Page 30 of Fast Break

Thirty

Palmer

I don't sleep well after I leaveCharlie's.

Something happened between us that was both monumental and not good.

He was genuinelyhurtI didn't want him to come with me, and when I think about what I'd said, I realize how callous I'd come across.

I'd all but told him hewasn'tgood enough to be myboyfriend.

It's not true. I would be proud to callCharliemine, despite what my parents might say, if I thought he felt the same.

And my judgment is so off, I can't risk believing he might without proof.

By the time my alarm goes off, I've managed to capture a few hours of sleep. I shower, takecarewith my hair and makeup, and put on the daisy-patterned vintage swing dress I'd thrifted during a shopping excursion withTisha.

"Ugh."I check the clock. If I don't leave in the next five minutes, I'll be late, and I'll never hear the end of it.

I sling my little purse across mychest, grab my phone, andstartfor the door when I remember I forgot to put on the largepinkdaisy earrings I'd found to go with my dress.

I set everything down,runto the bedroom to find them, then gather it all up and rush to the car.

Traffic is thankfully light heading west and I make it to my parents in just under an hour.

Pretty sure I'll have a ticket in the mailthanksto the new speed camera they put up just past Exit 80, but it's a small price to pay to not face my mother's censure ontopof everything else happening today.

I park in the side driveway as usual and make my way through the back door. I'm greeted with a bear hug from Helen."Sweet girl,"Helen says, pulling away."You shouldn't be here. I don't know what your mother is thinking."

Tears suddenly spring to my eyes, and I'm grateful there is one person on my side here."You know how she is."

"I do, which is why I told her she could fire me if shewants, but I will not be catering this engagement lunch."

My eyes widen."What did she say?"

Helen picks up a rag and returns to wiping the counter."I'm still here and there's a catering company setting up a big tent outside."

"Could've ordered pizzas and been done with it,"Ilaugh.

"I did suggest getting a sub platter from Wegman's, which I still think is more than those people deserve."

I wrap my arms around Helen's waist and give her another squeeze."Thanks, Helen."

She pats my arm."Don't let the bastards get you down."

A genuinelaughbubbles out. Maybe I will survive this all.

I don't see my mother or father anywhere, so I use this temporary moment of peace to gather my wits about me.

I steal into the family room and have a seat, reaching for my phone and coming up empty.

Shit. I think I left it on my kitchen counter when I went back to retrieve the earrings. Guess I won't be able to call for help.

My reprieve is short-lived. Mom pokes her head in the room, then seeing me, comes in and shuts the pocket door behind her.

"I didn't realize you'd already arrived. You can't hide out all day,Palmer."

"I was merely gathering my energy before the hordes descend."

"Do you think, for today, you could brush the chip off your shoulder? I don't expect you to do it forRaniaorBrennan, but I'd appreciate it if you'd do it for me."

She purses her lips, painted a subtle shade of coral that matches the short-sleeved sweater set she wears."I'm not happy withRania, but she's my only niece, and family must forgive family."

I've heard some version of that my whole life, and I am sick of it."Even when family stabs you in the back the way she did?"

"I understand your anger and I agree it's justified,"she says. She perches on the edge of the sofa cushion next to me.

"Then why are you doing this? Why throw them an engagementpartyand make me come for it?"

"It's the right thing to do toshoweveryone there are no hard feelings."

Mylaughis more of a cackle, but I can't help myself."Oh, but there are hard feelings."

"But we don't have toshowthem?—"

"Why not?"Istand, a fire catching in mystomach."Nowadays, this wouldn't even rate a comment on Facebook."

"It's about appearances. You have no idea what it's like to be the subject of gossip and mockery. I do. I need you to do your part."

"This isn't healthy, Mom, and I can't keep doing this."I breathe in through my nose and exhale a resigned breath."This one last time, I'llshowmy face, slap on a smile, and go through the motions. But do not expect me at the wedding, Mom. I mean it."

"I suppose that's fair."

“And you and Dad need to start coming to my games.” I hold up a hand to stop whatever she’s about to say.

“You’re all about appearances. Well, how do you think it looks when one of your clients knows more about your daughter and her career than you do?

You don’t have to approve of what I do. But I’d appreciate some support.

Just like I’m showing my support for you today. ”

“All right. You make a good point.” She stands, hergazeslipping down my dress until she zeroes in on my tattoo peeking out from under the hem."Is that... a tattoo?"

I put my arm around hershouldersand guide her out of the room."You can yell at me later, Mom. Appearances, remember?"

Workers set up a large whitepartytent in the back, where the guests will sit.

Tables and chairs are being moved inside, while my parents' gardeners unload apickup truck full of flowers.

The kitchen has been taken over by servers arranging finger sandwiches and hors d'oeuvres on serving platters, and Helen is nowhere to be seen. I don't blame her.

When the valets arrive, I offer to help them set up along the drive, recalling how my mother has done it in the past. I finish giving directions and making sure they have shade and water, andstartback to the house.

I'm thinking aboutCharlieand wondering if I should try to call him from the house phone.

I need to hear his voice. I don't like how things went last night, and it's all my fault.

I'm lost in my thoughts, so I don't see the happy couple until I nearly bump into them.

"Palmer."My name on Rania'stongueis cloying. She opens her arms, but I step back, forcing her todropthem. She loops an arm through Brennan's and the two of them smile at me like idiots.

"Rania. Dickhead,"I greet them.

Brennangivesme a pitying look."Really? Name-calling? It's beneath you,Palmer."

"Actually, you're beneath me,"I retort.

Ranialooks me up and down, and I return the gesture.

She's picture perfect; my mother will be pleased.

Her platinum hair falls around her face in a cascade of curls.

Her big blue eyes, a lighter shade thanmine, glitter with contempt.

She wears a light blue satiny, sleeveless sheath that falls to her knees, and a pair of beaded Prada slingbacks.

I draw myself to my full height, determined not to let her make me feel insecure.

"Nice hair,"Raniasays with false sincerity."Suits you."

"Thanks, I think so, too."I'm not taking the bait.

As I stare at the two of them together, I feel nothing but a nagging sense of regret I ever wasted my time with thisass.

I can't believe I ever thought being withCharliewould make me look desperate to these people.

He's one-thousand times the manBrennanis and I'm an idiot for keeping him away.

"Well, the guests willstartarriving soon,"I say."I'm sure you'll want to finish getting ready."

Raniatouches her hair with a frown."We are ready."

"Oh. Okay, then."I flash a fake smile andwalkpast them to the house. I steal a look over my shoulder, whereRaniahas opened a compact and is inspecting herself, whileBrennanmurmurs reassurances. I turn back before they catch me and snicker. Score one for the goalie.

I sit on the back deck with a mimosa I swiped from one of the catering trays, watching as guests trickle in.RaniaandBrennanare somewhere in the house waiting for the cue for their big entrance.

The sliding door opens behind me and I'm pleasantly surprised it'sBoone,wearinga tan summer-weight sport coat over a light green open-necked dress shirt."There you are,"he says.

I raise my glass."Getting a headstart."

"Me, too."Heholdsup a similar glass."There's an entire tray back there. Should I grab it?"

Ilaugh."I think we'll get more in the tent."

"Speaking of,"he says, holding out his free hand."Your mother asked me to find you and escort you to your seat."

I roll my eyes, but take his hand and let him help me up."I guess it's time."

"How are you holding up?"His eyesholdcompassion, and I'm grateful, even though a big part of me wishesCharliewere here.

"Fine. It turns out, I'm not all that angry anymore. More annoyed."I had toldBooneabout thebreakup and Brennan's subsequent engagement."I'm looking forward to the mini crab cakes, but otherwise, I just want this over. Playoffs are this week and I'm already missing today'spractice."

We talk about the upcoming games as he escorts me to the tent. Before we enter to find our seats, he stops me andpullsa small box out of his pocket."I brought this for you. Saw it online and it made me think of you."

"You didn't have to,"I say. I open the box and find a red rope bracelet with a lacrossestickcharm holding two of the ends together."I love it!"

"The rope they used is what the string thestickheads with."He takes it out of the box and loosens the fastening. Istickout my hand and he slips it on, tightening it."I know you can't wear it during thegame, but I hope it'll bring you some luck."

"Thankyou. This is so thoughtful."I give him a hug andkisshim on the cheek.

"Maybe after theseasonis over and things aren't so crazy with the housing site, we can make some plans to see each other."

I bite mylipand look down at the bracelet."Maybe."

"Unless there's someone else?"heasks, a half smile on his lips.

I open my mouth, ready to protest, but all I can do is shrug."Maybe."

"Your friend,Charlie?"

I furrow my brow."How'd you guess?"

"That night I took you todinner, it was kind of obvious he was into you."

"Was it?"

"As obvious as it was you were into him."

I blush."It's complicated."

"It usually is,"Boonesighs.

I put my hand on Boone'schest."I'm sorry."

"Don't be,"he says, taking my hand and kissing my knuckles."He's a lucky man. But I do hope we can still be friends. You're my only lacrosse connection, and Iplanon hitting you up for tickets again."

Ilaugh."Deal."