Page 44 of Flameborne: Fury (Emberquell Academy #2)
~ DONAVYN ~
Everything in me recoiled.
With a hiss I yanked her hand from my chest and stumbled back, holding her at arm’s length as I spoke through a clenched jaw.
“Diaan—stop, and listen,” I hissed, letting her see the anger and fear in my eyes. “You know I have no wish to hurt you, or disrespect. But this cannot be.”
“Alexi doesn’t care if—”
“It has nothing to do with the King!” I barked and she drew up short, eyes widening as she heard the ring of true anger in my voice.
Muttering a curse, I tried to find the right words. I needed space, but I was trapped because I didn’t want to back into my bedchamber and give her opportunity to step inside and misread it , but stuck because I didn’t want to touch her either, and she stood blocking the door.
“Please, Diaan, don’t interrupt me. I’ll need to explain.”
She blinked again, but nodded, and when I released her wrist she took her hand back, clasping her hands at her waist and waiting as I’d asked her to.
Fuck. Fuck. Please, forgive me, Bren…
“I told you that Kgosi took Akhane as a mate.”
Diaan nodded, a small pucker appearing between her brows. “I understand that gives you a reason to bring the girl with you and even though I don’t like it, I understand that it would be too much to ask you to remain alone. I can accept that you must have your—”
“Do not finish that sentence,” I snarled.
To my relief, when Diaan met my eyes she drew back half a step at the sheer rage she found there.
Determined not to give her another moment to divert me, I continued, speaking through my teeth. “That was not a simple tale to suit my needs, Diaan. My dragon chose a mate and bonded Akhane. And that has brought Bren and I closer. Far closer. We, too, are bonded. In truth. Mates. Like the dragons.”
Diaan’s brow furrowed. She blinked rapidly. “Donavyn, you don’t have to make up excuses. I told you I came as a woman, not as a ruler. You won’t be affected—”
“I am speaking to you as I would to any woman who approached me,” I growled.
“I am flattered and humbled by your interest, but I am bonded. I am given—heart, mind, and body. Bren is my mate. She is the only woman for me. And while I recognize the potential issue that could cause to my career, I won’t retreat from it.
She is mine, and I’m hers. Your words are a gift.
I don’t take them lightly. But I cannot—will not—pursue any other woman. Ever.”
Diaan’s brows pinched over her nose. “You’ve always told us that when dragons bond their mate’s riders are simple allies—”
“And I knew that to be true. But not for me. I don’t know if it’s because she’s a woman, or because my dragon is the Primarch. Perhaps both. But Bren and I are bonded as surely as the dragons. Hear me, Diaan: It hurts me to be apart from her. She fills my thoughts, even now.”
She blinked again and her cheeks heated, turning red and splotchy.
Then her eyes narrowed. “Is that what this has all been about? Why you were so supportive of a woman Furyknight, because you wanted to fuck her? I should have known—all this righteous determination on her behalf, you’re all the fucking same—”
“ No!” I snapped, then had to gather myself when she flinched.
I raised my hands to reassure her, but didn’t touch her.
“I didn’t even know about the dragons until two days ago.
We were attracted, but I’ve avoided her so as not to breach my vows.
I am very aware of the complications this union presents.
But when we found them out there and the dragons united…
” I left the rest unsaid. Diaan was a woman of the world with enough understanding that I didn’t need to say what had resulted from that.
I watched understanding dawn on her face—and the rush of pride and anger in its wake. “You can’t seriously expect me to believe that you, a man of such experience and status would be happy with—”
“I have never been happier, Diaan.”
“Yet you hide the connection?”
I scowled. “She asked me to do so because she fears others making assumptions about her if they learn we’re involved. I’m sure you can understand that?”
Her head twitched back and her jaw jutted forward, but her fingers tightened at her waist, her knuckles turning white with the pressure.
“Yes,” she admitted reluctantly. “I can understand that. But, Donavyn, surely you must see that someone of my age and experience could give you so much more—”
“I have everything I need. Everything.” I hated slapping her in the face with words. But she was persistent and powerful. I knew she wouldn’t hear a boundary if there was so much as a hairsbreadth of opportunity left. “She is mine, and I’m hers, Diaan. I’m sorry. I pray you and Alexi can find—”
“Reject me if you will, Donavyn. But don’t insult me with pity.”
I clenched my jaw. “I hold no pity for you. Only a genuine desire not to harm you, Your Majesty.”
She flinched like I’d hit her.
Diaan tore her eyes from mine and stared out the window, her jaw flexing, throat bobbing. I couldn’t tell if she fought tears, or anger. But I knew that despite her arrogance, she wasn’t an evil person. I had to give her something to help her look back on this with some sense of assurance.
“Diaan,” I said, softening my tone to plead with her.
“I know you understand how much more difficult this world is for a woman in power or leadership. Bren begged me to let her prove herself. She wants to be measured on what she can do, not who she’s bonded to.
I’m trying to respect her wishes and keep our bond secret for now.
That’s the only reason I didn’t tell you both the moment I arrived.
Because it didn’t change our purpose or skills, individually, or together.
But I told her that you and Alexi had to be the first to know.
And I was willing to speak with you as soon as we returned. Do you believe me?”
Her lips were thin and pale, pressed together hard. But she nodded tightly. “I know you’re a man of your word, Donavyn. I believe you.”
“Then I have to ask: will you tell the King?”
Her brows shot up in genuine surprise. “You’d continue to withhold this from Alexi?”
“Only for a time. Only while she proves herself. You saw how he was at the beginning. He’s barely come to consider that she has merit of her own. Even now he sees little more than a tool.”
“Or a whore,” she added cynically.
I shot her a glare. But she only rolled her eyes. Despite being a foot taller than her, she managed to stare at me down her nose. “Don’t turn cold on me now, Donavyn. We both know I speak the truth—Alexi is brilliant, but he sees all women as mother, or whore. Trust me.”
She drew herself up, raised her chin, rolled her shoulders back, and suddenly I once again stood before a Queen, rather than a simple woman. I was half-concerned and half-relieved as I watched her sovereign dignity return.
I wanted to wince at her words, but couldn’t afford to offer compassion. “Then you understand my hesitation on Bren’s behalf?”
She gave me a look like I wasn’t playing fair, but then she nodded. “I do. And in light of that, I won’t share her secret unless she proves unworthy of the trust.” She tipped her head and gave me a measuring gaze. “Is she worthy of the trust, Donavyn?”
“Do you think I’d withhold this from Alexi if she wasn’t? I only agreed to it for her benefit because I’m confident she’ll prove her worth and in the wake of that, the declaration will change nothing.”
Diaan’s lips thinned. “Delay as little as possible. Alexi trusts and respects you, but he doesn’t take kindly to being kept in the dark, no matter the consequences. And his retribution, if he finds out to his detriment, will be swift and powerful. Are you sure you’re willing to risk that for her?”
I was offended by the disbelief in her tone. “Of course!” I growled.
Her expression was truly confused and surprised. “But, why?”
It was my turn to be stunned. But I was suddenly reminded of Bren asking me the exact question while we traveled and it ignited a rage that mingled with grief that everyone—including Bren herself—so easily believed she wasn’t worth any of this.
Luckily, the answer for Diaan was precisely the same as I’d given Bren when she asked.
“Because she’s mine.”
Diaan stiffened. She didn’t like that answer at all.