Page 28 of Forever My Siren Luna (The Hidden Cove #2)

~Later that evening~

Everyone was gathered in the great hall, preparing for a run that we often do on full moons. Ever since the last battle with the north, this has been our pack's way of celebrating the victory.

Tonight, we will be celebrating our freedom from the Western Realm’s Alpha as well. He will no longer have any foothold in our pack. We know how strong we are. Though Alpha Wayne did help us in our time of need, I do believe we could have been fine on our own. We can survive without his help now.

I looked at the clock impatiently, wondering if Lira had left yet.

“You should have been more kind to her,” Killian nags me again, “She is leaving this place. You could have parted with kinder words.”

“There was never anything kind about this arrangement,” I reminded him. “It was forced on us.”

“Still,” Killian grumbled. “She was crying. You didn’t even ask her what was wrong.”

“You’re right,” I muttered, “She doesn’t want my concern. She doesn’t want anything from me.” It makes me angry how little she wants of me now. I am still battling with my desire for her daily, but she doesn't show me the least bit of concern.

“That’s why you were unkind? Because she stopped wanting you?”

“Because I couldn’t trust her!” I practically yelled at him. “You know as well as I do how her uncle is. Her behavior never made sense. I could let myself be a victim to Alpha Wayne.”

Killian grumbled, restless because of the full moon. Or maybe it’s something else. I feel this undercurrent of anxiety with him.

His anxiety made me angry. Is this a last ditch effort from her to bewitch my Lycan? Can she not just leave in peace? Was she meeting her uncle’s men in the woods next to the creek yesterday to acquire a spell in a last-ditch effort to bewitch me?

Nilo started to talk to me about the details of the run, having spotted deer earlier and wanting to hunt while in beast form to donate the meat to the orphanage along the beach. Venison steaks would be a treat for the growing Lycan pups.

He stopped talking as I tried to focus on the details of the map, then when I looked up at his face, he nodded, indicating for me to turn around.

There she is, looking every bit the temptress I knew she was. She is wearing nothing more than a slip, even her beautiful feet are bare against the marble floor.

“What the hell are you wearing, Lira?” I asked, hating that she was dressed like that for so many eyes to see.

She lifted her chin, revealing more of her creamy neck. There was a fire in her jewel-like eyes I had never seen there before.

“Here,” she thrusted the papers at me, the ones I brought to her this morning. “It is signed. We are no longer married, though I can’t say the last two years were really a marriage at all.”

I narrowed my eyes on her. Is she trying to make a scene in her final moments here? “You don’t look ready to leave. I thought I made myself clear, Elelira. You are to-”

“One last thing before I go,” she interrupted me, taking me by surprise.

I was about to ask what the hell she was up to, but then, all of a sudden, this brilliant glow engulfed her, making her hair lift and twirl around her body, like she was in her own cyclone of brilliant light.

Magic. This is magic, and it is coming from her. It is flowing down her limbs, radiating out of her finger-tips and her toes, making her eyes shine so brightly that I have to look away.

When it stopped, her scent hit me, and my eyes flew open again and the realization of who she is brought me to my knees.

“You, Elelira, you...you are….”

“I was your mate, the mate you claimed to be looking for all along, but were too arrogant to notice. I tried telling you countless times, but you dismissed me, abused me, forced me to endure as you brought countless women to your bed.” Every word out of her mouth sends a stabbing pain through my heart.

Killian was frantic inside me, trying to tear me apart from the inside to get to her.

He feels it, and I do too. I know what she is about to do before the words leave her. I am powerless to stop it as they come pouring out of her mouth.

She took a step back, squaring her beautiful thin shoulders, staring down on me with the arrogance I deserve.

“I, Elelira Meline Lambert, reject you, Lachlan Stiles, as my mate, and as my alpha.”

The pain that stabbed through me is like nothing I have felt before. “No,” I gasped, clutching at my chest, falling forward from the pain.

I can feel it. All of it. I can feel all the pain and neglect in the bond, and I can feel how much I damaged it unknowingly over the past two years.

Why didn’t she tell me?! I thought she was full Lycan.

I didn’t know she had fae blood in her. Why?

Why did it have to come to this? I always wanted her, and if I had only known that it wasn’t a trick or a scheme, but the repressed bond concealed by her sealed magic, I would never have hurt her. I never would have….

Fuck. I ruined this. I ruined everything. I always wanted her, and I hated us both for it. Now, I only have myself to hate.

I try to collect myself. I needed to fix this. I need to beg her to stay. I can’t let her go. Not like this. Not after everything I put her through.

She felt the bond all this time? Shit. All those women as I was trying to repress my desire for her. Did she feel it all?

I’m a monster. A fucking monster. Killian is shattered and tearing himself apart, unable to stand the pain this knowledge and the rejection brings.

When I heard her mutter a goodbye, I forced myself to try and get up off the floor. I can’t let her go.

She turned to look at the room one last time, her usual frosty exterior softening as she stared at the other pack members watching the scene in horror.

“I, Elelira Meline Lambert, reject Hidden Cove Pack, as a member,” she breathed deeply, closing her eyes, “and as it’s Luna.”

The pain made me fall to my knees again, and I know I’m not the only one. Every adult in the pack would have felt their true fated Luna rejecting them, and it’s all my fault. I not only hurt the one person I was fated to always love and protect, I hurt my pack.

Her slip of a gown falls to the floor, and I can barely see her naked body as she leaves through the doors to outside through all my tears.

I have to stop her. I can’t let her go like this. Where is she going like that? With nothing on, it’s not safe. She should stay here. If she doesn’t want me, fine, I will suffer but try to cope, but she can’t leave. Not like that.

“Siren,” Killian whimpered brokenly.

It takes me a second to register what he means.

She isn’t just of fae blood. She is part siren.

And she now has her magic. She can now gain her fins.

She’s escaping to the sea.

I bolted up somehow, racing outside to chase her, but I’m too late. All I catch is one last glimpse of her as she disappears into the sea.

~~~

“That was when I started searching for you,” I told Lira now. “I sent countless ships out, but we never found a trace of where you could be. When I felt you die, I was….”

I looked away, pressing my lips together. How do I tell her this part? I promised her I would tell her everything, but this is one detail I want to leave out.

“You were what?” Lira prompted with a brooding expression.

I have to tell her. I promised. “I set sail. I was….I was going to give the pack to Nilo and take my own life. I couldn’t live in a world without you, knowing I could never right the wrongs I had done.

I didn’t want you to forgive me, but I wanted the opportunity to spend the rest of my life making all my mistakes up to you in whatever way I could.

I thought my mistrust and abuse is what led to your death.

If I never had a way to atone for those sins against you, I just wanted to take my own life and beg for your forgiveness in the afterlife.

I was going to kill myself in the last place I knew you were. The sea.”

She stared at me for a moment, her emerald eyes glistening with unshed tears. “You didn’t, though, right? You couldn't have.”

I quickly shook my head. “Your father discovered me in his search for you. He felt your death too. That was when he asked me to help bring you back.”

She stared at the ground, playing with her pretty fingers, my eyes focusing on the one that is missing our wedding band. I know she left it behind. It’s in a box, safe in our old room. I shamelessly hope to someday give her a proper wedding and to put the ring back on her finger.

Even without feeling the bond, I know without a doubt that I love her and I always will. Even if she can’t forgive me, I will still love her. Always.

“Would you still have felt bad if you never found out if I was your mate?” Lira asked. “If I had run away before then?”

I smiled softly. “Yes. I would have searched for you no matter what, bond or not. I thought about that a lot after you left me this time. I already felt horrible, but I tried to justify it thinking you were sent to hurt me and my pack. Once I realized you were never the enemy, I know I would have reacted the same, even without the bond.”

“What if I decide to reject you now?”

I closed my eyes, not wanting to even imagine going through her rejection again. Killian was whimpering at the thought,

“I won't accept it, but I won’t blame you either. I will just follow you for the rest of my life, showing you with every breath that I’m sorry.”

“Would you leave your pack to follow me?”

I huffed a laugh without humor. “I would give up everything for you. Everything, Lira. I know that you are the one thing I can never live without.” Especially now. She is my only reason for living. I love her, and I always will.

~

Elelira

The mate bond tingles and throbs in my chest as his words sink in.

Even if I hated him, or tried to hate him, I never wanted him to abandon his pack or his life. As terrible as he was to me, he was still an amazing alpha to his pack.