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Chapter Fourteen

SESSION TRANSCRIPT #5 – Dylan Braun Treating therapist: Dr. Stuart Morley

Dr. Morley: You sure you don’t want a drink? Water or juice or something? Dylan: I’m sure. Dr. Morley: So, the first couple times I saw you, you’d just moved back. How have the last few days been? Dylan: Fine. Dr. Morley: First impressions of Sandy Haven? Thumbs up or thumbs down? Dylan: It’s fine. Dr. Morley: I don’t get out there much, but my wife loves it. The shops and restaurants and coffee shops and stuff. She goes there sometimes on weekends with her girlfriends… spends a fortune on hand cream and candles. Dylan: [no response] Dr. Morley: Pretty swanky town, for sure. Dylan: Yeah. Dr. Morley: And first few days of school under your belt. How did that go? Dylan: Fine. Dr. Morley: Aw, c’mon… you can do better than fine. I’m looking for a minimum two-sentence answer here. Dylan: It was loud. And it was long. Dr. Morley: Okay… Better than you thought? Worse? Same? Different? Dylan: Same. Dr. Morley: And how about life with the Brauns? What would you say has been the biggest adjustment for you? Moving in with your birth father and his family? Dylan: They’re just different, I guess. Dr. Morley: Different from your old life, you mean? Dylan: Un-huh. Dr. Morley: Different how? Dylan: Just different. Dr. Morley: Okay… can you give me a couple examples of how things are different with your new family than they were living with Eli? Dylan: [sighs] They talk more. Dr. Morley: So, you and Eli didn’t really talk that much? Dylan: Not really. Dr. Morley: Alright… what’s another way things are different? Dylan: I don’t know… Just everything. Dr. Morley: Such as? One more example. Dylan: Fuck. I don’t know… The way they make everything a production, I guess. Dr. Morley: Mmm. How so? Give me a couple of examples. Dylan: [sighs] Like, any time they go out. Watching a movie. Going to bed. Making fucking popcorn. Dr. Morley: They turn making popcorn into a production? Dylan: Yup. Dr. Morley: How can making popcorn be a production? Now I’m curious. Dylan: They get out a bowl for every single person, nuke the popcorn, put out all this flavored powder crap—like a hundred different flavors. Fuckin’ dill pickle and stuff. They divide the popcorn into the bowls, pass it all around. Sprinkle the powder shit on… it’s just—everything’s like that. Meals, and going out and stuff—it all turns into a big production. Dr. Morley: Huh. I never really thought about that [laughs]. I think I do that, too. Maybe it’s a married thing? Dylan: Maybe. Dr. Morley: So how did you do things before? In your life before Sandy Haven. Dylan: You’d just make the fucking popcorn and eat it. Dr. Morley: [laughs] Makes sense, I guess. Dylan: Yeah. Dr. Morley: So, what’s something that’s different in your new life that you find hardest to adapt to? Dylan: Not sure…. The popcorn thing, I guess. Dr. Morley: Really? You’re telling me the way your new family makes popcorn is the hardest thing to adjust to? Dylan: Yup. Dr. Morley: I call bullshit. Dylan: [No response] Dr. Morley: You’re still not going to change your answer? Dylan: Nope. Dr. Morley: Okay… So, what’s the best thing about your new life, then? Dylan: The money, I guess. Dr. Morley: I get that. Definitely nice not having to stress about money, right? Dylan: Yeah. Dr. Morley: What was the money situation like for you—before? Dylan: I was living on the streets. How do you think the money situation was? Dr. Morley: Fair point… What about a couple months before you got arrested—when you were living with Eli—what was the money situation like there? Dylan: You made do. You figured it out. Dr. Morley: How so? Dylan: Just like I said. You figured it out. Dr. Morley: And part of figuring it out would be… Dylan: Whatever you had to do. Dr. Morley: So… possibly stealing? Dylan: [unintelligible] Dr. Morley: Going hungry some days? Dylan: Sure. Dr. Morley: Any thoughts on that? Dylan: Nope. Dr. Morley: Alright, so… pretty different situations, then—your life before and your life now. A lot of adapting, I’m sure. How is that? All the changes… What’s that like? Dylan: It’s fine. Dr. Morley: Mmm. Can you… How would you describe your life before? Not just the money situation. But in general, if you had to describe what life was like living with Eli? Dylan: It was pretty much normal. Dr. Morley: Okay. Describe normal. Dylan: Just— normal. You’d just do your thing. Do whatever. As long as you didn’t get in his way, you’d be fine. Could do what you wanted, pretty much. Nothing ever really happened. Dr. Morley: Okay. And what about if you did get in Eli’s way? Dylan: Nothing crazy. You’d get locked in the closet for a couple days, something like that. Only if you pissed him off, though, or bugged him or something. Dr. Morley: Alright. And when you say your life with Eli was pretty normal, is the closet thing an example of that? Or different in some way? Dylan: It was normal, ’cos Eli wasn’t like the people here, talking about feelings and emotions and crap. Eli’s tough, and he wanted you to be tough. He did what he had to do to make you that way. Treated you like a man, not like a kid. Dr. Morley: Okay. And how did it make you feel—when he locked you in the closet? Dylan: You just dealt with it. It was fine. You knew if you didn’t toe the line—if you triggered a mood or something—you’d get sent to the closet for a couple days. Or the bathroom. When you got older… got bigger, I guess—it was the bathroom. Dr. Morley: Alright, I see… So, when you say your life before was normal; let’s talk a bit more about that. Can you tell me ways it was most normal? And ways it was least normal? Dylan: It was most normal ’cos it was normal. You just… lived. Watched TV and skateboarded or whatever. And it was least normal… I don’t know. Because of not going to school, I guess. Dr. Morley: Makes sense. Dylan: [no response] Dr. Morley: Are there times when you wished you had gone to school? Dylan: … Sure. I guess, sometimes. Dr. Morley: Mmm. I get that. Dr. Morley: So… again—when you think about things from your life before that were most normal and least normal… the fact that Eli would sometimes kill people—would you say that was pretty normal or not so normal? Or somewhere in between? Dylan: [movements heard] Real obvious what you’re doing— trying to make out like Eli was a monster. Because of what you’ve read in the papers. You’ve obviously made up your mind about him, so… whatever. I’m not gonna talk about it. He’s locked up, anyway. None of it matters anymore. Dr. Morley: You’re right. I don’t know anything about Eli, except what I saw printed in the papers. But that’s not the side I’m interested in, Dylan. Forget what the papers said. What I’m interested in is your experience with him—bad or good or anything in between. And the killing thing strikes me as one of the least normal aspects about being raised by him, so I was curious why it wasn’t the first thing that came to mind for you. And you don’t have to agree with me. I don’t want you to agree with me if you think I’m wrong about something. Dylan: It wasn’t the first thing that came to mind for me because I’m fucking sick of hearing about it! All the fucking time! But yeah, the fact that he’s a serial killer is obviously not normal. I fucking know that. Knew it then, too. I’m not an idiot. Just because I didn’t go to school doesn’t mean I’m a total idiot. That I think being a serial killer is normal. Dr. Morley: I’m sorry if I made you feel like that. Truly, Dylan, I do not think you’re stupid. In a lot of ways, you’re a hell of a lot smarter than I was at your age. Dylan: [no response] Dr. Morley: Let’s talk about something else for a bit, hm? What about TV… You into any good shows right now? Dylan: [no response] Dr. Morley: My wife and I have been watching one of those cringey reality shows sometimes before bed. Love is Blind? You heard of it? Dylan: Nope. Dr. Morley: Well, count yourself lucky. It’s absolute drivel. Dylan: [no response] Dr. Morley: So, what’s your poison? You a comedy guy? Action movie guy? Dylan: Look, I’m done. Is Phil back yet from running errands or whatever he went to do? Dr. Morley: I believe he’s in the waiting room, yes… Look, give me ten more minutes of your time, Dylan, and we’ll cut out early. We can talk about anything you want… School me on the most under-rated band right now… Or fill me in on the lamest class you have to take at your new school. Don’t they have all those weird classes at private schools now? With clever acronyms. Aren’t acronyms the big thing these days? Dylan: What’s an acronym? Dr. Morley: When they use the first letter of words in a sentence and put them together. Like… NASA is an acronym. First letters of each word in National Aeronautics and Space Administration. Dylan: Huh. Dr. Morley: Only with programs in schools, they usually try to get all clever. Like AVID—for Advancement Via Individual Determination. That kind of thing. Dylan: That a real one or you just make it up? Dr. Morley: Real one. Dylan: Seriously? Dr. Morley: True story. Dylan: [no response] Dr. Morley: So… Do they have any of those programs at SH Prep? Dylan: Probably. Look, I said I’m done, man. Dr. Morley: Alrighty. Just one last question. Dylan: [no response] Dr. Morley: You get to ask me the question, though. Anything you want. Dylan: [no response] Dr. Morley: Come on. Hit me. Anything at all. Dylan: [no response] Dr. Morley: Rare opportunity here, Dylan. I don’t offer this chance up to just anybody. Sooner you ask me something, sooner we’re done. Dylan: Fine. How much is Phil paying you? Dr. Morley: Oof… Hitting me with the money question. Dylan: Pretty sure you asked me a couple money questions earlier. Dr. Morley: [laughs] I did, didn’t I? Alright then, my hourly rate is two-hundred-and-fifty dollars. Dylan: Two-hundred-and… What the fuck? For asking a bunch of bullshit questions? Dr. Morley: [laughs] Wow. Good to know you think my questions are bullshit. Dylan: Well, they sure as hell aren’t two-hundred-and-fifty-dollar questions, I’ll tell you that. Dr. Morley: [laughs] Again, with the flattery. Dylan: [no response] Dr. Morley: If it makes you feel any better, I only take on a couple clients a year these days. So don’t go getting any ideas that I’m driving home to some oceanfront mansion in my sexy Lambo or anything. Dylan: Maybe you should’ve taken on more than a couple clients. Dr. Morley: I could… I like the healthy work-life balance, though. And a twenty-one sedan is more my thing, anyway. Here—don’t forget your jacket. It’s chilly out there. [rustling noises] Dylan: Two-hundred-and-fifty-bucks and all you ever offer me is fucking water or juice? Dr. Morley: [laughs] Well, what would you have me offer? Dylan: I don’t know… Burger and fries? Full-size bag of fancy chips, at least. Dr. Morley: Ah, but then I’d have to up my rate to two-sixty. Those fancy chips aren’t cheap. Dylan: [no response] Dr. Morley: Well, I’ll let you get on your way. I’ll see you Wednesday afternoon? Dylan: Sure. Dr. Morley: And remember, you can always call me if anything comes up in between sessions. If something’s on your mind, no matter how big or small or weird or random, call me. Any time… I mean it. Dylan: Yeah, I’ll bet, at the rates you’re charging. Dr. Morley: Tell you what—I won’t charge for phone calls. Dylan: I’ll be sure to leave a really long voicemail, then.