no idea how badly it hurts to constantly feel you with other women. To have to constantly live with the pains of your mate betraying you!”

“Yes, I do,” he says flatly, his tears dripping from his squared, stubble-covered jaw.

“What?” I was never with anyone. The entire two years that we lived together in my first life, I never even talked to a man, in fear of Lachlan's fury and degrading comments if I did.

Only when I absolutely had to, like when I would beg to see Lachlan.

And not once in my second life did I have any sort of intimacy with another man.

Did he have another mate somehow? He can not be referring to me.

“I never accepted your rejection, Lira. I felt it. Up until your death, I felt you with another man. I was never going to bring it up, but I do know what betrayal feels like. I felt it until I felt your death.”

I'm momentarily mortified, but Val is snarling in my head, knowing exactly what betrayal he is referring to.

It was not a betrayal. Far from it.

“My uncle caught me before my death,” I tell him, no longer caring if this news hurts him, my reputation, or anything else. He had just announced to everyone that in our first life, I had maybe betrayed him.

No. I didn't.

I won’t have him categorize what happened to me as a betrayal. He knows nothing. “You never felt betrayal, you arrogant prick.”

His brow furrows before realization hits him and his eyes widen with anger. Cherum is growling, as well as Percy, knowing what I’m insinuating.

“Weeks. I bet it was weeks of pain you felt. Or maybe it was only a couple days. It felt like years to me at the time. A lifetime’s worth of suffering in what was probably just a short amount of time.

” I turned to look at Cedric. “You said my father was trying to figure out what killed me? I used the last of my magic to take my own life. I killed myself, so I wouldn’t have to suffer the endless rape and torture from my uncle’s men any longer. ”

I turned my glare back to Lachlan, who looked horrified, all the color drained from his face.

“You didn’t feel my betrayal. You felt my suffering, only probably a milder version of it.

I’m sure your jaw and bones didn’t break, and you never bled from the pain.

You weren't bound and tied down while countless men used you. You felt something I had no choice in. I suffered from your choices you made for two years. We are not the same.”

I don't realize I am shaking with fury until Jack’s hand rests firmly on my shoulder.

I blinked rapidly, looking away from Lachlan and up towards the sky, feeling everything I didn’t want to feel all over again.

All the memories of that time are refreshed, thanks to this man’s naive claim that he suffered similarly to me.

He may have fought to bring me back from the dead, but that doesn’t simply take away all the other hurt he gave me. Val is pressing against the surface, wanting free. She learned her own way to work off her anger, and she is on the brink of taking over right now.

No one muttered a sound, not a single word, making my confession, the shame of it, press heavy on my shoulders.

They wanted to know why I would suffer panic attacks; why I would shrink up and cower in certain situations.

Now they know, and I can almost guarantee they all wish they hadn’t learned the truth now.

Percy may be the only man here that can maybe understand what that time before my death meant for me, but only because his mate suffered something similar.

None of these other men have any right to judge me. None of them.

I grew stronger from the past. I am no longer that scared little girl that will just suffer at the hands of men. I have the strength to fight back. I didn't need their pity, even Jack’s, which I feel coming off him in waves. I shook off his hand, not wanting his brotherly strength right now.

Screw this. Val needs to blow off her steam, and I think I’ll take Beretta and find a way to blow off some aggression myself afterward.

I’m not the weak, cowering little girl they are expecting me to be.

I feel like all of them are ready for me to have a panic attack similar to the ones I had in the past.

Not this time.

I don’t need any of them to watch me to make sure nothing bad happens to me again. I got through some of the worst things imaginable on my own. How dare any of these men think they can take pity on me now.

“I don’t need your protection, Lachlan. I am not as weak as you make me out to be.”

"Lira," he whispers that damned nickname I once hated, then grew to love. Now, I hate it all over again. I hate that he thinks I'm weak, and I hate that he is the reason everyone is taking pity on me now. I hate all this.

Most of all, I hate that, despite everything, I still crave his touch now that I'm back here again. I hate that he is the reason I am feeling all these conflicting, painful emotions, but I know that one touch, one embrace from him would chase everything away.

I hate that deep down, I know I still love him, which makes all this hurt even more.

I refused to look at him again. I don’t want that damned mate bond to take away any more of my anger right now. If he wants to feel pity for me, fine, but I refuse to feel any for him. I refuse to give into the bond any more today. I refuse to let myself be swayed, even the tiniest bit.

"I'm not weak. I was never weak, and I need no one's pity."

With that, I’m done. I can't stomach this a moment longer. I walk towards the ship, letting Val take over. She rips out of my clothes, and I can hear many audible gasps behind me.

No one here has seen my Lycan before. I know she is a sight to behold. Val is ferocious and gloriously intimidating, as an Alpha Lycan should be. She proudly leaped for the deck of the ship, the crew that were watching hurrying to get out of her way, knowing she is on the war-path.

Beretta is the only one standing in the way with a smirk on her face. “Need some company?” She asks.

Val nods with a wicked smirk, knowing Beretta will make this all the more fun.

“I’ll get us a change of clothes. Meet you at the boats in 5 minutes. Figure out where we can go to let loose in the meantime. The more open and less populated, the better.”

As she walks off, Val paces the deck, scanning the areas without inhabitants along the shore that will be easy to travel to by row boat. Val isn’t ready to give me back control, so I don’t think we should go far, but we will be loud. Sparring and fighting is never quiet.

While scanning, I risked a look down at the dock where the men are still talking, Lachlan and Jack in each other’s space.

I can’t hear their conversation, but by my guess, it looks tense.

After my last revelation, what did I expect?

Jack is probably acting like an overprotective big brother, and Lachlan like the arrogant prick as usual.

Lachlan glances up at me, and when his eyes meet Val's, those conflicting emotions return, causing Val to look away.

“ This is hard,” she mutters to me, “ Much harder than I expected.”

“We aren’t here for him,” I told her for the millionth time. “ Think of Cherum, and Yasmin, Percy, and little Wesley.”

I wanted to mention others, like Cedric, and his mate, who mostly stood back and stayed quiet through this whole ordeal, but my mind is still a mess.

I needed time to make sense of everything that has been said.

I feel like we have been lied to and manipulated for so long, we need to separate ourselves from the situation before it gets any worse.

Things might be clearing up now, but compartmentalizing all the past pains and reevaluating will take some time.

I don't need pity or more confusion. I need someone unbiased like Beretta to help me see things more clearly after Val lets off her tension as she needs to.

I wish I could see Yasmin again, but that will have to wait for another time.

Yasmin and Beretta would get along greatly.

They are similar in many ways, which is probably why Beretta quickly became one of my closest friends.

“Ready to go?” Beretta returns a few moments later, a rucksack on her back.

Val nods, moving to the other side of the ship where Joe is readying a boat for us.

“Can I come?” he asks, his eyes shining bright with expectancy.

“Not today, Joe. We will likely be visiting the taverns after the princess, ” she says the word mockingly while giving me a playful smirk, “let’s off some steam.”

“I’m of drinking age, now,” he puffs out his chest, trying to appear bigger than he is, making even Val huff out a laugh.

“That may be, but not tonight. We need some girl talk. Next time, kid,” Beretta ruffles his hair as he scoffs, pushing her away with a disappointed frown.